Experiences build up over a lifetime.
Being bullied, made fun of, abused, or just plain harassed.
They all affect us in ways we don't realize.
And over the course of time they cause a shift inside of us.
It is a shift inside our nervous system.
Our bodies learn not to feel safe.
Because we weren't.
When we suffer enough, and we can no longer stand the pain, we seek help.
Whether it is professional help or some kind of alternative help, we just know we need to do sometime.
For we can no longer live the way we have been living for many years or perhaps decades.
We seek healing, therapy, or something more extreme.
Sometimes the treatments we seek help quite a bit.
And sometimes not.
One that is easy to overlook.
For when we come together in a safe, intimate space with an open hearted community, our nervous system can respond quite profoundly.
When we are in a group that supports being vulnerable with each other, and we share our own traumas, something magical happens.
As we hear others share their pain and their tragedies, we no longer feel so alone.
We can relate to others and they can relate to us.
And in those intimate and vulnerable moments, we suddenly feel safe.
Safe to express ourselves.
Or safe enough to connect to others without being defensive.
An accepting and support group that creates this kind of space, immediately helps us to release the feeling that we are not safe.
It gives our nervous system a positive experience to counteract the negative ones.
Whereas when we seek individual treatment on our own, we do have a sense of community or safety in the same way.
Yes, we may find healing that way.
This may not be true for everyone who is suffering, but it is true more often than we realize.
It is not a magic bullet.
So when we struggle with pain of our past traumas, sometime the best help we can find is in the community we feel safest in.
Do you have an accepting community that you feel safe enough to share your pain with?
If not, can you find one?
~ Sam Liebowitz, The Conscious Consultant
Host of The Conscious Consultant Hour