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The Hard Skills

Tuesday, January 23, 2024
23
Jan
Facebook Live Video from 2024/01/23-Embracing Your Leadership: How to Step into Your Power with Mentorship & Actionable Steps

 
Facebook Live Video from 2024/01/23-Embracing Your Leadership: How to Step into Your Power with Mentorship & Actionable Steps

 

2024/01/23-Embracing Your Leadership: How to Step into Your Power with Mentorship & Actionable Steps

[NEW EPISODE] Embracing Your Leadership: How to Step into Your Power with Mentorship & Actionable Steps

Tuesdays: 5:00pm - 6:00pm (EST)                              


EPISODE SUMMARY:

What if you lead a business, department or team, but find it unnatural to see yourself as a leader? It's hard to fully step into your power when your personal identity as at odds with how others see you in your leadership roles. In this episode, we explore the power of mentorship in leadership identity and non-traditional leadership paths. We'll learn how well-matched mentoring relationships paired with systematic skills-based personal growth strategies can help leaders with marginalized identities conquer their dreams.

Dr. Sara Rabinovitch is a clinical psychologist, as well as an expert trainer, supervisor, and consultant in evidence-based therapies for anxiety disorders, OCD & traumatic stress. Her clients are primarily engineers & scientists who are blessed with brilliantly logical & scrupulous minds that fuel their ability to solve complex problems, while sometimes diminishing personal happiness & life satisfaction. 


As a consultant, Dr. Sara provides training & support for employee wellbeing & inclusion across sectors including finance, tech, media & athletics. In her tech work, Dr. Sara founded EquiSkills App by MinMind, a skills-based training app for inclusive and progressive companies that addresses employee wellbeing and DEI issues with on-demand research-based skills from behavior science. EquiSkills offers effective, complementary support for translating employee learning into actionable and measurable outcomes. Sara is also an Adjunct Assistant Professor in Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences at Keck Medicine of USC, where she supervises & trains medical residents. 

pacificmndfl.com

#DEI, #mindfulness, #employeewellbeing, #behsci, #skills, #inclusion, #mentalhealth

#TheHardSkills #leadershipdevelopment #leadershipcoaching #leadershipconsulting

Tune in for this empowering conversation at TalkRadio.nyc


Show Notes

Segment  1

The initial minutes of the discussion focused on Dr. Sara Rabinovitch's background and the recent launch of her app, currently in Beta development.  A thought-provoking question arose regarding the characteristics of a leader. Dr. Rabinovitch explained that there are often stereotypes or prototypes associated with being identified as a leader. She emphasized that she diverges from the traditional image of a leader, underscoring how one's background and cultural identities play a crucial role in shaping their leadership personality. Furthermore, she brought attention to the problem that societal perceptions of leaders frequently fail to accurately represent individuals with marginalized identities.

Segment 2

The following segment explored the concept of mentorship, discussing the significance of having a "well-matched" mentor. It delved into the idea that an effective mentor may possess diverse skill sets, aiming to broaden perspectives and facilitate shifts toward specific goals for the mentee. While sticking with a mentor who shares similar views might feel comfortable, embracing the opportunity to expand one's horizons can lead to growth. Having a mentor who challenges existing perceptions and skills can be particularly beneficial for personal and professional development. It's important to find a mentor who is "grounded" and genuinely cares about your development as a well-rounded leader. While having a mentor with a similar background or beliefs is valuable, it's also essential to connect with them on a genuine and comfortable level.  

Segment 3

In this part, we revisited the initial segment about how leaders are seen from an external perspective. However, the focus shifted to the emotional aspect of leadership, exploring how leaders think and respond under stress while working with others. The use of these hard skills profoundly affects the workplace ambiance, with credit to the crucial role of an effective leader providing guidance and encouragement. Additionally, physical strength is a byproduct of the competence required to effectively shape the desired work environment. Dr. Rabinovitch emphasized the importance of confidence as a foundational element in building a business. However, she highlighted the need for a balanced approach, advocating for openness and vulnerability to feedback. Emphasizing receiving feedback from mentors or colleagues is crucial for growth and gaining insights that may be overlooked when expanding your company or project.

Segment 4

  In the concluding segment, the discussion revolved around the environment and individuals accompanying you on your leadership journey. It addressed the significance of assessing whether these individuals truly support your growth in all aspects. The emphasis was on the importance of focusing on role models or individuals who actively encourage your growth. Above all, trust your instincts about situations and people. Also, observe body language and be aware of whether others genuinely support your success or see you as a threat.


Transcript

00:00:39.110 --> 00:00:44.669 Mira Brancu: Welcome! Welcome to the hard skills with me, Dr. Mirabu.

00:00:44.930 --> 00:00:57.219 Mira Brancu: Today's guest is Dr. Sarah Rabinovich, and we'll be talking about. How do I embrace the idea of leadership when the term itself doesn't feel quite natural or quite right for you.

00:00:57.290 --> 00:01:01.780 Mira Brancu: And so how do you step into your power with mentorship and actionable steps?

00:01:01.900 --> 00:01:07.290 Mira Brancu: It's a perfect focus for this season's theme of developing leadership identity.

00:01:07.510 --> 00:01:09.870 Mira Brancu: And it's great to have you on the show, Sarah.

00:01:10.100 --> 00:01:36.180 Dr. Sara: You it's so good to be here, Vera and I have been working with Mira for quite some time, and it's been hugely impactful. So I'm so glad to to talk today and to share some about her work which is very relevant. And some of my journeys. Thank you, Mira, very, very kind. Sarah is one of my favorite people, so very excited to have her on and actually back, you might notice recognize her from January second

00:01:36.190 --> 00:01:54.560 Mira Brancu: on January second, we had several founding members and Advisory Board members from our Towerscope Leadership Academy program, and she was one of them. She was already slated to be on the show, anyway. So this is round 2 for me and Sarah

00:01:54.820 --> 00:01:59.910 Mira Brancu: as a reminder. Everybody on the show. We discussed how to develop the nuanced

00:01:59.960 --> 00:02:07.849 Mira Brancu: hard skills, not soft skills needed to drive significant systemic change, to make real impact through your leadership.

00:02:08.009 --> 00:02:09.090 Mira Brancu: Be ready.

00:02:09.330 --> 00:02:16.889 Mira Brancu: Take notes. I always do reflect deeply, and identify at least one small step

00:02:17.060 --> 00:02:20.910 Mira Brancu: to further develop your hard skills muscles, but based on what you learned today.

00:02:21.210 --> 00:02:35.839 Mira Brancu: A little bit about Dr. Sarah Rabinovich. She is a clinical psychologist by training. expert in evidence-based therapies for anxiety disorders, obsessive compulsive disorder or Ocd

00:02:35.850 --> 00:02:37.580 Mira Brancu: and traumatic stress.

00:02:37.980 --> 00:02:50.579 Mira Brancu: She's also a trainer and consultant for employee well-being and inclusion across sectors, including finance, tech media and athletics. And that's actually an interesting background that she has.

00:02:50.660 --> 00:02:56.939 Mira Brancu: and she's also the founder of equiscales app by minmind.

00:02:57.090 --> 00:03:22.030 Mira Brancu: an on-demand, research-informed app for companies that want effective actionable solutions for their employee well-being and Dee needs. Dr. Sarah is also an adjunct assistant professor in psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Tech, medical of Usc. Where she supervises and trains medical students. So yeah, she keeps busy.

00:03:22.340 --> 00:03:29.270 Mira Brancu: Absolutely. Yeah. So let's

00:03:29.370 --> 00:03:33.600 Mira Brancu: Let's ease into this a little bit, Sarah. How did you end up

00:03:33.710 --> 00:03:59.819 Mira Brancu: from clinical psychology into app development, all of like the integration of Dei and mindfulness and anxiety work. There's there's a lot of interest there. Yeah, how did you come to this space? Yeah, well, it's very interesting. And I know when you think about a clinical psychologist, someone who's sitting across from you and

00:03:59.820 --> 00:04:29.570 Dr. Sara: actively listening and and helping you solve problems. You don't often think, forget that she doesn't listen, and, in fact, did not myself build the app. I could never do that. And I had a wonderful engineering team build it. But how did I get from being a clinical psychologist to there? I should say it's been. I'll even go back a little bit further that I was an athlete. Speaking of what you were saying, I was a college basketball player way back when?

00:04:29.570 --> 00:04:46.710 Dr. Sara: 20 years. Yeah, 20 years now. And power forward. Not that anyone asked, but and so I have always been someone who kind of like sees goal settings being critical to moving forward and anything, whether that's

00:04:47.060 --> 00:05:05.079 Dr. Sara: perfecting your free throw, whether that's learning to overcome depression and like whether that's figuring out how to be empowered and embodied in the workplace, to climb up the ladder if you will. And so, although they seem kind of disparate. They're very much connected. And

00:05:05.260 --> 00:05:21.199 Dr. Sara: so I was a Clemens psychologist for a long time, and was doing lots of mindfulness training during Covid with different organizations and workshops and mental skills, and actually at this time met with Mira and

00:05:21.200 --> 00:05:36.250 Dr. Sara: which was extremely gratuitous and I was at sort of a a crossroads I was in this consultation. Part of my work was building up, and I had all these organizations, nonprofit and corporate reaching out to do

00:05:36.260 --> 00:06:00.649 Dr. Sara: Dei and mental wellness, workshops and trainings and conferences. And I was like, I don't know what I'm doing. I I'm like, and I feel like I've hacked this weird system like I even was that reflecting on this initial conversation that Mira and I had like 4 years ago. And she's like, you think everyone can do that and talk about soft skills being hard skills. But I didn't know I did. I was a psychologist. I said, Yeah,

00:06:00.670 --> 00:06:09.880 Dr. Sara: so with through working with you, Mira. Honestly, it was very, very integral to my movement into the tech sphere.

00:06:09.890 --> 00:06:34.850 Dr. Sara: After doing about 3 years of consultation work and workshops and conferences. Folks were saying at the organizations like in companies, hey, give us more resources. Like, you know, we want our employees to be skilled up and to stay. We wanna retain them. We want to capitalize on productivity. And I was like, well, I'm gonna develop an app. And I developed a pretty shoddy and very behavior. Science focused a pretty

00:06:34.850 --> 00:06:48.290 Dr. Sara: shoddy squarespace app that Mira actually was. I think the second person after my.

00:06:48.290 --> 00:06:59.390 Dr. Sara: in immensely in moving through different developmental stages of this. And we are now in the Beta testing stage. And so it's really exciting. And I think

00:06:59.500 --> 00:07:13.139 Dr. Sara: this journey absolutely coincided with the journey in leadership identity. So it's quite relevant to to the to the talk today. Awesome, awesome. Okay? So with all of the roles that you've had.

00:07:13.170 --> 00:07:26.590 Mira Brancu: right like, there's the business owner role. There is the trainer role that you mentioned. There's founder of, you know the app. There's your supervisor and mentor to to others.

00:07:27.160 --> 00:07:36.919 Mira Brancu: Where they looked at you as a leader in those roles. Right. But what made it hard for you to step into seeing yourself in that way?

00:07:37.640 --> 00:07:42.860 Dr. Sara: Oh, that's such a good question. II think that, like the broader

00:07:42.870 --> 00:08:04.360 Dr. Sara: the scope here is that like, when we think about what a leader looks like, we have lots of prototypes that enter our minds, I mean, for folks who are listening to this right now, when you hear the word, the leader, what comes to your mind really implicitly. For me, it's a host of different cultural identities that are you know, white male.

00:08:04.420 --> 00:08:13.540 Dr. Sara: taller. I guess there's shorter male leaders, too. But stature is one factor in this. We think about personality, characteristics like

00:08:13.540 --> 00:08:34.710 Dr. Sara: dominant and scrupulous and delegating, and sometimes ruthless, all these characteristics. And and so I look in the mirror, and I reflect on my personality traits and they are like couldn't be further from those I just listed. And so like, I thought, like, how can I? How could I identify as a leader?

00:08:35.030 --> 00:08:48.819 Dr. Sara: I'm a woman. I have a Jewish last name. I'm Jewish. I am an Lgbtq community member, happily married with 2 kids went on the way, and I am. Yes, I'm a mom, and I am

00:08:49.060 --> 00:09:16.739 Dr. Sara: free spirited. I don't know if you can tell, probably from my background. I'm not the most organized person in the world that, to say the least. My wife is our family, CEO. So? No, no, no part of my personality fits into what this kind of prototype would convey. And so it was immensely hard for me to identify with this concept of being a leader. And honestly, it's it's it still is hard at times. My, my confidence ebs and flows, as most people probably does.

00:09:17.250 --> 00:09:21.150 Mira Brancu: Yeah. And you know, this brings up a really good

00:09:21.230 --> 00:09:42.780 Mira Brancu: question. You work in the Dei space right? So you work a lot with people's identities, but especially those from marginalized backgrounds, and you already know how important it is to have a sense of identity and to connect with it, and then what it means when that sense of identity is not accepted. It's rejected. It's invalidated

00:09:42.810 --> 00:09:44.870 Mira Brancu: in the workspace and beyond

00:09:45.490 --> 00:09:48.970 Mira Brancu: and so I'm curious.

00:09:49.910 --> 00:09:53.960 Mira Brancu: for you when you're thinking about leadership identity.

00:09:54.280 --> 00:10:02.840 Mira Brancu: Do you see that as different? Do you see it as an important piece of  when you were described, like when you were describing

00:10:03.160 --> 00:10:05.909 Mira Brancu: who I am, and how I see myself, and

00:10:06.090 --> 00:10:18.130 Mira Brancu: how we define and how we see leaders. There's a lot related to that acceptance of who I am doesn't fit into that identity. Right? So I'm just sort of curious your thoughts on that.

00:10:18.170 --> 00:10:40.859 Dr. Sara: That's such a good question, Mira. Like and honestly like II do think it's so important to. And III didn't. Actually, when I first started working with you, I was like, well, is that? Who cares? If I have a leaders. Identity. I truly, because I didn't know I was, you know, ha! Hadn't been in domains necessarily where I identified with leaders or thought it to be important, and I was like, well, I don't know, I mean, I guess.

00:10:40.860 --> 00:10:49.110 Dr. Sara: And I and I you know I'm pretty competent person in some domains. So I was like, I don't know do I need to identify as a leader? And but I actually think it's

00:10:49.110 --> 00:11:04.780 Dr. Sara: so important, especially for folks who have marginalized identities because it infiltrates so much and really mirror. II don't think I appreciated this fact until engaging with the cohort and telescope and working with you that like.

00:11:05.390 --> 00:11:07.360 Dr. Sara: if you don't think you're a leader.

00:11:07.760 --> 00:11:13.400 Dr. Sara: especially if you have marginalized identities, it is going to show in how you carry yourself in

00:11:13.520 --> 00:11:29.829 Dr. Sara: your self, talk, in the strength of your asks, in the persistence of your nose, in what you go for, what what you social justice is really important to me like, and as a social justice advocate like.

00:11:29.950 --> 00:11:49.550 Dr. Sara: where where my voice would be completely lost if I wasn't able to embody these qualities that and this this identity of a leader and so II think it's so important, especially for those of us who are in traditionally marginalized communities who who are not seen as leaders by the majority. No.

00:11:50.150 --> 00:11:55.499 Mira Brancu: that is beautifully said. I was trying to write every single word that you said there,

00:11:56.000 --> 00:12:02.280 Mira Brancu: given that. what does it take to reconcile the

00:12:02.470 --> 00:12:06.420 Mira Brancu:  the the

00:12:06.450 --> 00:12:14.210 Mira Brancu: perspective that we have about leadership and leaders and and the identity that we've been told.

00:12:14.270 --> 00:12:16.219 Mira Brancu: We must have

00:12:16.410 --> 00:12:25.339 Mira Brancu: versus how you see yourself, how you want to see yourself, and what you would find as supportive and embracing of who you are.

00:12:26.060 --> 00:12:32.829 Dr. Sara: Yeah, II mean, I think all the way mentorship and not just mentorship. But I think

00:12:32.880 --> 00:12:49.509 Dr. Sara: mentorship. That's well matched, like I rec I recall from like, however, many years ago, 5 years, because I reached out and then was pregnant and sick, and and then reached out again after the babies are born and the twin not be so twins. Yeah, and I remember really resonating with

00:12:49.510 --> 00:13:10.869 Dr. Sara: a lot of the work that you were doing that. The your team was all women and you and they were. You were training and supporting them and advocating for them, and you had done a host of like transformative projects throughout the Va. And you were launching into other spheres. And II you seemed so

00:13:10.920 --> 00:13:17.819 Dr. Sara: genuine. And the questions that you asked me, and the listening that felt so

00:13:18.150 --> 00:13:20.270 Dr. Sara: viscerally on point

00:13:20.400 --> 00:13:24.699 Dr. Sara: made me realize that, like similar to when you work with a therapist

00:13:25.210 --> 00:13:31.609 Dr. Sara: hopefully, like, you know, you feel heard and mirrored, and not

00:13:31.720 --> 00:13:51.249 Dr. Sara: the kind of vehicle of someone else's agenda being imposed upon you. You know, because, like you're saying Mira like it, it's an individual journey to reconcile who you see yourself as and how society sees you with the aspirations you might have, or I might have like to become a leader.

00:13:51.390 --> 00:14:09.070 Dr. Sara: so I think mentorship is critical, really, thank you for for years. But thank you absolutely. Let's dig into like why and how it works. Right you you had you mentioned something about well, match. So let's dig into that. After we come back from the add break. So

00:14:09.070 --> 00:14:31.240 Mira Brancu: we are reaching an ad break. You're listening to the hard skills with me, Dr. Mirabanka and our guest, Dr. Sarah Rabinovich. We air Tuesdays at 5 pm. Eastern. If you would like to join our online audience and ask questions right now, we can answer them in real time. You can find us on Linkedin or at Youtube at talk radio, Nyc, and we'll be right back with our guest in just a moment.

00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:50.280 Mira Brancu: Welcome back with me, Doctor Mirabu on the hard skills. And our guest, Doctor Sarah Rabinovich.

00:16:50.440 --> 00:17:03.149 Mira Brancu: We have been. We went right into it. I mean, we like Dove deep right into identity, identity development. How you reconcile when your

00:17:03.440 --> 00:17:06.799 Mira Brancu: own perception of your identity?

00:17:06.810 --> 00:17:29.130 Mira Brancu: And or if you're coming from an identity that is marginalized is not reflected. In you know society's perceptions of leaders. How do you reconcile that? And especially when you are trying to make a difference? Be noticed. Be have your voice heard and

00:17:29.580 --> 00:17:46.659 Mira Brancu: you know, and you need to sort of step into it. And so Sara started talking about how mentorship is a key to that. I totally actually didn't even connect the fact that it is national Mentorship month. So this is perfect for this month. So

00:17:47.130 --> 00:18:04.640 Mira Brancu: you mentioned a well matched mentorship. So let's let's get into that. What is what does it mean to be well matched? Why do you need to be looking for and identifying a good match. What? What is a good match? If people are like? Yes, I need a mentor. I want a mentor.

00:18:04.680 --> 00:18:11.290 Mira Brancu: Ho! How do I find one? What? What are the things that you were looking for? What are the things that you have found?

00:18:11.460 --> 00:18:18.600 Dr. Sara:  really help you? That's a really good question. II haven't II

00:18:19.370 --> 00:18:21.710 Dr. Sara: said, well matched without even like

00:18:22.030 --> 00:18:33.029 Dr. Sara: breaking it down in my head, about what that meant, and you break it down. Now, yeah, yeah, no. And I've been breaking it down as you've been asking the question. I was thinking, like, well matched like, I think one important feature of that is

00:18:34.030 --> 00:18:36.670 finding a mentor who has a

00:18:36.770 --> 00:18:58.660 Dr. Sara: different skill set from you, that, and I don't know that this is true for everyone, but I know for me that it's incredibly helpful to work with a mentor like you, Mira, who offers a very different set of skills, because having a different set of skills helps you. I think, mentor in a way that expand, that helps the person you're mentoring expand upon

00:18:58.710 --> 00:19:09.459 Dr. Sara: their skill set, and I kind of think you you can. You know this right away when you meet with someone and wonder if they'd be a good mentor for you think about your fit as a mentor, like II think.

00:19:09.830 --> 00:19:12.759 Dr. Sara: in our initial conversations I felt myself

00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:26.510 Dr. Sara: my, I felt my mind expanded like I was pulled to think about things that I hadn't thought about, and from perspectives that, like someone who was in my brain, wouldn't necessarily have. And

00:19:27.510 --> 00:19:29.809 I left our first meeting thinking.

00:19:30.100 --> 00:19:43.479 Dr. Sara: wow! I learned a lot. You know how you talk to someone, whether it's in a mentorship meeting or at work, or even someone you meet at a bar or airport or something, and you and you say, Wow, like you think about the conversation later, because it

00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:59.319 Mira Brancu: shifted, expanded some some cognitive paradigm that you have. I think that is a critical part of it. Really. Yeah, I really like this idea of complementary. A lot of us sort of

00:19:59.490 --> 00:20:19.670 Mira Brancu: feel so comfortable with the same thing that sometimes we seek a mentor who just reflects what we were already thinking, and that might be validating, and it might be supportive, and it might feel good for a short period of time. But it certainly doesn't push you to grow and think about things in different ways. And so to your credit.

00:20:19.740 --> 00:20:21.370 Mira Brancu: you thought to yourself.

00:20:21.540 --> 00:20:30.139 Mira Brancu: this is challenging me, and I like that. This, this is

00:20:30.530 --> 00:20:35.540 Mira Brancu: giving me such a different perspective. And

00:20:35.730 --> 00:20:45.079 Mira Brancu: that is something that I want. Not everybody does that calculation to fill a gap that they're experiencing because.

00:20:45.130 --> 00:20:48.660 Mira Brancu: that requires you to have enough

00:20:48.740 --> 00:21:00.159 Mira Brancu: vulnerability and insight to recognize, like I have a gap, and there's something that I'm looking for to fill it, and it will take some work for me to get there

00:21:00.310 --> 00:21:17.649 Dr. Sara: totally, and to have some baseline confidence that, like, you know like, you're saying confidence that you can be vulnerable, and that you you need to grow, and that it will be hard, and that some things will kind of push you off kilter. But change happens when we're off. Kilter. Yeah, absolutely. Now.

00:21:18.050 --> 00:21:20.650 Mira Brancu: when it comes to a mentor

00:21:20.740 --> 00:21:32.420 Mira Brancu: related to leadership identity in particular cause. We have lots of mentors to guide us through our careers right? But when it comes to like to guide us through a leadership, identity.

00:21:32.540 --> 00:21:36.760 Mira Brancu: model development leaning into it.

00:21:36.830 --> 00:21:39.330 Mira Brancu: Is there anything else

00:21:39.610 --> 00:21:43.029 Mira Brancu: that makes sense to seek?

00:21:43.740 --> 00:22:03.529 Dr. Sara: Yeah, I think I think one very important part is finding someone with who on some cultural level can understand you that, like someone who has been in your shoes to some capacity before you were trained as psychologists or psychologists. And identifies a woman. And I think that is

00:22:03.580 --> 00:22:17.999 Dr. Sara: for me, being a woman in this sphere like it was so important for me to have a strong female mentor when I thought about moving into a leadership domain. And I also was really

00:22:20.030 --> 00:22:31.499 Dr. Sara: looking for someone who I genuinely liked as a person and respected as a person. I know. That sounds, you know, was a second color, but it's very important, and

00:22:31.720 --> 00:22:34.479 Dr. Sara: and I think both in conjunction.

00:22:34.790 --> 00:22:35.970 Dr. Sara: So

00:22:37.890 --> 00:23:03.239 Dr. Sara: I also think part of my language, choosing a mentor who can see outside their own ship, you know, like in leadership development is so important. Since, like you, I mean, we've all been on journeys and all sorts of leaders who are mentors and leadership are going through their own kind of bureaucratic catastrophes every second. And so, I think, being able to having a mentor who is truly grounded and can, like

00:23:03.400 --> 00:23:10.290 Dr. Sara: see outside their own context, to help you develop your identity merely because, like, they want to help you

00:23:10.640 --> 00:23:24.959 Mira Brancu: for your identity, not for any other agenda. I think it's so important. And I absolutely has found that in our work as I've shared with you a bunch of times, and I will add a few others that I've sort of learned over time are important for

00:23:24.970 --> 00:23:27.740 Mira Brancu: any mentoring relationship.

00:23:27.770 --> 00:23:30.850 Mira Brancu: And one is.

00:23:31.440 --> 00:23:45.620 Mira Brancu: it needs to feel mutually beneficial. And for the mentee, you don't always realize it actually is like, I had an amazing mentor who, after you know, a a 10 year.

00:23:45.760 --> 00:23:50.110 Mira Brancu: you know, sort of working relationship working together.

00:23:50.370 --> 00:24:15.109 Mira Brancu: and I left my my position. Which which meant II couldn't continue with seeking, you know, and having his mentorship in that way for that role. I wrote him a letter, and I said, you know, here are the 15 ways that you have impacted my life. And you know, I just so. I'm so grateful I so appreciate. I don't. I just don't know where I'd be, you know, with without your mentorship.

00:24:15.210 --> 00:24:16.580 Mira Brancu: And

00:24:16.810 --> 00:24:22.130 Mira Brancu: he said. Mira, you do know this was mutually beneficial, right like

00:24:22.220 --> 00:24:34.560 Mira Brancu: I got as much out of it as you did. And here's the the 15 things I got out of it, you know. And I'm like. Yes, okay, that makes sense. It did not occur to me. But

00:24:34.650 --> 00:24:40.589 Mira Brancu: in order for a mentoring relationship to to truly work. You know it.

00:24:40.850 --> 00:24:44.020 Mira Brancu: It's often that both

00:24:44.100 --> 00:24:59.799 Mira Brancu: parties are are getting something out of it. And even if you don't realize it, right? So that's one and it sort of goes into my second point. Which is that when it's lopsided, when it doesn't feel right.

00:24:59.990 --> 00:25:02.830 Mira Brancu: It's often that

00:25:03.450 --> 00:25:15.789 Mira Brancu: the mentor sees you as a narcissistic extension of them. Meaning you're smiling, cause you're a psychologist exactly what I mean. But for those of you who like

00:25:15.880 --> 00:25:22.599 Mira Brancu: are not psychologists. And I'm like, what does that mean? That sounds loaded? Just basically meaning that

00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:45.190 Mira Brancu: they see you as someone who could play out their legacy. And so the feedback that they give you the advice that they give you is less about you and more about their needs, and how you can fulfill their needs, and it feels wrong, and it feels bad, and you might not know why. But that's usually a very lopsided relationship. Right?

00:25:46.040 --> 00:26:01.520 Dr. Sara: That's a good point. I think that's what I meant by seeing past your own graph that yeah, that that I never, have never felt like a narcissistic appendage of you. Yeah, I've been there a couple of times. People when mentors have introduced me, and like you could just

00:26:01.680 --> 00:26:22.629 Mira Brancu: tell you could feel they're like walking me into the room in order to elevate their status because, like, look at this wonderful person and what she's achieved. Doesn't that make me amazing? I'm like, you know, this feels bad. So

00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:33.109 Mira Brancu: that's what sort of goes into, you know, some of the sort of thoughtful, well matched, as you say, mentoring relationships. And when it comes to

00:26:33.560 --> 00:26:35.560 Mira Brancu: leadership. Identity.

00:26:35.660 --> 00:26:38.570 Mira Brancu:  it's

00:26:39.570 --> 00:26:53.709 Mira Brancu: it's something more than that. I mean, I think, what there's there's something I feel like you were seeking that I think people would really benefit from hearing about trying to reconcile a couple of things.

00:26:53.880 --> 00:26:56.060 Mira Brancu: You know. What?

00:26:56.210 --> 00:26:59.460 Mira Brancu: What did it take to get to the point

00:26:59.490 --> 00:27:03.520 Mira Brancu: where you were like. Yes, I see myself

00:27:03.570 --> 00:27:11.780 Mira Brancu: in a leadership role, even if it doesn't fit like the old traditional mould. I see myself in that way, and it feels

00:27:11.900 --> 00:27:12.979 Mira Brancu: good to me.

00:27:13.170 --> 00:27:14.010 Dr. Sara: Hmm!

00:27:15.090 --> 00:27:24.420 Dr. Sara: That's a great question. I mean, I it still does vacillate to an extent like, and I think, just based on life events and based on professional events that happen.

00:27:27.190 --> 00:27:31.200 Dr. Sara: it's very physical feeling. Interestingly, it's a very

00:27:31.390 --> 00:27:38.330 Dr. Sara: physical feeling. And you I began to see myself as someone who

00:27:38.850 --> 00:27:49.859 Dr. Sara: almost had physical strength. Which is really, when we think about like leadership and identity, like we behaviorally have to enact certain steps the way you mentioned the introduction.

00:27:50.220 --> 00:28:15.140 Dr. Sara:  I also like S. Realize that, like I no longer had tolerance for Bs, like I think I went through, and I've been very diplomatic at at times. And and and I think there's a lot of effectiveness and being someone who's able to be diplomatic and has those soft skills or hard skills. And I re, II, my tolerance for Bs now is very, very low, like II got a text from a

00:28:15.220 --> 00:28:22.460 Dr. Sara: someone who's not a supervisor, who's my app same level as me, basically saying, like.

00:28:22.770 --> 00:28:30.190 Dr. Sara: When can you talk today is a Friday? When can a colleague? Yeah, when can you talk today? These are the times that I have available?

00:28:31.210 --> 00:28:47.570 Dr. Sara: I literally didn't. Even my, I normally, I could feel anxious like if I didn't. If I hadn't come into my own I'd be like Oh, my gosh! They need to talk to me like, what did I do wrong? That's like who the heck is. This person like? I am busy all day, and then I'm getting off work at 2 Pm. And I'm picking up my twins and

00:28:47.670 --> 00:28:57.489 Dr. Sara: holding them tightly. And then I'm getting on my best. But I'm having fun not thinking about this, and I think it it. It really comes down to

00:28:57.790 --> 00:28:59.010 Dr. Sara: self-respect.

00:28:59.030 --> 00:29:09.290 Dr. Sara: I just wrote that on my piece of paper. Yes, it. It sounds like, you know, respect for self.

00:29:09.490 --> 00:29:18.160 Mira Brancu: Which helps you put the boundaries and you know the messaging out there that

00:29:18.340 --> 00:29:30.759 Dr. Sara: you know I respect myself, and I expect other people to respect me too, just as much as I respect myself. Yeah. And then yes, she did text me 3 days later and said, like, when you have a chance at your earliest convenience. And I thought, like

00:29:31.080 --> 00:29:34.159 Dr. Sara: point made sign up, yeah, yeah.

00:29:34.210 --> 00:29:38.649 Mira Brancu: yeah, absolutely. We. We don't realize how much.

00:29:38.760 --> 00:30:03.659 Mira Brancu: You know, we train other people to treat us in certain ways, whether that's good or bad. Of course there's there's some people who could not care less how you want to be treated. But we do have some control and power over that. Okay, we are actually nearing an ad break. We're you're listening to the hard skills with me, Dr. Mirabanku and our guest, Dr. Sarah Rabinovich, and we'll be right back. And in just a moment

00:32:03.670 --> 00:32:10.780 Mira Brancu: Welcome back to the hard skills with me, Dr. Mirabu and our guest, Dr. Sarah Rabinovich.

00:32:10.950 --> 00:32:14.480 Mira Brancu: Dr. Sarah. you

00:32:14.770 --> 00:32:19.749 Mira Brancu: you are a multi-talented woman who has somehow figured out a way

00:32:19.890 --> 00:32:26.680 Mira Brancu: to apply performance psychology from your athlete days and working with athletes.

00:32:27.050 --> 00:32:34.389 Mira Brancu: with Dei work. with mindfulness and anxiety and trauma stress expertise

00:32:34.870 --> 00:32:47.920 Mira Brancu: all in one which is. that's something most people can imagine doing. You're like, you're like creating recipes. Special ingredients to turn it into what you do.

00:32:47.970 --> 00:32:54.200 Mira Brancu: How do you see these coming together in a way that sort of meets a very unique

00:32:54.370 --> 00:33:00.040 Mira Brancu: you know, a population of people. Especially leaders and organizations.

00:33:00.410 --> 00:33:17.810 Dr. Sara:  well, thank you for the compliment, although I think a lot of it more has to do with being someone who just is. So yeah, like, insatiably curious about the world and different things. And I'm constantly teaching myself all sorts of different skills. So but I appreciate it. And

00:33:18.230 --> 00:33:22.340 Dr. Sara: how do all these things go together? They go together very neatly. Let me think.

00:33:23.380 --> 00:33:40.969 Dr. Sara: Well, I was talking to an athlete. I work. We have a contract with the Ncaa. And we work with athletes. After my private practice. And this athlete is injured, and was saying, you know I don't know what what. I don't know what the future is going to hold. A very, very smart young woman.

00:33:41.010 --> 00:33:43.120 Dr. Sara: And

00:33:43.530 --> 00:34:11.390 Dr. Sara: a woman who's from the Uk. Who identifies as half black and half Latina and like, you know I don't. I don't know like what what is next for me. I I'm not sure you know what skills I have are transferable. And so and and I was telling her, like all of them, in in doing my a lot of leadership support of leaders, and working on issues of Dei and mental wellness, and looking at like what makes a strong leader.

00:34:11.840 --> 00:34:18.620 Dr. Sara: Athletes have the recipe, I really do. And so if you think about it like, I'll kind of use this analogy to tie it all together like

00:34:18.739 --> 00:34:33.569 Dr. Sara: having played college basketball like you've got your you know your basketball player. For those of you who know basketball. Most people do and you know, like, let's say, like, you know, it's one of the one of the big guys down by the paint. I was big girl down by the paint, actually,

00:34:34.100 --> 00:35:01.149 Dr. Sara: And you you can't tell that I'm 6 feet tall. And so we think you know not. That's actually not that tall for a big girl down in the paint, though. But so we've got this big big guy, big girl, big trans non binary person, whatever someone's identity is down in the court, and like an athlete, has to make so many decisions like there's so much mental flexibility that's needed to figure out one like, where am I? Where am I gonna go from? Am I gonna fake up.

00:35:01.150 --> 00:35:23.060 Dr. Sara: and am I gonna go under and score? Am I gonna pass it back out because I'm realizing that I'm over my head and I can't do this alone. Am I gonna pivot? Because I'm realizing that there's this whole space that I don't even know exists. And I wanna learn more about it. And I'm brave enough to endeavor. As I'm saying these things you're probably thinking, oh, yeah, like a leader absolutely has to do that. And when we think about like

00:35:23.780 --> 00:35:42.199 Dr. Sara: what the qualities of a leader, someone who can be fearless, someone who can stand well under pressure, someone who can pivot someone who's a darn good teammate, someone who truly says, Okay, these are my personal needs and goals. And like, what are the team's goals? Because I can't do this myself.

00:35:42.310 --> 00:35:51.750 Dr. Sara: So someone who's inherently a team player, someone who can, when we talk about stress and how that connects into this like someone who can weather stress.

00:35:51.780 --> 00:36:13.219 Dr. Sara: who has effort to stress fracture and can get up and keep going, and both nurture oneself nurture the team receive feedback, receive nurturance, and also move forward. We think about the same with a leader who's resilient to stress, resilient to economic changes that happen and that you know, create lots of chaos within an organization.

00:36:13.410 --> 00:36:26.519 Dr. Sara: and I think they tie in so well. And we think about like skills as an an athlete develops skills and works on these skills and knows that they can always improve. I think that's the same for a leader

00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:31.630 Dr. Sara: being humble, being open, being persistent and being flexible.

00:36:32.930 --> 00:36:37.959 Mira Brancu: Yeah, all of these

00:36:38.200 --> 00:36:47.980 Mira Brancu: are what I like about these is, it goes beyond the sort of basics of

00:36:48.120 --> 00:36:55.330 Mira Brancu:  How we define leadership from the outside. As you know.

00:36:55.960 --> 00:37:09.580 Mira Brancu: you know, like you, said tall white male, who, you know, is dominant and decisive, or whatever. But it starts moving it into like, what is a leader

00:37:10.090 --> 00:37:11.310 Mira Brancu: offering

00:37:11.630 --> 00:37:20.839 Mira Brancu: to others and to the world? What is the environment the leader is creating for other people. And how are they reaching higher level

00:37:20.940 --> 00:37:22.550 Mira Brancu: of performance?

00:37:23.540 --> 00:37:27.369 Mira Brancu:  for the organization

00:37:28.070 --> 00:37:29.990 Mira Brancu: by engaging in

00:37:30.310 --> 00:37:36.410 Mira Brancu: many of these skills that are much more of an internal fortitude.

00:37:36.580 --> 00:37:39.150 Mira Brancu: As well as

00:37:40.270 --> 00:37:43.909 Mira Brancu: A lot of emotional regulation and emotional awareness

00:37:44.240 --> 00:37:45.090 Dr. Sara: totally

00:37:45.340 --> 00:38:02.530 Dr. Sara: totally skills that can't be overstated when we look at the research on like qualities in a leader, people leave and people leave managers, not jobs. We look at qualities and leaders that are like correlated to astronomical levels with employee retention, productivity.

00:38:03.000 --> 00:38:13.829 Dr. Sara: the future of organizations, like these soft skills, so to speak, are not soft at all like we're playing hardball when we think about some of those outcomes that are like, well, well documented in the research.

00:38:13.950 --> 00:38:20.020 Mira Brancu: Yeah, absolutely. And so then, you know, of course.

00:38:20.050 --> 00:38:30.789 Mira Brancu: when you start learning how to use these skills and embodying them. And you see the impact that it has on your team, on others, on the organization.

00:38:30.810 --> 00:38:40.310 Mira Brancu: Of course. You're going to feel physical strength like you were saying, like the experience of physical strength that you had comes from

00:38:40.550 --> 00:38:45.959 Mira Brancu: the competency that you experience with being really effective

00:38:46.120 --> 00:38:57.669 Mira Brancu: at creating the environment that you want for yourself. Right now, I'm going to tell. I'm gonna it's not a challenge. I'm gonna I'm gonna ask you a completely different way of looking at this

00:38:58.620 --> 00:39:00.890 Mira Brancu: parallel process here.

00:39:01.120 --> 00:39:09.629 Mira Brancu: how do you apply these skills to you building your business? How do you think about the same skills to you building your own business?

00:39:13.520 --> 00:39:16.150 Dr. Sara: I think it's a really good question. And

00:39:19.490 --> 00:39:22.929 Dr. Sara: the biggest skill. I think, that

00:39:23.120 --> 00:39:27.339 Dr. Sara: has improved a ton in working with you and drives. All of this is

00:39:29.340 --> 00:39:34.250 Dr. Sara: confidence, and it's the it's the underlying factor here that

00:39:34.740 --> 00:39:47.850 Dr. Sara: I feel confident, even though I'm stuck in the beta stages and heaven moved, and I'm trying to do all these things, and I'm kind of limited in terms of my daytime availability, because I've got kids and it's like.

00:39:48.300 --> 00:39:55.120 Dr. Sara: I don't know. I constantly revisit some of our conversations, and this physical feeling within me that's confident. That says, like.

00:39:55.140 --> 00:40:16.119 Dr. Sara: No, I'm doing. I'm gonna do this. II it. It buffers against feeling flustered. It buffers against comparisons and thinking, Oh, man! Well, that founders doing that? Well, yeah, that founders single without kids. And you know, 10 years younger. And you know, all these different. Okay? Like, so it buffers against all of these factors, I think. For me.

00:40:16.250 --> 00:40:22.350 Dr. Sara: The other pieces pivoting is so important. Oh, my gosh! You know, with my squarespace.

00:40:22.640 --> 00:40:34.760 Dr. Sara: crappy website like, talk about a pivot. I put it out there. One of my dear, dear colleagues who is in a very high position. It's like the Global

00:40:35.860 --> 00:40:51.450 Dr. Sara: Global director of Dei at a huge company was nice enough to look at my squarespace and she happens to be a woman of color, and she said, like, I'm not gonna pilot this even for free. I'm not piloting this with my team, because I felt completely other during it, and then looked at me and said.

00:40:51.590 --> 00:41:05.090 Dr. Sara: What was that like? I could imagine you feeling kind of hurt. And and I said, II do feel hurt. Yeah, it so I think here we go, vulnerability and connection and teamwork. I do feel hurt like III

00:41:05.090 --> 00:41:22.970 Dr. Sara: didn't even think about that. And and it was so powerful that she actually was my first beta. Her company was my first beta tester because we've stayed in touch, and I've been humbled and like, we're we gotta. We gotta be teammates in this because you know so much about this and

00:41:23.260 --> 00:41:35.829 Dr. Sara: so I think, like teamwork being open to what you don't know being open to pivot taking risks. Is a huge one, that is

00:41:35.860 --> 00:41:41.970 Dr. Sara: is scary. But staying the course, believing in yourself. What were some of the other ones

00:41:44.480 --> 00:41:50.620 Dr. Sara: finding a mentor who offers a complementary or different skill set to yours? Because, like

00:41:50.930 --> 00:41:55.989 Dr. Sara: I mean, II assumed that I could beta test and launch with without like formal

00:41:56.000 --> 00:42:18.899 Dr. Sara: marketing and certain like systemic procedures that are like critical. We think about like SEO and AI, and all that. And like, like, you really just need to, you really need to expand and have the other folks who have different sets of expertise support you and a mentor who says, Hey, here's a gap. You need this. You need this. You need this

00:42:19.150 --> 00:42:23.019 Mira Brancu: Some people might think so. You mentioned

00:42:23.090 --> 00:42:39.569 Mira Brancu: confidence. But then you started really going into like also having vulnerability, being humble, taking risks and especially around the vulnerability and humility, and being open to feedback, which you were incredibly open to feedback, and that's probably what it

00:42:39.700 --> 00:42:44.330 Mira Brancu: made your colleague find it so easy to give you feedback. Right?

00:42:44.480 --> 00:42:48.759 Mira Brancu: Some people might think that those things are at odds with confidence, because we

00:42:48.930 --> 00:42:55.559 Mira Brancu: have this perception that you're supposed to act confident, and when you act confident you're in vulnerable

00:42:55.580 --> 00:43:04.249 Mira Brancu: right. How do you? How do you see the 2 reconcile like I have confidence, and I'm vulnerable. I have confidence, and I'm humble.

00:43:04.350 --> 00:43:07.749 Dr. Sara: It's such a good question. And I actually was working on the

00:43:08.100 --> 00:43:16.740 Dr. Sara: a manager. There's 2 sets of skills in in the app, and part of them are manager skills and like, how to ask yourself

00:43:17.010 --> 00:43:35.940 Dr. Sara: in an algorithm fashion, like like, what questions factor into your decision to be vulnerable, and how and with whom, and and making an informed decision about whether it will undermine your power in some way, or whether it will actually increase your power or web, and whether power is even a important aspect of this.

00:43:37.440 --> 00:43:39.850 Dr. Sara: Honestly, I tend to think that like

00:43:40.630 --> 00:43:44.539 Dr. Sara: being vulnerable, but being vulnerable when about

00:43:44.940 --> 00:43:47.190 Dr. Sara: things that you

00:43:47.260 --> 00:44:06.640 Dr. Sara: don't feel torn up by torn up by is the way to go like. And I think about this as a therapist, too. Like if you're still working through some of your SHIT. Or as a manager, you are actually super insecure, and you're like being completely micromanaged by someone above you, and then you open up about this issue that you haven't fully tackled, like.

00:44:07.430 --> 00:44:19.180 Dr. Sara: I think that you are compromising your effectiveness, that I think like vulnerability in some ways, especially when it comes from a leader downward, or a leader with other leaders like does require like

00:44:19.950 --> 00:44:35.279 Dr. Sara: you, having already done some work on this, like, I think if I had not already done like a lot of work in like white racial identity. And looking at my biases and feeling comfortable, talking about issues related to

00:44:35.430 --> 00:44:42.370 Dr. Sara: racism and anti racist campaigns, and I think I would have been really thrown off by feedback

00:44:42.400 --> 00:44:58.229 Dr. Sara: by the feedback that I received from my colleague, and I wouldn't have been able to be vulnerable, and I shouldn't if I was vulnerable like. I think that would have really really discredited my groundedness in my kind of blue blow a hole in my kind of

00:44:58.630 --> 00:45:08.090 Dr. Sara: showcase, my ignorance, and it it wouldn't allow the other person to feel safe and trusting. I think it goes back to what you were saying, Mira, about how like.

00:45:08.100 --> 00:45:18.490 Dr. Sara: when we find a mentor who is treats us almost like a narcissistic appendage of them like it's not helpful for anyone and you can feel it right away.

00:45:18.760 --> 00:45:31.160 Mira Brancu: yeah, lots of juicy stuff there, and I'm going to pause us right there to go into another ad break. You're listening to the hard skills, and we will be right back in just a moment.

00:47:28.990 --> 00:47:38.049 Mira Brancu: Welcome back to the hard skills with me, Doctor Mira Branku, and with our guest, Doctor Sarah Rabinovich. We are talking about.

00:47:38.090 --> 00:47:51.280 Mira Brancu: Leaning into embracing your leadership identity. We've been exploring lots of different ways how to think about reconciling the difference between what we see out there the messages we get, how we see ourselves.

00:47:51.290 --> 00:47:55.090 Mira Brancu: how we approach this. And we really started digging into

00:47:55.440 --> 00:48:03.209 Mira Brancu: you know, confidence versus vulnerability. What does vulnerability look like. And as a final sort of

00:48:03.270 --> 00:48:25.320 Mira Brancu: focus here, what we haven't really touched on is we've talked a lot about how we show up and what we can offer and bring to others. We haven't really talked as much. Aside from the mentorship role about our social support, our network, our community and how that can help us lean into

00:48:25.360 --> 00:48:42.009 Mira Brancu: our growth areas, that vulnerability, that humility, the the ways in which we develop the confidence needed when we're just not sure. And so I'm curious to hear Dr. Sarah for you.

00:48:42.360 --> 00:48:54.470 Mira Brancu:  What has you know, been your experience with that aspect, the social support and community aspect when it comes to your own growth in your leadership journey.

00:48:56.670 --> 00:48:58.129 Mira Brancu: And you're on mute.

00:48:58.950 --> 00:49:03.849 Dr. Sara: That's that's a good question. I think it's such an important piece. I'm glad you bring it up.

00:49:06.490 --> 00:49:11.980 Dr. Sara: I think. Surround, I think. Well, so. Having participated in the towerscope,

00:49:12.000 --> 00:49:29.500 Dr. Sara: Beta beta test was that beta test or alpha test beta test. It was it was a beta test. Yeah, the leadership. Yeah. One of the things that stood out, I guess, like 2 full, like one where I think about how to move forward and needing the support of a group.

00:49:29.620 --> 00:49:36.249 Dr. Sara: I think about the importance of like having role models within the group and also having

00:49:36.280 --> 00:50:05.769 Dr. Sara: folks with different areas of expertise like what I really appreciate even within this. So the leadership academies broken into pods. There's healthcare, there's tech. There's education. Is there one more? Nope, that was it. And like even within the pods, there were folks with like vastly different areas of expertise. Like in the tech pod, for example, like, I'm very different person than someone who's been a high level manager, a variety of fortune, 500 companies and spearheaded, you know, and managed 300 people.

00:50:06.140 --> 00:50:25.549 Dr. Sara: so like. And I was the only one who's a trained psychologist, and could talk about burnout and talk about like working with negative thought patterns and imposter syndrome. And it was so helpful to have to kind of bounce ideas off in a group that felt truly safe to be vulnerable like these, weren't you know it's not folks who are

00:50:25.550 --> 00:50:54.860 Dr. Sara: even like thinking about working with you or hiring you, or you're hiring them or working with them like you're really, truly there to provide support, encouragement, and resources to one another, and when we level the playing field like that, and surround ourselves with like minded peers, who we respect greatly, who we can learn from and who we can be vulnerable with. As we explore our own leadership identities like there's no more ripe for the soil to really grow into whatever

00:50:54.920 --> 00:51:01.569 Dr. Sara: flower, plant vegetable. You want to become and I think it, it takes those 3 ingredients.

00:51:01.800 --> 00:51:13.770 Mira Brancu: Yeah, absolutely. And I just I'm recalling my own sort of areas of growth, as I've you know, navigated my own leadership journey and

00:51:13.820 --> 00:51:17.029 Mira Brancu: yes, it took mentorship, and that was critical.

00:51:17.120 --> 00:51:19.310 Mira Brancu: And

00:51:19.590 --> 00:51:23.189 Mira Brancu: Every time I surrounded myself with

00:51:23.260 --> 00:51:26.890 Mira Brancu:  You know people that I admired.

00:51:27.140 --> 00:51:40.629 Mira Brancu: especially women and leadership, because you don't see that as often right people who sort of represent your experience in some way and you can see yourself through them right?

00:51:41.300 --> 00:51:45.160 Mira Brancu: but especially like ones that

00:51:45.270 --> 00:51:52.640 Mira Brancu: were non-competitive. Right did not, did not feel a need to compete with me. But really we're

00:51:52.760 --> 00:52:12.060 Mira Brancu: supportive, challenging, pushing me just enough because they wanted. They were just as excited about my own growth. you know, as they were about their personal journey and mine. Right? And I was, and that makes such a difference as compared to

00:52:12.350 --> 00:52:22.079 Mira Brancu: when you find yourself surrounded by people who are naysayers. who are pessimists about your future, who, you know.

00:52:22.460 --> 00:52:26.010 Mira Brancu: give you messages that

00:52:26.220 --> 00:52:34.620 Mira Brancu: They are anxious or nervous for you. So you might as well not try who limit your risk taking because

00:52:34.850 --> 00:52:39.990 Mira Brancu: they haven't worked through their own. you know, experiences with that right?

00:52:41.580 --> 00:53:00.250 Dr. Sara: Yeah. And you can base subtle hostility like, I was thinking about like how you can really trust someone. And like setting. And like, we we when we decipher like who we're gonna trust. I do a lot of work with poly vagal theory, like when we decipher who we're gonna trust. We're literally looking at the these regions of the eyes and the mouth that

00:53:00.420 --> 00:53:27.259 Dr. Sara: convey either like a fake smile or a real smile, or yeah. And we know right away. If someone feels anxious for our success. If someone feels threatened by us, if someone feels if someone's saying one thing but their face is saying something else. We feel anxiety in our bodies, because there's discordance and listening to that gut feeling. That's part of what I learned from you, Mirren. This is like when you feel like when something feels off, something is off and listening to it.

00:53:28.790 --> 00:53:37.670 Mira Brancu: awesome. Okay. We talked about a lot of things today. What is the one thing that you would like people to take away from today

00:53:43.050 --> 00:53:44.850 people to know that like.

00:53:46.990 --> 00:53:57.980 Dr. Sara: it's okay to dream. And I don't know. I read a book a long time ago by a colleague Scott Provenance, that was called fail to learn, and all about this premise, that, like

00:53:58.040 --> 00:54:16.780 Dr. Sara: the only way we learn by failing over and over and taking those risks. Because if you if you don't take those risks. we never know what happens the other side, but also, like we miss out on so many learning experiences that become the foundation of of our work and

00:54:18.370 --> 00:54:26.090 Dr. Sara: take risks. Believe in yourself, and surround yourself with a mentor and a mentoring group of colleagues who

00:54:26.650 --> 00:54:32.839 Dr. Sara: in your gut you can tell truly support you from the inside out. And

00:54:33.340 --> 00:54:35.619 Dr. Sara: so you're not. You're not going at it alone.

00:54:35.650 --> 00:54:42.690 Mira Brancu: Yeah, that's fascinating a lot. And you're reminding me of. I remember sitting at a table

00:54:42.950 --> 00:54:45.749 Mira Brancu: and my mentor commenting.

00:54:45.830 --> 00:54:48.950 Mira Brancu: Something I hadn't seen in myself, which is.

00:54:49.060 --> 00:55:05.869 Mira Brancu: I see you as a very brave person. You're very brave, and I thought to myself, the only reason I'm brave is because you like allowed me and push me to be brave like that. You created the environment to be brave. So totally resonating with that message from both perspectives.

00:55:06.100 --> 00:55:09.989 Mira Brancu: If people want to learn more about your work, where can they go?

00:55:10.640 --> 00:55:16.080 Dr. Sara: My website, pacificmindful.com and put it in the chat

00:55:16.320 --> 00:55:18.220 Dr. Sara: so oops!

00:55:18.410 --> 00:55:21.230 Dr. Sara: If I if I click on the chat, will it go there? It's

00:55:21.360 --> 00:55:26.720 Mira Brancu: well, I people won't see it so you can just spell it out. Oh, Pacific!

00:55:26.750 --> 00:55:39.460 Dr. Sara: Like Pacific Ocean. And then, mindful, MNDF l.com and same for my Instagram handle, where I post a bunch of stuff. But check it out

00:55:39.470 --> 00:55:43.939 Mira Brancu: great, great, and do check it out because it is

00:55:44.120 --> 00:55:49.100 Mira Brancu: beautiful. Let me just quickly share my screen here

00:55:49.270 --> 00:55:53.880 Mira Brancu: and just show people if you're watching in the moment.

00:55:54.060 --> 00:56:16.529 Mira Brancu: Look at this I'm calling. Is this, breathe with us, it says on the front page. Come on in. It says on the front page, it's just the whole page is stunning, and it makes you feel already calm. There's lots of information here. So please do go Pacific, MNDF l.com. Okay.

00:56:16.610 --> 00:56:20.560 Mira Brancu: so we covered a lot today. If

00:56:20.860 --> 00:56:36.090 Mira Brancu: you would like to explore more about how we can help you with your leadership or team development services. You can check us out@gotowerscope.com. You could also learn there about the leadership. Academy, that Sarah went through that she described.

00:56:36.160 --> 00:56:40.819 Mira Brancu: So what is one thing that you take away audience?

00:56:41.140 --> 00:56:45.490 Mira Brancu: More importantly, what small one small change. You can implement this week

00:56:45.530 --> 00:56:47.450 Mira Brancu: based on what you learned from Sarah.

00:56:47.600 --> 00:56:53.059 Mira Brancu: Share it with us on Linkedin or Instagram. Sarah's big on both

00:56:53.190 --> 00:56:59.059 Mira Brancu: and find us there or@talkradio.nyc, so we could share you one.

00:56:59.420 --> 00:57:04.319 Mira Brancu: So we're also on Facebook, Instagram Twitter Twitch all over the place.

00:57:04.360 --> 00:57:11.540 Mira Brancu: Okay, you can find us there. You can also find us, after this, recorded on itunes and spotify as a podcast

00:57:11.570 --> 00:57:17.869 Mira Brancu: please like share, review, increase our visibility and reach. Thank you for talk radio

00:57:18.110 --> 00:57:31.339 Mira Brancu: for hosting. I'm Dr. Mirabaku, the host of the Hard Skills show and thank you for joining us today with our guest, Dr. Sarah Rabinovich. Have a great rest of your day wherever you're tuning in from bye all

download this episode of https://tabmaron.s3.amazonaws.com/talkinga/recordedshows/THS/20240123-THS-Embracing_Your_Leadership_How_to_Step_into_Your_Power_with_Mentorship_and_Actionable_Steps.mp3

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