EPISODE SUMMARY:
This week, on The Conscious Consultant Hour, Sam welcomes Bestselling Author, Coach, and Visibility Expert, Cindy J. Holbrook.
Cindy, known as The Visibility Wiz, guides coaches, speakers, and authors to thrive as they go up the ladder from being the best-kept secret to trusted and in-demand expert.
Clients benefit from her empowering systems and strategies that empower you to step into who you are with outrageous confidence, set and maintain boundaries with clients and personal relationships, as you create visibility strategies that align with your personality and that of your clients, all while building a fun and profitable business.
Cindy’s been featured on Huffington Post Live, Women’s Speaker Association TV, Every Day Women TV, eHarmony, Prevention, and a guest on numerous podcasts and radio shows.
She is the best-selling author of Overcoming Dark Family Secrets: Journey from Worthless to Worthy, her story of overcoming a traumatic past to become a successful businesswoman.
Join Sam and Cindy as they discuss the importance of overcoming our traumas so we can feel worthy enough to have the visibility we deserve.
https://amzn.to/3LTmy4i
https://www.cindyjholbrook.com/
00:00:35.550 --> 00:00:50.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Good afternoon. Good evening. Good morning. Wherever you're tuning in from welcome to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. I am very, very pleased that you are all here with me today.
00:00:50.080 --> 00:01:02.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: streaming, of course, from my satellite studio here in San Diego switch the camera around a little bit trying to get a little bit better sound from the microphone so hopefully it's a little bit better than last week.
00:01:02.080 --> 00:01:15.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'm so glad you're all here with me today. I've got a wonderful guest that i'll be bringing on in just a moment. But first, of course, we have our little section from my book
00:01:15.350 --> 00:01:16.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: everyday Awakening.
00:01:17.600 --> 00:01:26.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and let's get started. And yeah, and then i'll bring on my guess. So today's section is entitled
00:01:27.190 --> 00:01:36.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The Future calls us forth with our visions. Sometimes we feel a pull in one direction or another.
00:01:36.800 --> 00:01:40.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A certain project comes to mind, and we feel drawn toward it.
00:01:41.110 --> 00:01:45.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The vision is so compelling that we can't stop thinking about it.
00:01:46.780 --> 00:01:57.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This is a sign that the future is calling to us. It is calling to us to fulfill a destiny. It is calling to us to walk a certain path
00:01:58.340 --> 00:02:02.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it calls to our soul to be who we are becoming.
00:02:04.120 --> 00:02:12.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: When the future reaches back into the past. It is sending a signal. It is providing a lighted path for us to follow.
00:02:13.050 --> 00:02:17.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It already knows where we will end up and is guiding us there.
00:02:18.310 --> 00:02:27.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This is not about fate. but about possibilities. Deep in our core. We know this is where we are to go.
00:02:27.670 --> 00:02:31.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Our spirit is whispering to us to awaken
00:02:31.760 --> 00:02:35.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to bring our joy forward into the present.
00:02:36.490 --> 00:02:45.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That we have a vision does not mean everything will go smoothly, or that there won't be great challenges along the way.
00:02:45.530 --> 00:02:52.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yet when we are on the path of our spirits calling. there is a grace about it.
00:02:53.020 --> 00:02:55.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There is a light that surrounds it.
00:02:56.290 --> 00:03:07.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There is a peacefulness inside of us as we tread it not. Everyone will answer the call from the future. Not everyone will fulfill their vision.
00:03:08.520 --> 00:03:15.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yet if more people at least walk the path of a vision, regardless of where
00:03:15.870 --> 00:03:22.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: theirs leads them. Then everyone will realize it is okay to dream
00:03:22.110 --> 00:03:24.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and follow a soul's calling
00:03:25.650 --> 00:03:40.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: in creating from a vision our example can serve as a light for others who feel drawn to their own vision. What a world we would be in if we all answered that call.
00:03:41.120 --> 00:03:48.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Is there a vision calling you forward? Do you have a vision that you are burning to fulfill?
00:03:49.550 --> 00:04:04.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I love this section. I wrote this. I don't know how many years ago. but I remember I wrote it after just hearing that one concept I didn't necessarily have all the details. But it was just
00:04:04.560 --> 00:04:15.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this idea that when we get some kind of a vision, a dream, or or something in our imagination
00:04:15.600 --> 00:04:20.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: about our future, and and where to go.
00:04:21.570 --> 00:04:26.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that it's actually our so calling us from the future
00:04:27.310 --> 00:04:31.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to fulfill this vision, this dream, this this idea.
00:04:33.250 --> 00:04:40.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and just the idea of it sort of struck me very deeply. I felt a certain truth to it.
00:04:41.750 --> 00:04:50.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it's so interesting because. since I've written this, I I believe in this, probably more than when I wrote when I wrote this.
00:04:52.580 --> 00:05:02.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because I've seen it over and over again in many different people, and and they wouldn't necessarily phrase it the way of raising it here in my book.
00:05:04.040 --> 00:05:07.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But it's the idea that just if we have a dream.
00:05:08.290 --> 00:05:11.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if if there's something that calls to you
00:05:11.740 --> 00:05:14.630 whether it calls you from a young age
00:05:15.500 --> 00:05:19.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: as a as a teenager, as a young adult, as a mature adult.
00:05:20.060 --> 00:05:21.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It doesn't really matter
00:05:22.610 --> 00:05:28.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if it's calling to you, it's calling to you. If the seed has been planted.
00:05:28.630 --> 00:05:31.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it has been planted for a reason
00:05:31.500 --> 00:05:37.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you would not have the vision. The dream the idea.
00:05:37.900 --> 00:05:40.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if it wasn't yours to do something with.
00:05:43.360 --> 00:05:45.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and sometimes I see people and
00:05:45.950 --> 00:05:57.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A and it I I just want to kind of shake them awake because they're like. Oh, I can never do that. Oh, it's just a crazy idea! Oh, I I I don't understand.
00:05:57.660 --> 00:06:03.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Somebody else is already doing something like this. I'm like you're missing the point.
00:06:03.760 --> 00:06:08.150 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It doesn't matter if someone else is doing something like it.
00:06:08.470 --> 00:06:10.090 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Doesn't matter
00:06:10.150 --> 00:06:14.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if if you you can't see how to accomplish it.
00:06:15.410 --> 00:06:20.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Life will show us how the universe will bring us, the how
00:06:21.280 --> 00:06:24.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our job is to focus on the what
00:06:26.210 --> 00:06:28.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and when that, what drops in.
00:06:29.420 --> 00:06:47.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And maybe it happens when you're meditating. Maybe it happens when you're sleeping. Maybe it happens when you're in that kind of in between state between being asleep and being awake, that liminal state where reality feels a little bendable.
00:06:47.390 --> 00:06:56.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And then suddenly, you have this vision of something. Hmm. That's something to pay attention to. I'm. Sure.
00:06:56.800 --> 00:07:08.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know we hear stories of people like George Lucas, who had this idea for Star Wars when he was a a kid in his bedroom and coming up with these ideas.
00:07:10.420 --> 00:07:20.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: did he stop and go? Well, how am I going to create this fantastical universe? You know it? It'll look cheesy, and the special effects these days. Isn't that good. No.
00:07:21.650 --> 00:07:24.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it just it was there in his heart.
00:07:25.100 --> 00:07:27.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and he just kept looking for
00:07:28.080 --> 00:07:32.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: opportunity to bring that dream into reality.
00:07:32.820 --> 00:07:34.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and how much
00:07:34.890 --> 00:07:38.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: has it enriched our lives that he has?
00:07:41.450 --> 00:07:46.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So remember our visions, our dreams. They're not just for us.
00:07:47.960 --> 00:07:59.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: pay for everyone. And if the universe gave you a particular dream, a particular vision. Well, then. there's a reason for that.
00:08:00.620 --> 00:08:03.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and perhaps we need to pay attention to that.
00:08:04.230 --> 00:08:14.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And perhaps there is something for us to do with that don't worry about the how focus on the what.
00:08:15.040 --> 00:08:21.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and see where it leads you, and sometimes where it leads you is not exactly what the vision is.
00:08:21.770 --> 00:08:26.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we lead you with something completely different.
00:08:26.350 --> 00:08:30.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but you never would have gotten there had you not followed the vision in the first place.
00:08:31.620 --> 00:08:39.150 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: yeah, I often say to people I never would have imagined doing what i'm doing today. 2030 years ago.
00:08:43.230 --> 00:08:46.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It it! It's one of those things where you just.
00:08:47.850 --> 00:08:53.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if you just follow what life is calling to you.
00:08:53.780 --> 00:08:55.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you can be amazed
00:08:56.220 --> 00:09:09.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: at where that path leads to where that journey takes you, and sometimes it's not even about the destination. Most of the time it isn't it's more about the journey. It's about. Who do you become in the process?
00:09:11.190 --> 00:09:20.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: How do you learn to trust? How do you grow? How do you embody this amazing vision that life has given you.
00:09:21.960 --> 00:09:32.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So this week's homework. Should you choose to accept it is, let's take a look at what are those dreams? What if those visions that you've had throughout your life.
00:09:33.040 --> 00:09:44.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and which one do you feel still calls to you deep inside. still makes you feel that this is something I really need to pursue.
00:09:44.810 --> 00:09:46.400 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Don't worry about the how
00:09:46.780 --> 00:09:52.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: start talking to people about it. Start following it Just just this the first step.
00:09:52.370 --> 00:09:55.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Just pay attention to one step at a time.
00:09:55.670 --> 00:10:00.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Don't worry about the big things one step at a time and see where it leads you.
00:10:00.800 --> 00:10:10.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: All right. I hope you liked it. That is the section of my book called the Future, called Fourth, calls us forth with our visions.
00:10:10.230 --> 00:10:27.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Of course it's from my book every day awakening which you can find it every day. Awakening book.com, which is basically just the Amazon listing. And if you're like me and you like to frequent the independent bookstores. Just tell them to order it every day, awakening by Sam Lee Woods.
00:10:27.840 --> 00:10:34.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Any bookstore can get it. We're in a major distributor, so i'm always big on supporting those small independence scores.
00:10:35.950 --> 00:10:40.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: All right. So now it is my extreme pleasure
00:10:40.430 --> 00:10:42.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to welcome to our show
00:10:44.420 --> 00:10:52.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: best-selling author coach and visibility expert Cindy Holbrook Cindy, known as the visibility whiz
00:10:53.060 --> 00:11:03.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: guides, coaches, speakers, and offers authors to thrive as they go up the ladder from being the best kept secret to trusted and in demand expert
00:11:04.100 --> 00:11:23.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: clients benefit from her empowering systems and strategies that empower you to step into who you are, with outrageous confidence set and maintain boundaries with clients and personal relationships. As you create visibility strategies that align with your personality and that of your clients
00:11:23.040 --> 00:11:41.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: all while building a fun and profitable business. Cindy's been featured on Huffington Post Live Women Speakers Association, TV Everyday Women, TV Eharmony Prevention, and has been a guest on numerous podcasts and radio shows and she's the best selling author of
00:11:41.610 --> 00:11:44.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: overcoming Dark Family Secrets
00:11:44.490 --> 00:12:01.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Journey from the Journey from Worthlessness to worthy the story of overcoming a traumatic past and becoming a successful businesswoman. Welcome to the conscious consultant hours. Sunday. Oh, thank you, Sam. It's my pleasure. I'm happy to be here. It's. It's wonderful to have you here.
00:12:01.600 --> 00:12:09.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And yeah, we we're calling this episode from worthless to worthy in honor of your book. Because I think that's something that
00:12:09.340 --> 00:12:13.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a lot of people can resonate with that we've all
00:12:13.690 --> 00:12:22.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: felt unworthy in some respect. We've all felt not good enough. Who am I? And and that journey
00:12:22.310 --> 00:12:28.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: from feeling that Who Who am I to want this to do this, to have this
00:12:28.330 --> 00:12:48.020 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: to becoming that person who it's like, yeah, I can do this. Yeah, I I Not only can I do it. I deserve this like that's an amazing journey. Isn't it it it is. And over the years I I loved your part of your book, but over the years I have completely learned to trust my journey.
00:12:48.020 --> 00:13:03.180 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: even though there's times that I don't like what's happening on it. I know that it's all for my good at the end that it's teaching me valuable lessons to move forward and share my gifts with the world.
00:13:04.640 --> 00:13:14.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know. Let's let's i'm gonna take our first break when we come back. I always like to give my own it a little bit of context to what we're gonna talk about for the day, so i'd like to kind of start with.
00:13:15.170 --> 00:13:16.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know.
00:13:17.140 --> 00:13:28.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know sort of where you started off in life. How did you come to write the book. And how did you really come to focus on this area of visibility and and helping people to
00:13:28.630 --> 00:13:33.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: really become like an in demand. Expert. Okay.
00:13:34.020 --> 00:13:34.890 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Okay.
00:13:35.310 --> 00:13:36.460 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: awesome.
00:13:37.090 --> 00:13:57.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Very good. So everyone please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consult now are awakening humanity. We do this every Thursday. 12 noon to one Pm. Eastern time right here and talk radio, dot Nyc. And on Kmt. And Palm Springs, California, 10 am. On Wednesdays, and we will be right back with our guests since the whole group in just a moment.
00:14:02.160 --> 00:14:08.380 Okay. Okay. you?
00:14:19.410 --> 00:14:30.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well, just we had a little bit of a mishap there. I'm sure my engineer will take care of that in a moment. All right, Cindy. So let's get started.
00:14:34.900 --> 00:14:47.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You Well, let's start off like like, Where Where did you start in life. W. What what were you doing like when you got out of school? You know what? What was your vision when you were a kid growing up of what you wanted to do.
00:14:47.900 --> 00:15:06.250 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Well, you know, to even per se the title of my book overcoming dark family secrets. I was not in any way raised to leave it to be her home. There is a massive abuse, so I learned at a very early age. It's what I call the lies. We're led to believe, from having an abuse of father
00:15:06.250 --> 00:15:20.630 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: physically, sexually, mentally growing up. I knew it was like I lived in 2 different houses. If my Dad was home. There is this set of roles, but I had a very loving support of mother, who
00:15:20.630 --> 00:15:27.580 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I dedicated my book to. She is the reason I am who I am. She, I think.
00:15:27.580 --> 00:15:49.690 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: in her own way. She knew that she was a victim. She knew that the life that we led as a family wasn't right, so she always encouraged me, and always told me I could be whatever I wanted to be. I could do whatever I wanted to. She always told me, Don't ever depend upon a man to support you, which you know back in the day. That's what women did. So she really tried to
00:15:49.690 --> 00:16:07.220 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: constantly told me positive stories. She would read like Wayne Dyer to me, you know, just always trying to uplift me, which really, you know, instilled. Let's say you know the the part of me that maybe believed in myself. However.
00:16:07.620 --> 00:16:24.310 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: from learning that I had to be a certain way, and I had to act a certain way to please other people around me. I really didn't think or realize 100 that I had a choice in my life. So I led my life
00:16:24.310 --> 00:16:30.820 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: based on what other people, what I thought other people wanted me to be, or what they who they told me to be.
00:16:30.950 --> 00:16:42.900 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: So, right after high school I got married to my first husband at the age of 18, who was a lot like my father, minus the sexual abuse. So I went from just controlling to more controlling and
00:16:42.900 --> 00:17:00.350 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and just, you know there's a lot of abuse, and it it's very interesting to me. I look back, and some of the things that my ex husband did to our children. I'm appalled at, and it took a while for me to forgive myself for that, because I wasn't in a place to realize
00:17:00.350 --> 00:17:07.150 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: that's what was happening was wrong, because to me it was still normal. It was just a normal life that
00:17:07.380 --> 00:17:30.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I i'm curious because the abuse and dysfunctional families are so common. Did you know anyone else when you were a kid who was kind of going through the same thing, or was every at that time, like everyone, kept it so tight and so secretive that that no like it's it's kind of like people knew there were things going on, but nobody talked about it, or
00:17:30.550 --> 00:17:50.170 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: you know i'm not a 100 for sure. I will say that now i'm 63. So I was born 1959 in the sixties. Nobody but nobody talked about anything, and the very first national child abuse law, you know when that took place 1974.
00:17:50.250 --> 00:18:06.450 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Wow! So there wasn't even child of a national child abuse law when I was growing up so it it I just believed. I know. I believe, that what was happening in my house was normal, and it happened in everybody's household, but nobody never talked about it.
00:18:06.660 --> 00:18:21.800 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: My brother got the worst of the beatings, and I found his best friend when from when they were younger on Facebook, and him and I have spoken a lot, and my brother had led a very tragic life.
00:18:21.850 --> 00:18:22.640 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: But
00:18:23.500 --> 00:18:42.780 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: but he would, he said he realized back then how hard and how mean and how bad my father was towards my brother. So obviously. Some people noticed it, but nobody talked to. But he was a kid himself, you know, but he he could see the difference in his family versus our family.
00:18:42.780 --> 00:19:00.280 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and he said he always felt, and he always prayed for my brother because of so much that happened in there. So it's hard now. I would hope today. It's one of the reasons why I decided to try. My book is, I hope, today that
00:19:00.660 --> 00:19:03.350 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: people realize that they will tell.
00:19:03.420 --> 00:19:09.080 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: My daughter was one of my editors of my book, and she said, Mom, it's so sad.
00:19:09.530 --> 00:19:14.340 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: How many people you reached out to, and how many people
00:19:14.710 --> 00:19:37.690 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: didn't have your back. How many people just did not support you as you were growing up with things that happened so. And I think that part of it was the time. Yeah. So so what brought you to write the book? I mean, most people don't look forward, you know. Don't decide to write a book about. You know their dark family sequence, you know. That's a lot to to sort of
00:19:37.690 --> 00:19:41.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just to write it. Relive it, Go through it again.
00:19:41.940 --> 00:19:58.160 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: What was it that made you say, like I have to write a book about this, and you know I was pretty quiet about my life, and there's people that knew about my life like one on one that I had spoken to I was at, and a bill barren event, the big shift in 2,016,
00:19:58.400 --> 00:20:12.260 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and on the last day of the event he cleared all the tables out of the room and all the chairs and hand it. But he line up on one side, and the attendance was close to 900, he said, If I make a statement.
00:20:12.280 --> 00:20:26.800 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and it's true for you, take a step forward if it's not true, stay where you are. And so naturally the point of this is like we've all experienced crap on our life right? Nobody stayed on the wall by the end of the session, but in the middle of it I started sobbing.
00:20:27.210 --> 00:20:42.760 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: This gentleman, his name was Era is Eric, and he's about 7 foot tall, came up to me and said, Can I hug you? And then I completely lost it? I you know I I just could not stop sobbing, and he sort of became my security blanket
00:20:42.760 --> 00:20:59.720 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: at the end, when Bill Barron said, hey, does anybody want to share? We were in the back, and I sort of nudged Derek and said, I want to speak. And so he raised his hand. I never would have been seen him being so tall. He was seen. So Bell Baron called on him, and he went up on stage with me
00:20:59.720 --> 00:21:05.030 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: because he was my security blanket, because I was just a basket case.
00:21:05.040 --> 00:21:13.100 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I started out by saying it dawned on me. I've been playing small on my business because I was afraid of big, strong men.
00:21:13.450 --> 00:21:20.130 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and the audience started laughing, and I said, You know, I said, if
00:21:20.210 --> 00:21:30.540 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and then I said, when Eric came and asked me if he could hug me, something inside of me broke. I do realize something inside of my heel now, but I did say grow.
00:21:30.710 --> 00:21:46.250 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I said, You see, I was sexually, physically, mentally abused by my father growing up. I was also sexually abused by 2 family friends. At age 18 I got married to my, to my first husband, a man much like my father, minus the sexual abuse.
00:21:46.460 --> 00:21:56.570 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and around this time a a gentleman I had lunch with that was at my lunch table, felt inspired to get up and give me a hug.
00:21:56.980 --> 00:22:00.450 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and you know, whenever you feel inspired to do something.
00:22:00.450 --> 00:22:27.850 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I tell you. But you need to do it because there's a reason. So he got up, and he hugged me, and within 30 s, through, like 70 men surrounding me with pure, unconditional love. This was a huge healing moment for me, and had, I thought for a second because I had never shared my story publicly; and even though I didn't go into detail, I just shared like with 900 people when it happened. Right so
00:22:27.850 --> 00:22:39.250 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: afterwards everybody men and women alike, came up to me and said, oh, my God, your stories my story, you know you talking up there and having the men's round you, just healed my soul.
00:22:39.260 --> 00:22:51.830 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I Your story helps me to understand my wife, my mother, my sister, and men and women both, were coming to me with all these things, and it was at that moment I decided to write my book.
00:22:52.100 --> 00:22:54.970 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: However, I wasn't ready to write it.
00:22:55.060 --> 00:23:07.610 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I look back at my first draft back in 2,016. It's not what I wound up with it. If I would, to split that out, it would have not had been the healing book that I wanted it to be.
00:23:07.980 --> 00:23:10.740 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: If you've ever read in a book about abuse
00:23:10.770 --> 00:23:25.020 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: 99.9 9 of them, and when the abuse ends, but that's not the end. Of the story. So in my book the first section is about the abuse I endured, and the lies that I
00:23:25.020 --> 00:23:44.140 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: it was taught to believe about myself in the world around me. The second half of the book is my healing; that even though my healing isn't all happy because healing it's not a fun thing it. But I go through my healing, and with each chapter of my healing. In the second part I have what I call a key to worthiness.
00:23:44.210 --> 00:23:53.500 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: And so these are just different exercises that I did. That helped me to heal that hopefully can help other people heal some aspect of their life.
00:23:53.980 --> 00:24:04.100 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I would like to. I start in the beginning of the book. Whenever I talk my forward, I state number one. We, our logical brains, raped trauma.
00:24:04.360 --> 00:24:17.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: but our bodies in our hearts don't rate it. So people hear about my trauma, and they're thinking. Oh, my God, man, you had a 10 plus trauma life. But I think you know, traumatized as a child. I was used to it.
00:24:17.270 --> 00:24:24.530 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and whenever you're used to something, you don't realize what's going on. It's just normal for you. So
00:24:24.880 --> 00:24:28.840 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: So it it really wasn't like that. But
00:24:29.020 --> 00:24:42.250 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: something can happen to somebody, just one statement somebody says, or one thing can occur in your You might rate logically this trauma to be a one, but I guarantee you it's affected you.
00:24:42.250 --> 00:24:49.340 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: your body and your beliefs every bit as much as my 10 did so. Don't rage, trauma.
00:24:49.340 --> 00:25:02.500 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: You're like in 2,015, my son, he's an adult. He broke his neck, and I was living with him, taking care of him. He healed 100, and it was actually the best thing that ever happened to him, and lots of good things came out of that
00:25:02.500 --> 00:25:09.390 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: going along with trusting your journey. But he I was talking to a client, and she was
00:25:09.560 --> 00:25:25.440 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: totally just going crazy because her 5 year old son had to be put to sleep and have dental surgery, and so she's like, really, you know, anxious telling me about all this. She just sort of stopped at, and i'm so sorry I had no right to complain whenever your son broke his neck.
00:25:25.490 --> 00:25:46.550 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I said, No, no, the 2 don't equate, I promise my trauma me taking her, my son, that i'm concerned about my son. But just because in your head your my son's injuries are worse than what's going on with your son. It doesn't mean that you're not feeling the same exact thing. I'm feeling, and mine's not worse than yours. Yours isn't worse than mine. It's just
00:25:46.620 --> 00:25:54.510 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: stuff that we all have to deal with in life. So i'm curious when you came out with the book. What was the reaction from your family?
00:25:55.500 --> 00:26:13.400 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Most of my family is dead that the the person that I was concerned the most with with my sister. I never would have wrote my book without my sister's blessing, because my stories, her story, I mean our thoughts. Everything that happened to us were so identical. It was bizarre.
00:26:13.430 --> 00:26:31.120 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: It's it's bizarre to me to think, you know just. But my sister is another woman in my life who really brought me up to believe in myself. She has always been my biggest supporter. From the time I was very little, and talking about like different rates of trauma.
00:26:31.300 --> 00:26:44.730 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Now I love to write my entire life. When I was in 6 years old I had the chicken pox, and I wrote a 2 page story, and my mom thought it was so good for a 6 year old that she put it in her little brown box and saved it.
00:26:45.060 --> 00:26:51.880 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: In the sixth grade I wrote a 50 page story, and my sister, I remember she was like literally waiting for me to
00:26:51.880 --> 00:27:17.200 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: to finish a page so she could read it right. So i'm writing, she's reading, i'm writing. She's reading. My sister loved this book, but I, my teacher, loved this book, and she printed it out, put it in the school library, and sent it, and gave it all the sixth graders, and sent it to a publisher friend of hers. The publisher wrote me a letter telling me that I was a gifted writer, and I would have find success at an early age.
00:27:17.200 --> 00:27:19.770 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: long as I did not get discouraged.
00:27:19.980 --> 00:27:32.090 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: so my mom also put that down letter in her brown box. It's really sad, because after she died. I lost both of these things. She had them until she died, and then I lost them somehow. But
00:27:32.730 --> 00:27:41.820 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: anyways, I do have the 50 page book that I had written, though, and so I was always writing. I was writing poems and
00:27:41.870 --> 00:27:48.370 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: tenth grade. I had this teacher, who was a published author in a creative writing class, and he was the hardest graded.
00:27:48.380 --> 00:27:53.840 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: greater ever. And I am the only person that I know that ever got an a on a
00:27:54.600 --> 00:27:59.730 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: on in his class, so I had a lot of proof that I was a good writer.
00:27:59.730 --> 00:28:19.440 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Just before I got married I wrote a poem I was going to read to my husband at our wedding. My dad read this poem and said you should not read this poem. If you read this poem, you're going to be a laughingstock. A matter of fact, you should never let anybody read anything you write, because if you do, you will be a laughing stock.
00:28:19.440 --> 00:28:38.420 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: hey? I didn't want to be a lacking stock. So so 20 years later, when I divorced my first husband, I threw away 5 books i'd written that nobody never read that one piece. Whenever I said one thing that somebody tells you can traumatize you and screw you up more than
00:28:38.420 --> 00:28:43.200 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: all the crap that I went through that screwed me up a lot because it it
00:28:43.970 --> 00:28:57.360 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I didn't. I didn't want to be a laughing stock, so I wouldn't share my writing all these books that I wrote, and through a way, you know just a lot that I had done in the past, because I didn't feel comfortable enough. And
00:28:57.480 --> 00:29:12.510 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and you know, who knows? Had I not believed the line, my father told me, I could have achieved successive writing and a much earlier age. Wonderful. Okay, so we're gonna take our next break. And when we come back i'd like to talk about.
00:29:12.540 --> 00:29:14.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So how did you go from this
00:29:15.050 --> 00:29:29.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: person who is afraid and and traumatized into someone who actually coaches people and becoming a visibility. Experts kind of like almost the extreme opposite. Right like when you're view you. You kind of want to hide. You don't want anyone to see you, and now you're out there
00:29:29.610 --> 00:29:48.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: kind of helping people to be seen more than anything else. So. But let's let's get into that when we come back. Okay, awesome, Cindy. Thanks so much. So everybody. Please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consult now are awakening humanity. We do this every Thursday. 12 noon to one Pm. Eastern right here and talk radio down in Myc. And we'll be right back
00:29:48.550 --> 00:29:51.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with our guest, Cindy over in just a moment.
00:29:52.990 --> 00:30:07.300 Are you passionate about the conversation around racism? Hi! I'm Reverend Dr. Tlc. Host of the Dismantle racism show which airs every Thursday at 11 a. M. Eastern on talk radio, Dot Nyc
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00:30:22.310 --> 00:30:50.270 www.TalkRadio.nyc: In the moment world you may have many unanswered questions. Regarding your health. Are you looking to live a healthier lifestyle? Do you have a desire to learn more about mental health, and enhance your quality of life? Or do you just want to participate in self-understanding and awareness. I'm. Frank R. Harrison, host of Frank about health and each Thursday. I will tackle these questions and work to enlighten you. Tune in every Thursday 5 P. M. On talk radio and Nyc. And I will be frank about help to advocate for all of us.
00:30:55.560 --> 00:31:19.660 Hey, everybody! It's Tommy. Gee, the nonprofit sector connector coming at you from my attic each week here on talk radio and Nyc: I hosted program for lambda game focus non-profits in cocktails each and every day, and it's my focus to help them amplify their message and tell their story. Listen each week at 10 a. M. Eastern standard time until 11. A. M. Is from standing time right here on talk radio, Dot: Nyc.
00:31:20.680 --> 00:31:31.070 You're listening to talk radio and Yc: at Www: talk radio and livec. Now broadcasting hours a day.
00:31:31.370 --> 00:31:32.600 you
00:31:41.050 --> 00:31:47.230 you okay. you
00:31:55.820 --> 00:32:13.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and welcome back to the conscious, consulting our awakening humanity. I just want to give a quick shout out to our listeners around the globe. I was taking a quick look on the back end, and we've got listeners in Argentina, Spain, Brazil, Mexico, Germany, France.
00:32:13.520 --> 00:32:16.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oh, Geez Vietnam.
00:32:16.640 --> 00:32:35.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Turkey. So one of the joys of of doing these shows online is really reaching people around the globe. And so I really appreciate people tuning in from all over the world. Thank you for tuning in hope you're enjoying the show. So, so, Cindy, we we talked about.
00:32:35.420 --> 00:32:40.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know basically, you you coming out with your story kind of dealing with the trauma?
00:32:40.580 --> 00:32:53.530 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: When did you decide to be a coach and help other people? Because that's not necessarily a profession that most people take.
00:32:53.550 --> 00:32:59.010 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: When I was 35 I started working in social services.
00:32:59.410 --> 00:33:04.810 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and my boss I call her my first coach and my first mentor.
00:33:04.830 --> 00:33:18.320 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I used to always tell her nobody could ever take the place of my mother. But you're the next best thing. This is how much I valued this woman, and her name is Carol. And so I was talking to her, and she goes. Cindy.
00:33:18.360 --> 00:33:20.310 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: your life is your choice.
00:33:21.030 --> 00:33:35.050 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I looked at her, and I told her you're crazy. Nobody on earth ever living would have ever wanted the life that i'm living right now. I'm depressed. I'm suicidal. My 14 year old daughter is getting involved in gangs.
00:33:35.050 --> 00:33:51.770 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: My a husband is involved with another woman. I've had like 8 deaths in my immediate family in the past 2 years. Nobody but nobody, but nobody would choose this life right, nobody, and and she just kept on. She's like No, your life is your choice.
00:33:52.080 --> 00:33:55.560 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: She started. She bought me Tony Robbins tapes.
00:33:55.590 --> 00:34:03.180 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and told me to listen to them. She told me books to read. She she began my self improvement journey.
00:34:03.270 --> 00:34:22.280 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: She was my light, and you know everybody. You have a gift, and regardless of your coach, or whatever you know, I would not be here for isn't for her, because she's the one that guided me, and she used to ask me not that I knew what I was doing at the time, but she she to get me to envision my life without my husband.
00:34:22.840 --> 00:34:36.710 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I was so I knew how to be the boss's wife, as I always call. I knew how to be the boss's wife. I knew what to say, how to dress, how to act, but I had that downpad. but it was like, Who am I if i'm not Earl's wife.
00:34:36.880 --> 00:34:48.170 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: because I had been trained so long to be that. And so through all this, through all of the books that she told me in her coaching, and her envisioned me. Because
00:34:48.170 --> 00:35:05.260 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: or all your stories yell at me. I'm he made like 80 K. And I made like 15 or 20 K. And he my! He's always say he's gonna leave me in the kids penniless, and I had. My kids were used to his income. How am I going to raise him off my income? Right? So I was terrified of that.
00:35:05.260 --> 00:35:23.270 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and you know. But you would go. You know. How would you support your kids? What would you do? Where would you live? Who would fix your cars, you know, Just got me to start thinking and really visualizing a life without Earl, and I didn't realize that she was doing that. But
00:35:23.510 --> 00:35:30.810 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: but it was through her love, her support, her guide telling me continuously, telling me that my life is my choice.
00:35:30.810 --> 00:35:45.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and it took me a while to really grasp that that, hey? I could not change the fact that Earl did not love me, but I could change how I thought about it I could not change the fact that my father abused to me, but I could rewrite it.
00:35:45.250 --> 00:35:55.880 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and when you rewrite it you're not rewriting it to where it never happened. You're rewriting it to where you're in power, and not them.
00:35:56.170 --> 00:36:13.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It it's so funny, because so many times I talk to people, and I kind of bring up this idea of like we create our life, and they like, what are you talking about? I would never create a life like this, and they they start talking from sort of the the intellectual of like kind of thing, and they don't get that.
00:36:13.730 --> 00:36:31.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's it's about being a creator and not a victim. And yeah, we may not have any control over what happens to us, but we have 100% control over how we respond and how we frame what happens to us, and whether we use it to build this up, or we just allow it to tear us down.
00:36:31.730 --> 00:36:44.850 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Exactly. And that that was like the beginning, and you know it took years and talking like I knew nothing about the law of attraction back then, and it's very. I didn't even
00:36:45.010 --> 00:36:46.710 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: here that term
00:36:48.980 --> 00:37:01.590 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: to where I grasped it consciously until the secret came out. But then I realized all the Brian Tracy tapes that I've been listening to for years. He mentions a lot of attraction, so I thought that was funny, because that
00:37:01.610 --> 00:37:08.020 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: but during my hell years, as I call them, I used to always tell my best friend about my perfect demand.
00:37:08.280 --> 00:37:12.760 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and it was never about looks or anything like that. It was all about traits.
00:37:13.090 --> 00:37:32.950 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: It was he was fun. He was smart, he liked to joke he didn't see black and white, my ex-husband only seen black and white, and I really like the broad to me the world is gray. It's not black, and white. And so I had all these things you know about my perfect man. But he sort of kept me saying, as I was going through everything, just
00:37:32.950 --> 00:37:39.550 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: imagining and visualizing this 6 months after I got the cards to leave my excess, when I met my current husband.
00:37:39.660 --> 00:37:46.780 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and he has every single trait that I had talked about for years. So I was very blessed in that I
00:37:46.800 --> 00:37:50.700 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: you manifested my husband, who also helped me to heal.
00:37:50.730 --> 00:38:08.700 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: He's very sweet. He's very gentle. He's a complete opposite of my first husband, which is against something a lot of people. Usually you wind up with the same person, just a different face in it, but because I was used to being so abused. But I I had done so much healing with what my mentor gave me, and just
00:38:08.700 --> 00:38:12.580 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: talking about my perfect man. All the time I manifested my husband
00:38:12.590 --> 00:38:27.250 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: he really helped me to realize some of the lies that I still believed about who I was, and who my family was, just by gently pointing little facts out to me, and
00:38:27.250 --> 00:38:33.480 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: just definitely, always supported me one of the biggest things. This is why, Mary, that it's not it.
00:38:33.700 --> 00:38:36.200 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: It tells you what type of a man my husband is.
00:38:36.740 --> 00:38:52.870 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: We went to the Park, and we had stopped at a fast food place and got some 32 out. So this before we went to the park, and we were just talking because my son had the whole football team at my house, and we wanted to be alone right. So we're in there talking, and I spilled this coke.
00:38:52.870 --> 00:39:03.810 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Now, up. Until that time I did not believe mental abuse existed. I thought mental abuse was the biggest bunch of hogwash anybody ever could come up with. So I spoke my coke all over Mike's track.
00:39:03.920 --> 00:39:18.140 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Mike jumped out and he picked up some Max and he started cleaning it up because most of was on his side, and I curled up into a little ball on the passenger side, and started rocking and chanting. I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry.
00:39:18.590 --> 00:39:34.610 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and he said he looked at me with the most confused look I've ever seen in my life, and said, baby, you have nothing to be sorry for, and I started sobbing because I wasn't used to being treated nice. I wasn't used to being treated with respect. Had he called me names?
00:39:34.830 --> 00:39:45.890 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: That's a nice names, and had told me as clumsy, and started screaming and yelling. I could have handled that, because that's what I had been used to from my father and my ex, but I was not used to being treated nice.
00:39:45.930 --> 00:39:57.530 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: He sat in that wet, sticky seat for 3 h, and held me while I cried and tried and cried, and really let go of so much that had happened to me in my past.
00:39:57.600 --> 00:40:15.130 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I always sort of tease. That's why I married him. That sounds like a keeper to me, and so. But you know he helped me grow too, and he always supports me like he has not and will not read my book. He knows about my past, but he doesn't want
00:40:15.320 --> 00:40:23.570 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: he. He thinks this would be too hard for him like my daughter said it was hard for her. She knew everything that it happened.
00:40:23.790 --> 00:40:42.280 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and so, but he, you know, again help me. So I supported me. As I said, I worked at social services. I'd like helping people, and also I was. I was a board entrepreneur. I always wanted my own business. I always wanted the freedom that came with that and the freedom tab what I wanted
00:40:42.280 --> 00:40:52.230 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: so much. So when I was 10 years old I used to like to go to this park. Next to the park was the Los Angeles river bed, and the other side was a golf course.
00:40:52.230 --> 00:41:11.810 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Well, I didn't have money to spin at the Park to go swimming to buy ice cream to play the games they had, and they have it. So I would go to the inside the river bed so dangerous, and collect and click the golf balls, take them home, wash them, then take them and sell them to the golfers, so i'd have money to spend at the
00:41:11.810 --> 00:41:31.100 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I did that as 10 years old, so obviously I've always had this entrepreneurial. So we don't have a lot of time left. So I just curious what made you decide to focus on visibility as your specialty. At first I was a divorce coach, and I lived in. I started coaching in 2,009 as a divorce coach, and
00:41:31.100 --> 00:41:42.030 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: what happened was I had had other online businesses that I knew a lot about the online world, so I had to utilize all those strategies to get visible to get seen, to get known.
00:41:42.240 --> 00:41:50.290 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and what happened was within 2 years I was able to take an early retirement from social services and take my business full time.
00:41:50.350 --> 00:42:03.660 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and I started going to events, and people would ask me, how did you get on the harmony? How did you get on having to post. How did you get on prevention? Can you show me how? So I morphed into being the visibility with
00:42:03.660 --> 00:42:20.820 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: based on what I was doing with my divorce coaching I have been the visibility with since 2,017, straight in 2,017. I left the divorce coaching and concentrated on being the visibility with. And how long had you been in divorce coach before you focused on visibility?
00:42:20.980 --> 00:42:40.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Long time? 2,009 to to 2,017 about 8 years. Okay, interesting, interesting, cool. So it's really. You just kind of shifted with what people said. They wanted to learn from you like what was important to them, and you were like, oh, yeah, I know how to do that.
00:42:40.610 --> 00:42:46.450 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Exactly
00:42:46.470 --> 00:42:52.970 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: 1998. So I had a lot of experience that helped me
00:42:53.210 --> 00:43:00.930 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: even be successful as a coach, because I understood the online world, and I do it without advertising.
00:43:01.230 --> 00:43:20.820 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I I I have a client. I have a client, Karen. When she came to me. She had been a coach for 6 months. She had spent 8,000 on Facebook ads. She had 600 people on her list and 0 clients within 3 months. The first thing I had to do is stop that Facebook ads
00:43:20.820 --> 00:43:37.060 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: within 3 months, without any ads. She had had a 2,000 people to her list and had 3 high end, paying clients with the lowest being 5,000. So she yeah. So that's the power of being visible
00:43:37.120 --> 00:43:51.920 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: to get your leads and clients versus paying thousands of month dollars for that. Absolutely. Okay. We're gonna take our last break of the show, and when we come back maybe you can give some tips to our audience who, you know, let's say they're doing something.
00:43:52.250 --> 00:44:05.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What can they do to be a little more visible, and and maybe like, maybe even some tips around sort of the psychology of being visible. You know, when you have things like, maybe you don't want to be so visible about.
00:44:05.290 --> 00:44:06.990 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: You know what I mean.
00:44:07.090 --> 00:44:16.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Awesome. So everyone please stay tuned You're listening to the conscious Consult my awakening humanity, and we'll be right back with our guest, Cindy Holbrook in just a moment.
00:44:19.620 --> 00:44:43.710 Hey, Buddy, it's Tommy deed a nonprofit sector connector coming at you from my attic each week here on talk, radio and Nyc: I hosted program for lambda game focus. Nonprofits impact us each and every day, and it's my focus to help them amplify their message and tell their story. Listen: Each week at 10 a. M. Eastern standard time until 11 a. M. Is from standing time right here on talk radio, Dot Nyc.
00:44:44.540 --> 00:45:12.360 In the moment world, you may have many unanswered questions regarding your health. Are you looking to live a healthier lifestyle? Do you have a desire to learn more about mental health, and enhance your quality of life? Or do you just want to participate in self-understanding and awareness? I'm. Frank R. Harrison, host of Frank about health, and each Thursday I will tackle these questions and work to enlighten you tune in every Thursday 5 P. M on talk radio, and Nyc. And I will be frank about help to advocate for all of us.
00:45:15.860 --> 00:45:46.160 Are you a conscious co-creator? Are you on a quest to raise your vibration and your consciousness. I'm. Sam Leibowitz, your conscious consultant, and on my show, the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. We will touch upon all these topics and more. Listen. Live at our new time on Thursdays at 12, noon, Eastern time. That's the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. Thursday's 12 noon on talk radio and Nyc.
00:45:50.540 --> 00:46:00.480 You're listening to talk radio and Yc: at Ww: talk radio and Yc: now broadcasting 24 h a day.
00:46:08.920 --> 00:46:15.780 You Okay. you
00:46:23.950 --> 00:46:39.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and welcome back. I was just checking the Facebook. Live, and I see a couple of our loyal listeners, Sonia checking in, and Paddy Paddy, says Cindy i'm captivated by your story. I can't wait to get your book. You're such a strong person.
00:46:39.210 --> 00:46:55.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I see you. You're You're touching my my loyal listeners and my audience today, Cindy. So that's wonderful. So let's say somebody has some kind of business. Maybe they're a coach. Maybe there's some kind of expert or or what have you?
00:46:55.860 --> 00:47:04.400 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And and they they're dealing with these feelings of, you know. Do I deserve to have success, or like? Oh, you know, Dude.
00:47:04.460 --> 00:47:22.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know I I don't want to be too visible, because that will, you know, reveal things about me. I don't want to reveal. How do you help people to kind of just overcome sort of the mental blocks of visibility. Then maybe you can give us just a couple of little tips of practical things that people can do to be more visible.
00:47:22.860 --> 00:47:40.550 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: And that's again one thing. So I love as well, because people play that I want to be seeing. Can you see me here. I am right, because we we're hiding all these things regardless what it is. Maybe having a bad hair day. Maybe you just had an argument with your significant other. Maybe you just
00:47:40.550 --> 00:47:51.070 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: yelled at your kid. You know it's or things from the past are creeping up the little grimlands. The lies that you were led to believe, based on the past.
00:47:51.070 --> 00:48:12.500 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: So you're not fully showing up, and there's a lot of things that we will not do, visa being visible. You know it's an energetic thing, and people can see you. And if you're trying to hide something while you're visible on camera, or even if you're not on camera. There's an energy where somebody's like something's off about that person. I don't know quite what it is.
00:48:12.620 --> 00:48:17.080 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: so I like helping people step into what I call outrageous confidence.
00:48:17.100 --> 00:48:21.070 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Outrageous is something bold, startling, and different.
00:48:21.160 --> 00:48:29.390 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Confidence is a state of being. It's a choice. It's nothing more. You're never going to achieve quote unquote confidence.
00:48:29.390 --> 00:48:49.180 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: but with any given task i'm confident that I can go on my kitchen and wash a dish. I'm confident that I can get dressed in the morning. Right? These are just things. I'm confident that I can do whatever i'm doing to the best of my ability. So when you use things that you might not ordinarily do. Long time ago
00:48:49.180 --> 00:49:07.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I went to an event, and this lady told me that my sweater made me look fat and frumpy. No person wants to be told they look fat, and so I didn't wear this sweater for years. And then one day it was cold outside, and I had some errands to run, and I went to like
00:49:07.190 --> 00:49:25.310 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: 3 or 4 different stores At each store somebody stopped me and told me how beautiful the sweater was, and how beautiful I was in this weather! And at that point I thought, Why am I listening to one person? We listen to one person, be it the Gremlins in our head, our father, our teachers, our siblings.
00:49:25.310 --> 00:49:48.990 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: something like this, and it gets into our head so that outrageous comes into you doing something both startling and different for you. Sam might not think it's bold. I might, I think, is vote, but it's bold for you, because it's not something you've never done before. So what I did was I went home. I had my husband take a full length picture of me in this sweater, and I sent it to my entire email list.
00:49:48.990 --> 00:49:52.670 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: That was an outrageous confidence moment
00:49:52.850 --> 00:50:05.850 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: last year, in 2,022 I was very ill with Covid. It was in the hospital for over a month. and whenever I got home I started losing my hair. I lost 95% of my hair.
00:50:05.870 --> 00:50:15.410 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I did not I this really just. I did not want to be on camera. I bought a week, but I still didn't feel comfortable in the wig. I hated it.
00:50:15.460 --> 00:50:33.180 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: so I was always starting out with hey, you know I'm wearing a wig. But what did I do? That was bold and startling. I take pictures of my bald head, and I posted them on Facebook. So when you do something like this, what was the response to those pictures? I'm curious. It was very good.
00:50:33.180 --> 00:50:52.070 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: A lot of people told me that's beautiful, even with that here. You know a lot of people like I'm. You know I have a lot of people following me because I was sort of sharing my whole Covid journey back then. So I started once, and I see you just by sharing my journey on Facebook, and I got a lot of people following it.
00:50:52.070 --> 00:51:11.240 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I'm sure a lot of stuff I wrote was crazy. My daughter said I sent her crazy text, but it doesn't have to be something huge every single time you do something small that scares you. Me sending a picture of my sweater, me
00:51:11.240 --> 00:51:29.810 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: posting a picture of my bald head that makes you feel more loved and supported. You're always going to have the haters, and the haters are just haters. You're not put on this earth to serve the haters. There's a certain subset of people that you was born to serve.
00:51:29.820 --> 00:51:36.980 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and if you don't, step up and serve. You're denying those people what they could receive from you.
00:51:37.070 --> 00:51:55.470 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Don't. Worry about the haters. You're always gonna have the haters, but the haters are there, based on their own insecurities and their own beliefs. So with visibility, I really think it's just being you. You don't try to be like somebody else, just be who you are. Whenever you're on camera.
00:51:55.470 --> 00:52:08.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: put a picture of your best friend behind the camera and act like you're talking to your best friend, and just be you. It's so simple and so hard. Yeah, yeah, isn't it, though.
00:52:08.190 --> 00:52:18.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know. And sometimes it's the simplest things are the most profound things that we can do so. So i'm hearing you say authenticity
00:52:18.390 --> 00:52:29.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A, and and also the the thing around confidence you were talking about before it kind of reminded me of a very valuable lesson. I learned from our mutual friend
00:52:29.650 --> 00:52:40.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that there are multiple kinds of confidences. You're not just a confident person or a non-confident person, you can be confident about different things. Right?
00:52:41.090 --> 00:52:42.190 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Exactly.
00:52:42.240 --> 00:53:01.730 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Yeah. So it's like. You may not be confident about one thing, but you're confident about other things. So it's about developing the confidence that you already have, but just moving it into different areas.
00:53:01.730 --> 00:53:19.180 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: But it it's you other People's opinion of me is none of my business whenever you can get to that point. It really helps. Now, my favorite quote in the entire world, just by Eleanor Roosevelt. No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.
00:53:19.180 --> 00:53:35.010 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I love this quote because you can replace that word inferior with literally any emotion No one can make you feel loved without your permission. No one can make you feel hated without your permission. No one can make you feel respected without your permission.
00:53:35.010 --> 00:53:48.470 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: and you can go on and on and on, with literally any emotion there is, and replace that word inferior without that word which goes back even to the beginning. My life is my choice. Your life is your choice.
00:53:48.470 --> 00:54:02.000 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: And so, when you start reframing, you know your thoughts, and no like Don't say, oh, John made me angry because John did not make you angry, because no one can make you feel angry without your permission.
00:54:02.000 --> 00:54:21.100 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: So why are you giving permission to people that are there to bring you down and make you feel miserable. If you yourself the power, by saying, hey! It's my responsibility. I choose to be happy. When I had Covid. I chose my doctor said I lived because I was positive
00:54:21.170 --> 00:54:37.310 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: literally. If they said people came in half as sick as me and died, I I was on 100 person oxygen for 2 weeks, and I was very ill. Okay, but from the second I could put in there I decided that I was going to be grateful
00:54:37.310 --> 00:54:51.860 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: at my husband. Bring me a Rose Courts crystal. I hang it on the doctor's board when I was having a hard time breathing or wanted to meditate. I focused on the crystal, but I think that just the simple gratitude I thank each and every person that came into that room
00:54:51.860 --> 00:55:08.170 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: the headflow. Bottomus wouldn't let nobody else take my blood, because he wasn't used to being thinking, being thanked right now, you know, and I listened to a positive stuff. I hardly had my TV on it all. I was always listening to sound balls, or
00:55:08.170 --> 00:55:13.600 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: or Wayne Dyer or Tony Robbins always had something positive on my phone that I was listening to.
00:55:13.790 --> 00:55:26.480 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: 2 days before I got out of the Icu, a new nurses. They came in the room, and she just sort of stopped and looked around. She goes. God! There's so much positive energy in here! And I said, Yes.
00:55:26.480 --> 00:55:39.060 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I create a positive energy in an icu room, and it really is that powerful your thoughts what you're telling yourself Had I just laid there and thought, hey, you know
00:55:39.100 --> 00:55:52.110 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: No, yeah. Very few people come out, I mean they prepared my family for me to die. I was bad, and so i'm like I could have just to come to that. But instead I chose. I costly toed myself my body's healing myself.
00:55:52.110 --> 00:56:03.410 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: My body knows how to heal myself, and I trust my journey whatever. For whatever reason this is my journey right now, going along with what you were talking about. I had no idea what, but Covid
00:56:03.450 --> 00:56:23.360 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: gave me a lot of clarity about where I want to go in the future, and who I want to be.
00:56:23.360 --> 00:56:36.700 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: I have a it's called 5 Keys to feel worthy of success. There's lots of exercises in there for you to do to start feeling worthy. These are exercises that I did myself.
00:56:36.700 --> 00:56:50.200 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: So you can go to Cindy J. holbreak.com forward, slash 5 keys, K. E. Y. S. And get the book, and don't just read it. Actually, do these exercises?
00:56:50.200 --> 00:57:02.690 Cindy J. The Visibility Wiz: Just the act of doing these exercises are going to help you feel worthy, or in see your own strength and your own gifts, and help you shine and be the like to the world that you're meant to be
00:57:02.720 --> 00:57:12.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: wonderful. Well, thank you, Cindy. Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to come on my show. I know you had to arrange something to be here. So thank you so much for taking time.
00:57:12.950 --> 00:57:35.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Thank you, my loyal listeners for tuning in today as always, and of course, if you missed any part of today's show, you can always catch the replay on talk radio data, Nyc: and we're on all the major podcasting platforms. Apple Google Stitches spotify Pandora. I heart radio. You can find the podcast on Youtube, the video on Youtube. Thank you all for tuning in we will talk to you all next week.
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