Always FreyDay

Friday, October 28, 2022
Facebook Live Video from 2022/10/28 - Finding Life After Failure

Facebook Live Video from 2022/10/28 - Finding Life After Failure


2022/10/28 - Finding Life After Failure

[NEW EPISODE] Finding Life After Failure

The audience will hear from a survivor of failure’s darkest moments, who is now prepared to coach those ready to leave the pain behind and launch into a new level of success, contentment, and happiness.

Many successful SMB owners have failed at some point...even if they won't admit it!  Some of the most important lessons in life and business can be learned from failures.People stuck in lackluster lives are often held back by unresolved issues around setbacks or failures.  Our special guest believes that success in anything comes down to doing the right things, the right ways and that most people guess their way forward, instead of turning their setbacks into success stories.We are joined by Jim Swan, Founder of James Swan Coaching & Consulting.  After struggling through a series of catastrophic professional and personal failures, Jim launched a new coaching practice focused on supporting SMB owners and leaders.  He coaches creatives and entrepreneurs through recovery from the pain of setbacks and failures and into the light of their best life ever.






Phone:  (310) 628-1453

Complimentary Coaching Session:

Tune in for this sensible conversation at

Show Notes

Segment 1

Segment 2

Segment 3

Segment 4


00:00:33.830 --> 00:00:45.620 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Well, hello out there, planet Earth and Happy Friday. Ah! Getting ready for some World Series action here. Unfortunately, my Yankees will not be joining them. It's just about Halloween, and it's Friday,

00:00:45.630 --> 00:01:03.370 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and it's always Friday with me, Stephen Fry your Smb. Guy, I see. Why am I, or in case you missed it. Smb. Stands for small and medium-sized business. For the last twenty years i've been a consultant for Sms. A voice and a sounding board for business leaders, advocating wherever I can on their behalf, their employees to,

00:01:03.380 --> 00:01:31.840 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: I believe, very strongly in sharing stories, providing perspective and creating connection. So every single Friday. You can find me right here on taught radio and Nyc doing just that lending what's left of my mind and my voice to this radio show where I interview Smb leaders and their trusted advisors. One thing that I've noticed over the years, everybody, some of the best thought leadership for Smbs. It happens on Friday, just about that time we feel the freedom of the weekend descending.

00:01:31.850 --> 00:01:44.049 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: However, we're also anxious to start the weekend. I know that I am these crucial pearls of wisdom. They're often overlooked. They're forgotten. There is the side in favor of our fun, weekend activities, and our freedom from work

00:01:44.060 --> 00:01:56.080 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: here on the show. We take advantage of that weekend freedom in clarity. We discuss popular topics that are on the minds of business leaders and their trusted advisors and coaches. The name of the show, not just to play on words, people the name.

00:01:56.230 --> 00:02:25.180 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: My last name means free in German, so there's a little bit of method behind the madness. Just wanted to let you guys know. So we're just about at Halloween here. The trunker treats are in full effect. I've probably gained about ten pounds already, with the multitude of candies that are flying around the house. Not so much originality in costumes. My wife and I forgot to plan ahead once again. So ah! You know my standard kind of hippie dreadlock type of costume. I'm wearing a a taekwondo outfit right now.

00:02:25.190 --> 00:02:38.539 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Make no mistake. I'm not a martial artist. I am not in shape. I had a Mick rib for dinner last night, so don't judge me people. Today we are going to be talking about finding life after failure

00:02:38.550 --> 00:02:56.470 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: sounds like some heavy stuff. But we're We're gonna try to make light of this here today, because most people out there will agree that some of their best lessons actually get taught when they're down and out when they fail when they make a mistake. And yet there's still a lot of people that I run across, especially in the Smb world

00:02:56.480 --> 00:03:11.000 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: that really have trouble, admitting that they failed at some point, or that they even ever make mistakes, especially if you have the mentality about you to actually take the risk, and to be an entrepreneur, and to be a business owner.

00:03:11.310 --> 00:03:27.939 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Sometimes it really hurts the pride a little too much to recognize that there's a little bit of. There might have been a misstep here in there. Something might have been done better. And, by the way, just because your business grosses ten million bucks doesn't mean that you know there's any sort of failure there. But If it could have been grossing twenty million books,

00:03:28.090 --> 00:03:56.849 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: you might have missed an opportunity somewhere, so it's always good to kind of look at ways to continuously improve. Anyway, talk is cheap. We don't want this to just be talk the goal Here, everybody. Let's use the insight on the Smb. Landscape and create more impact on Monday morning. It is far too often that I see businesses focused on the product that's going to solve all of their problems. The shiny new mouse trap, the magic wand, whatever you want to call it.

00:03:56.860 --> 00:03:59.370 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: One consistent thing I see out there is that

00:03:59.380 --> 00:04:27.680 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: products. They change every single day in everything that we do. There's no substitute for surrounding yourself with the right people, first keeping a focus on the process that will help you achieve your goal. You do that the right products will be there when you need them. Whatever the product is, doesn't really matter. Everything's going to begin and end with people. So I know I have the right people around me today. We have a great show for you. We are going to be speaking with Jim Swan, founder of James Swan, coaching

00:04:27.690 --> 00:04:42.349 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: with over twenty years as a small business owner, entrepreneur Ah, award-winning author and marketing Consultant Jim brings his experience as a survivor of success and failure to the world of business coaching and consulting

00:04:42.650 --> 00:04:47.729 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: as a certified professional coach, he turns years of business experience,

00:04:47.740 --> 00:05:17.719 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: personal values, and a belief in the power of transformative energy into a laser focused professional objective to support small and medium-sized business owners as they expand into their highest and best selves. Jim has a Bachelor of Arts degree in Theology and Music from Southwestern University's Architecture Design, Master's degree program, and now add certified coach to his educational accomplishments. He's a past member of the gay and Lesbian Victor

00:05:17.730 --> 00:05:45.879 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Fund, serving on its executive board of Directors. His other commitments have included Pause La which assists with the care of pets for people living with disabilities and Kid Smart an art education foundation for inner city youth. Currently he lives and works from his home on the main coast. James Dash Swan, Dot Com is his website. He is absolutely the person to be speaking with about this topic here today. How to point out the best lessons to be learned.

00:05:45.890 --> 00:06:05.519 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: As always, we're gonna talk about some of my favorite passions. Who's your favorite movie or Tv show character? What's your favorite movie or Tv Show what's your favorite musical instrument? And who's the artist? You'd like to hear play it joining us from one of my new favorite places in the country. Ah! From my visit to Maine last month with my wife, what is referred to as Maine's Mid Coast,

00:06:05.530 --> 00:06:12.200 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Jim James Swan coaching very nice to have you here, my man. Thank you. It's a delight to be with you, Stephen.

00:06:12.580 --> 00:06:24.000 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: So you know again, sensitive topics sometimes, you know, especially when you're dealing with Sms people's, egos, their narcissism, their pride, get in the way of growth like this.

00:06:24.010 --> 00:06:36.199 Jim Swan: But tell us a little bit about how you got where you are today. I have a feeling. You have some great intimate discussion on the subject. There. There are a few stories floating around for sure. Um, I suppose the the real journey, one hundred and fifty

00:06:37.330 --> 00:06:45.899 Jim Swan: began at the end. Um in two thousand and nine a business that I had loved and nurtured and worked hard to build,

00:06:45.970 --> 00:07:05.889 Jim Swan: and it built a pretty substantial. We had a staff of fourteen. We were doing interior design and architecture projects from our office in Beverly Hills. Um all over the country, working with amazing leaders in business uh industry. Ceos uh doing amazing projects and having a great time doing it. Um!

00:07:05.900 --> 00:07:07.750 Jim Swan: And then the economy turned,

00:07:07.800 --> 00:07:12.600 Jim Swan: and I thought that I was doing the right thing by reaching out to my banker.

00:07:12.610 --> 00:07:32.489 Jim Swan: All my buddies were doing this. All my friends. Um! I had equity built into my house. I took a loan out against the equity, drew the equity out to keep the business afloat, for for you know it was going to be a short term. We we'd weather the storm, and on December, right around December first of two thousand and eight, when the

00:07:32.580 --> 00:07:40.470 Jim Swan: real estate bubble burst in Los Angeles, and I suddenly found myself upside down on about a million and a half dollars worth of of loans.

00:07:40.570 --> 00:07:59.080 Jim Swan: Um in the the the months that came after that with the bankruptcies and the loss of the home and the loss of friends. So I guess the real story for me began at about two in the morning. Um on the rooftop of the Condo building that I lived in

00:07:59.090 --> 00:08:03.739 Jim Swan: uh, with my feet dangling over the edge, and um I couldn't.

00:08:04.900 --> 00:08:10.620 Jim Swan: All evening I hadn't been. I had been unable to come up with a reason not to take that final step,

00:08:10.820 --> 00:08:13.289 Jim Swan: and I hadn't been able to come up with one.

00:08:13.470 --> 00:08:29.520 Jim Swan: And so there I sat watching the traffic. It's a pretty spectacular view from up there. I got to tell you. Um, but my two dogs. I had a pair of Yorkshire terriers, a father and son pair, and they had followed me up to the roof. I hadn't realized it, and they began yapping they were.

00:08:29.800 --> 00:08:34.259 Jim Swan: They want a daddy to come down off of that parapet, and that was the reason

00:08:34.280 --> 00:08:39.169 Jim Swan: that was the reason that I came up with to to ease away from that edge,

00:08:39.539 --> 00:08:46.539 Jim Swan: tend to gather the dogs and gather the shreds of my dignity, and try to try to go on from there, and um,

00:08:46.580 --> 00:08:56.099 Jim Swan: and I wish I could say that that was the last moment like that that I had. But I I can't. Um. I stumbled for the next

00:08:56.520 --> 00:08:59.399 Jim Swan: Hmm. Almost nine years

00:08:59.570 --> 00:09:01.579 Jim Swan: hits and misses

00:09:01.980 --> 00:09:28.309 Jim Swan: trying to get established. I mean, I was doing consulting work. I had moved to Maine, Uh. From Los Angeles huge change. It was the best move of my life, but in the moment, uh Steven it was. It was really just about hiding. I wanted to be as far away from my failure as I could get, and you can't get too much further from Los Angeles than the main, physically, I mean. I guess I could have gone overseas, but

00:09:28.340 --> 00:09:34.030 Jim Swan: because that language thing you run into often, and i'm not good with languages. So. Um!

00:09:34.290 --> 00:09:51.510 Jim Swan: So I ran away to Maine, and I licked my wounds, and I tried to figure out what the rest of my life was going to be like, and I found little things to keep me occupied and to sort of pay the bills. But nothing was meaningful, nothing was was fulfilling that certainly wasn't a passion project,

00:09:51.530 --> 00:09:58.189 Jim Swan: and along the way I found myself mired in another mass a mistake that I made

00:09:58.210 --> 00:10:08.059 Jim Swan: that really was the nail in the coffin for me if if we're going to use sort of Halloween terms. Uh since we are here.

00:10:08.070 --> 00:10:30.209 Jim Swan: I I was working, I you know I had for years had worked with an office full of people. I had an account, the bookkeeper people to handle all of those things for me, but here I was just out on my own. I had found a client. We took a deposit. I deposited that money into the only bank account that I had at the time. Um When about my business they postponed the order

00:10:30.220 --> 00:10:37.710 Jim Swan: rather than installing immediately. They wanted to wait until spring, when we could get an in an electrician in to do this work.

00:10:37.820 --> 00:10:49.200 Jim Swan: Um! And so I said, great no problem. We put it put the order on pause, and of March came around. They reached out to me and Holy Shit. I'd forgotten about the money.

00:10:49.490 --> 00:10:59.939 Jim Swan: Not fourteen thousand dollars. It's not an insignificant sum, and I scrambled. I tried it, got some of it together to to make good on this commitment. Um,

00:11:01.040 --> 00:11:11.850 Jim Swan: and ultimately I I did pay it all back, but in the course of that process they decided that that wasn't good enough, and they took the story to a local news station

00:11:12.170 --> 00:11:29.700 Jim Swan: and um we were featured actually uh, oddly enough, and i'm, i'm just realizing this is i'm saying this, it was Halloween weekend uh in two thousand and seventeen when this happened, and the story hit the news, and what was left of the life that I had tried to carve out

00:11:30.340 --> 00:11:39.719 Jim Swan: uh vanished overnight. I became persona non grata in my industry. I was a pariah uh

00:11:39.730 --> 00:11:51.560 Jim Swan: public enemy Number one. I had people railing against me on social media. I was, I was the devil incarnate, and I I got to admit I was. I mean in that context. I had made a really bad mistake.

00:11:51.630 --> 00:11:59.639 Jim Swan: I had paid it back, which I think is important, but but I nonetheless made this mistake, and

00:11:59.740 --> 00:12:10.639 Jim Swan: so I watched in about forty-eight hours what was left of my life just evaporate. It was gone. People that I had known for twenty years wouldn't take my calls,

00:12:10.710 --> 00:12:21.759 Jim Swan: wanted nothing to do with me. This, and disavowed me on social media just about me every chance they got, and I found myself sleeping on a friend's sofa because

00:12:22.480 --> 00:12:32.600 Jim Swan: there was no money left. There was nothing left. There was no passion to get up the next day, and to try to figure it out. It it is all gone,

00:12:35.210 --> 00:12:41.500 Jim Swan: and I stumble. I did that for about three months. I just stumbled around until I finally

00:12:41.610 --> 00:12:48.329 Jim Swan: connected with a friend, one of the few friends that had. Stu has stuck with me even to this day. Um,

00:12:49.050 --> 00:12:59.330 Jim Swan: who provided some encouragement and offered offered me a little gift. They offered me a coaching session. I didn't know anything about executive coaching or

00:12:59.360 --> 00:13:03.570 Jim Swan: personal coaching or life coaching, or any of this. I'd never heard of it,

00:13:03.770 --> 00:13:16.529 Jim Swan: but it was someone who was offering a lifesaver, and I was clearly a man drowning, so I took it, and and the coaching session Steven wasn't a panacea. It didn't

00:13:16.560 --> 00:13:22.779 Jim Swan: fix it all, but it Let me realize that there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and that if I

00:13:23.680 --> 00:13:25.370 Jim Swan: if I persevered

00:13:25.990 --> 00:13:29.810 Jim Swan: that maybe this story wouldn't have the ending that

00:13:30.070 --> 00:13:33.360 Jim Swan: that I had had these two brushes with, and

00:13:33.650 --> 00:13:39.280 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: you know that's what I find. I feel like a lot of people start to doubt. Coaching is because

00:13:39.310 --> 00:13:49.369 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: they expect it to be a magic one. That is the fantasy. It's the beginning and the end of all things. It's some type of product that is going to fix everything all at once, and just straight up does not work that way.

00:13:49.380 --> 00:14:07.460 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: But i'm curious to hear the rest of the story, because you didn't run away from Maine. You're still there. It's still one of the the coolest places that I've been and tend to visit there every year from here on out. But ah! We're going to talk a little bit more about the method behind your madness when we come back from this break with Jim Swan, founder of James Swan coaching. Stay with us.

00:14:10.630 --> 00:14:30.349 Are you a business owner? Do you want to be a business owner. Do you work with business owners? Hi! I'm. Steven, fry your small and medium sized business or Smb. Guy and i'm the host of the new show always Friday. While I love to have fun on my show, we take those Friday feelings of freedom and clarity to discuss popular topics in the Minds of Smps today.

00:14:30.360 --> 00:14:36.590 Please join me at my various special guests on Friday at eleven Am. On talk radio, dot nyc

00:14:38.820 --> 00:14:45.449 Are you a conscious Co-creator? Are you on a quest to raise your vibration and your consciousness?

00:14:45.460 --> 00:15:09.400 I'm. Sam Leibowitz, your conscious consultant, and on my show, the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. We will touch upon all these topics and more. Listen. Live at our new time on Thursdays, at twelve, noon, Eastern time. That's the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. Thursday's twelve noon on talk. Radio. Nyc:

00:15:14.450 --> 00:15:43.330 Are you on edge, hey? We live in challenging Edgy time. So let's lean in. I'm Sandra Bardman, the host of the edge of every day, which airs each Monday at seven P. M. Eastern time on talk radio dot Nyc. Tune in Live with me and my friends and colleagues, as we share stories of perspectives about pushing boundaries and exploring our rough edges. That's the edge of every day on Mondays at seven P. M. Eastern time on talk radio, Dot Nyc:

00:15:44.690 --> 00:15:55.970 You're listening to talk radio, Nyc: uplift, educate and power

00:15:56.070 --> 00:15:56.960 You

00:15:58.320 --> 00:15:59.710 you!

00:16:01.010 --> 00:16:01.920 You

00:16:01.990 --> 00:16:02.940 you

00:16:23.750 --> 00:16:53.520 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: welcome back. It's always Friday with me, Stephen fry your Smb. Guy, but it's not just me. It's also Jim Swan, founder of James Swan, coaching some great thoughts from Jim in the first segment sounds a little heavy, but we're going to have some fun with it here today, I promise everybody, before we get into the method behind Jim's madness wanted to just sit out by the fire pit for just a moment, as I like to do, or in Jim's case, as I've been telling people lately. I do like to sit on the coast of Maine as well. So just get a

00:16:53.530 --> 00:17:07.030 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: get a few minutes of perspective in Zen. But you talk about with with a certain part of your process. You talk about the ideas of purpose, passion, and strategy, and you talk a little bit about it in the first segment as well

00:17:07.040 --> 00:17:17.660 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: like where you felt like you lost your passion for a while as a couple of months went by, and there, just wasn't really anything getting you out of out of bed or off the friend sofa in the morning to really get moving.

00:17:18.069 --> 00:17:26.579 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: But that's where you know that you need to kind of reset, and you need to figure things out, because for the most part, people know what tugs at their heartstrings right?

00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:34.129 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: The purpose side of things, especially when you're an Smb owner and you're a part of a leadership and management team.

00:17:34.190 --> 00:17:42.079 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Not everyone is clear on the purpose and mission a lot of times. It just becomes all about the product, about the money, about the offering, whatever it is,

00:17:42.320 --> 00:17:54.080 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and a lot of times not good at communicating the purpose or the mission, too. That's why there's so much help these days around marketing and branding, and all of that, so people could really effectively tell their story.

00:17:54.180 --> 00:17:56.109 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: The strategy piece

00:17:56.310 --> 00:18:00.129 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: it rains consistent with me is this is where the most help is needed,

00:18:00.140 --> 00:18:21.389 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and this is where the whole idea of coaching, like the world needs better coaching. I have lots of people who believe in that. Lots of folks who I've interviewed on the show. But yeah, the world needs better coaching in general, and it's the coaching doesn't mean, you know I hired somebody to work with me. Now everything's okay in one fell swoop.

00:18:21.600 --> 00:18:28.000 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: It's It's somebody who can share some stories, help you, share your story, help provide some perspective,

00:18:28.020 --> 00:18:36.560 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and also ultimately create some type of connection with, even if it's with yourself figuring out what your passion is, and reinvigorating you.

00:18:36.570 --> 00:19:04.779 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: So, Jim, this is the method part of the show, the science behind what you do. So you gave us some great background on kind of how you got to the idea of coaching someone started doing it for you. Even coaches need coaches. We all know like That's a very common sentiment out there. But talk to us a little bit about the methodology. What exactly are you doing? How you doing it? And how do you get to go to market for it? Happy to do that, Steven, and thanks again for the opportunity to chat with you today. Love your music. By the way, that's fun. Stuff.

00:19:04.910 --> 00:19:09.550 Jim Swan: Can't can't help but move um the mad or the method. Um,

00:19:10.020 --> 00:19:11.250 Jim Swan: yeah,

00:19:11.420 --> 00:19:21.200 Jim Swan: yeah, I I said it earlier. Coaching isn't a panacea. It's not a pill that you take That fixes everything. Uh, In fact, if it's done right,

00:19:22.090 --> 00:19:28.390 Jim Swan: and my clients, I think, would attest to this. It can be some of the most challenging work you'll ever do,

00:19:28.540 --> 00:19:33.669 Jim Swan: just like working with a really good physical coach at the gym,

00:19:33.990 --> 00:19:38.069 Jim Swan: I mean, if you don't come away from a session having broken a sweat,

00:19:38.620 --> 00:19:42.169 Jim Swan: you know. Chances are You're probably not working hard enough

00:19:42.550 --> 00:19:52.719 Jim Swan: if those muscles aren't a little sore the next day. Chances are you weren't pushing yourself hard enough. I had a ski coach years ago who used to say to me, You know,

00:19:52.910 --> 00:20:00.000 Jim Swan: ski hard to the point that you fall. As long as you fall forward down the hill.

00:20:00.350 --> 00:20:13.269 Jim Swan: You you're you're pushing yourself in the right direction. You gotta be out over the tips of those skis and um, and that's the way it is with coaching. If you're doing it right, it's going to be challenging It's going to shake your life up.

00:20:13.640 --> 00:20:32.850 Jim Swan: But at the end of the day you're going to become the better version of yourself. So the the methodology for me. It was all bound up in in an idea that I came across um called mental fitness um mental fitness, which is kind of defined as your capacity to respond to life's challenges

00:20:32.860 --> 00:20:36.649 Jim Swan: with a positive rather than a negative mindset.

00:20:37.070 --> 00:20:46.709 Jim Swan: And you know you You read those words, or you say those words it's like, Oh, yeah, A positive mindset or whatever, but everything sunshine and roses. Yeah. But when you really think about that,

00:20:46.850 --> 00:20:48.920 Jim Swan: it's your ability,

00:20:49.100 --> 00:20:55.100 Jim Swan: it's your ability to respond to life's challenges. So what challenge are you facing today?

00:20:55.510 --> 00:20:57.109 Jim Swan: The car won't start.

00:20:57.330 --> 00:21:16.930 Jim Swan: You know your your coffee is not made right, wife left. You. You know your business failed you. You swore Sunday night that you were going to stay on that diet all week, and Monday morning you had the that that donut at the office, and you've scuttled that whole. You've scuttled that whole whole plan, and you feel like a failure,

00:21:16.940 --> 00:21:37.829 Jim Swan: and we all do it. And it the Mick rib is an addiction. I definitely felt like a failure this morning. There you go for me. It's for me. It's sweets, you know. If it's got sugar in it. I'm probably going to be be drawn to it. Don't get me wrong. I'm an equal opportunity. Guy. For Okay? Well, we'll we'll. We'll compare notes at another time, then on that.

00:21:37.840 --> 00:21:59.180 Jim Swan: But um! But but this idea of of mental fitness and the impact when when we can strengthen our our meant mental capacities just like working out at the gym strengthens our physical capacities. It allows us to live longer, to live healthier, to look better. Um Mental fitness has an impact on our lives by allowing us to perform at our peak.

00:21:59.770 --> 00:22:05.559 Jim Swan: It brings to our lives peace of mind and mental wellness,

00:22:05.600 --> 00:22:14.439 Jim Swan: and that allows us then to uh to have healthy relationships with the people that are around us. Um, you know the

00:22:14.480 --> 00:22:31.539 Jim Swan: the ideas bound up in in mental fitness are not new. They're based in neuroscience. They're based in uh cognitive behavioral psychology, performance, science and um and positive psychology. So none of these things are

00:22:31.550 --> 00:22:39.140 Jim Swan: new. But what what was new to me, and and the thing that I loved sort of

00:22:39.280 --> 00:22:51.480 Jim Swan: diving deep into when I began to learn about this stuff was the combination. The way those four things can come together and can create an opportunity for personal growth. That small business owners,

00:22:52.850 --> 00:22:54.249 Jim Swan: I think,

00:22:54.280 --> 00:22:58.149 Jim Swan: when they, when they catch a glimpse of what's possible

00:22:59.060 --> 00:23:00.929 Jim Swan: can be very exciting for them.

00:23:01.060 --> 00:23:16.680 Jim Swan: You know the research that's got into this this type of work uh started off with hundreds of Ceos and executives from across the country. It it all actually started in a Stanford study working with students on campus, doing research on them.

00:23:16.690 --> 00:23:39.200 Jim Swan: Um! It expanded. Then out into world class athletes. Uh, and then over the years uh, literally over. I believe it's over a quarter million people in fifty countries that participated in surveys and studies, all feeding into this. This idea of mental fitness, uh, and what it delivers is a really powerful um

00:23:39.210 --> 00:23:48.609 Jim Swan: powerful uh way of approaching life way of approaching our businesses, and it's all based on this idea of factor analysis. Um.

00:23:48.620 --> 00:24:02.430 Jim Swan: In fact, our analysis really, really simply is just getting to the root cause. What is the root cause of the challenge? The problem that we're facing? Um, it's the idea of radical simplification

00:24:02.650 --> 00:24:25.099 Jim Swan: boiling things down to their very essence, and I think that the best example of that Steven is uh, if anyone who is ever painted or has ever been involved in any sort of art. Um. You have thousands of color options when it when you sit in front of that canvas. But when you use factor analysis to boil all of those choices down

00:24:25.110 --> 00:24:26.709 Jim Swan: there's only three.

00:24:26.780 --> 00:24:30.460 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Yup, there's only three red, blue, and green,

00:24:30.640 --> 00:24:33.970 Jim Swan: and those simple components

00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:40.779 Jim Swan: uh with those simple components you can create anything that you want to create anything that you can imagine

00:24:41.090 --> 00:25:07.710 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: can find its place on that canvas. And that thing that you're creating so factor factor, analysis, neuroscience, neuro-linguistic programming and cognitive behavior, like all this type of stuff like I personally like to geek out about because I just like to geek out in general and check it out. But my parents met in one thousand nine hundred and seventy-five at Mount Snow, so they're all ski folk. I started skiing from an early age the fact that you threw in a ski analogy There,

00:25:07.720 --> 00:25:28.449 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: that's the kind of you know. When you distill things down to their most, your core essence it's like. If i'm explaining what you just talked about to my parents, I would use the ski analogy that you just did. But you know the idea of relating the whole. You know, mental fitness to physical fitness and personal world, to business, world, and all of that is very, very big to me,

00:25:28.460 --> 00:25:38.729 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and I know you had some other thoughts that you were about to share, and the last thing I want to do is interrupt that. But you know, looking at something like these five tips to to really like, recover from failure

00:25:38.740 --> 00:26:07.989 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: right like what? Just when you're done working out right like, Why, people drink protein drinks, and that's why people rest, and that's why people go to Saunas and everything. It's. It's a process of you know, rebuilding the body and and rebuilding what was broken down when you were like working real hard and beating on yourself, you know. Give us a little bit of color behind this, because a lot of times. You know that the lessons are learned in the recovery, and and a lot of times people might miss them, especially in the Smb world. Absolutely. No, you're you're absolutely right there, and

00:26:08.040 --> 00:26:16.889 Jim Swan: the the lessons for me. Well, let me let me start with the question. I'll throw a question to you, Steven, and then to your listeners. Um! Is pain good,

00:26:17.260 --> 00:26:23.339 Jim Swan: no pain, no game, no game exactly. We're all very familiar with that phrase,

00:26:24.230 --> 00:26:31.049 Jim Swan: and I and I would agree with you. You know you put your hand on a hot stove. The pain is what tells you to pull that hand away.

00:26:31.900 --> 00:26:35.160 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Yeah, absolutely. So then another question.

00:26:36.430 --> 00:26:48.300 Jim Swan: Have you ever had that voice in your head? Talk to you, and tell you what a horrific human being you are! What a miserable mistake you've made. Yeah, it happens full time. Everybody does. Everybody does every single day of the week.

00:26:48.640 --> 00:26:50.650 Jim Swan: I don't care if you're

00:26:50.770 --> 00:27:06.930 Jim Swan: at the top of a fortune. One hundred company, a Ceo sitting in the boardroom, working with your board all the way down to I don't know the the janitor sweeping the floors in that same building, everybody in between faces, those same thoughts,

00:27:08.260 --> 00:27:19.979 Jim Swan: nothing wrong with those thoughts, the challenges just like with the pain that you realize or you experience. When you touch a hot stove, you don't want the hand to linger. The pain

00:27:20.600 --> 00:27:34.409 Jim Swan: should propel you into action. Move the hand away from the stove. Idiot!

00:27:34.650 --> 00:27:36.320 Jim Swan: When I

00:27:36.420 --> 00:27:43.499 Jim Swan: when I first had that brush with major life altering failure, I call it catastrophic failure back in Los Angeles.

00:27:44.490 --> 00:27:53.379 Jim Swan: I didn't really take my hand too far away from the stove, because I had to get really burned once again before I finally found my way to complete healing

00:27:54.000 --> 00:27:58.799 Jim Swan: um. And what that means is, I realized

00:27:58.930 --> 00:28:18.459 Jim Swan: these voices that were going on in my head. What I chose to do after after the the situation, after the business loss and the the bankruptcy in Los Angeles I chose to for the for the next seven or eight years continually listen and give credence to the negative voice in my head. I call it the saboteurs voice,

00:28:18.580 --> 00:28:30.790 Jim Swan: and as it turns out, we've got a whole cast of characters in our head that are saboteurs. Um, we'll talk. I can talk more about that later. But to balance that on the other side

00:28:30.830 --> 00:28:41.189 Jim Swan: is the sage. There's that little part of us that from our life experience from the books that we've read from the people that we've talked to from the radio shows that we've listened to one hundred and fifty

00:28:41.200 --> 00:29:09.700 Jim Swan: we we get get those kernels of wisdom, those elements of hope, those threads of uh, of possibility that we can hold onto, and and it balances out the negativity of the voices of the saboteurs. And then there's a third, and I like to talk about these three things being the mental muscles that we build when we, when we work on mental fitness uh the the saboteur interceptor, we need to build our ability to intercept those negative voices.

00:29:09.710 --> 00:29:20.319 Jim Swan: They come at us, whether we're sitting at our desk, or whether our heads on the pillow at home, and it's two in the morning, and we're going over all the mistakes that we made that day, and that voice just won't relent.

00:29:20.840 --> 00:29:27.210 Jim Swan: Uh, we need to be able to balance that with the wisdom of the sage, the sage that can come in, and and with empathy

00:29:27.810 --> 00:29:34.859 Jim Swan: look at ourselves the way we would look at a a small child, maybe a puppy or a kitten

00:29:34.870 --> 00:29:50.560 Jim Swan: with love and empathy, and realize that this this creature is precious, You know. I've taken to it's. It's kind of crazy, but I've taken to carrying around in my phone. I I won't take the time to look it up, but I've I've got a picture of myself. It was my second grade school picture,

00:29:50.570 --> 00:30:01.019 Jim Swan: and i'm in a little uh knitted sweater that my grandmother knit me, and I've got sort of strawberry blind hair, and I'm smiling. And I look at that little guy and I'm reminded

00:30:02.600 --> 00:30:05.109 Jim Swan: I'm. Reminded that he's worthy of love,

00:30:05.370 --> 00:30:06.660 Jim Swan: and

00:30:06.670 --> 00:30:36.660 Jim Swan: that he doesn't have to be fall victim to these negative voices that there is that side of me that can be wise and empathetic, and can love him the way he deserves. I love the way you framed all of that because it's definitely not the same as having the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other one, it's, or comedy and tragedy, if you will. The the sage and the saboteur is interesting because the saboteur can be smart here and there, but sometimes trying to act smart gets people into trouble sabotaging themselves, and I can't wait to talk with you more about

00:30:36.670 --> 00:30:43.920 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: that. When we come back from this break again, everybody we're speaking with Jim Swan, founder of James Swan coaching. Stay with us.

00:30:45.150 --> 00:31:12.220 Are you passionate about the conversation around racism? Hi! I'm, Reverend Dr. Tlc. Host of the dismantled Racism show which airs every Thursday at eleven Am. Eastern on top radio dive in Yc. Join me and my amazing guest. As we discussed ways to uncover dismantle and eradicate racism That's Thursday at eleven o'clock Am. On top radio. Dot. Nyc.

00:31:15.680 --> 00:31:41.260 Are you a small business trying to navigate the Covid? Nineteen related employment laws? Hello, I'm Eric sovereign employment, law, business, law, attorney and host of the new radio Show employment law today on my show we'll have guests to discuss the common employment lot challenges. Business owners are facing during these trying times tune in on Tuesday things from five Pm. To six Pm. Eastern time on talk radio that Nyc

00:31:42.490 --> 00:31:43.360 Mhm

00:31:47.000 --> 00:32:11.069 everybody. It's Tommy Dean and nonprofit Sector connector coming at you from my adding each week here on top radio and my Z. I hosted program the land of main focus. Non-profits impact us each and every day, and it's my focus to help them. Amplify their message. And tell their story. Listen. Each week at ten Am. We should stand in time until eleven Am. Is from standard time. Right here on talk radio.

00:32:12.170 --> 00:32:21.599 You're listening to talk radio and Yc. At Ww: talk radio and live Scene: now broadcasting twenty-four hours a day.

00:32:46.610 --> 00:33:15.039 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Welcome back to always Friday with me, Stephen, Fry your Smb Guy. We are chatting with Jim Swan, founder of James Swan coaching. I hope you guys are listening and taking some of this to heart. It's hitting probably every heart string that I have here. Everybody makes mistakes. Everybody fails. Everybody has some madness in their life which we're going to get into with Jim in just a minute, even though he's given us some good teasers of it thus far, but you know it doesn't have to be just the madness that is our Halloween costumes, although there's plenty of that around this time of year,

00:33:15.050 --> 00:33:20.359 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: going back for a second, Jim. You know methods, Segue, into the madness which I definitely like.

00:33:20.370 --> 00:33:35.549 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: You know a good combination of wisdom does come from science and art. So this being the artistic, observational view kind of connecting to the science behind what you do, these five kind of steps that you have towards failure. Recovery.

00:33:35.560 --> 00:33:53.540 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: You, you! You really outlined it well here, and I want people to download it by going to James dashwon dot com. But you know you do A. An if then type of journal which I've always wanted a journal, I have a whole bunch of different formats for them. Everybody wants to journal. Nobody ever does it. I'm. I'm right there with everybody. Right

00:33:53.550 --> 00:33:59.979 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: second thing you say, own your stuff. Take accountability, which we're going to come back to that one in just a second.

00:34:00.160 --> 00:34:08.460 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: So circle the wagons again. I think of that as putting the right people around you at the right time with the right process to get to the right endgame

00:34:08.480 --> 00:34:24.790 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: number four. Serve serve, serve. I love to do everything from a service mindset. That's really what a a lot of this is about, you know, with the Smb owners and with their trusted advisors. Sometimes this this kind of mantra slips the mind a little bit, and there's a lot of value to it.

00:34:24.800 --> 00:34:46.059 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: But then Number Five is the tough one everyone struggles with is create a structure where you could rinse, lad, or repeat where you could follow some type of direction, and you even have a five-step recovery plan on a daily basis, or what have you to actually help people get there? But going back to owning your stuff? This is something that's always really tough, especially with Smb owners

00:34:46.070 --> 00:34:49.510 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: that you can control all of your actions.

00:34:49.670 --> 00:34:52.789 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: You can't really control other people's, actions.

00:34:52.980 --> 00:35:03.020 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: They and that's it like it's. It's really kind of that simple. I still like when I think about my parents, like, you know, talking about the ski analogy that you made before Jim like

00:35:03.030 --> 00:35:18.930 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: they still like. You know my my Dad's seventy five. My mom's just about to turn sixty, nine. They still worry about stuff like complete neurosis, about stuff that is completely out of their control. I have no sort of control over it whatsoever, and yet the stuff that they can control every hour of every day.

00:35:18.940 --> 00:35:27.650 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: They kind of put by the wayside in favor of worrying about the stuff they can't control. So if in case that's not enough madness to te you up for this part of the show.

00:35:27.660 --> 00:35:47.790 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: We want to hear some of the stories that you have from the field. Some of the struggles that people have wrestling with this. Some of the struggles they've had during the pandemic coming out of you know what what was a really unforeseen time for business owners and for people just experiencing failure at an epic level in some ways. Talk to us a little bit about the madness in your world. Absolutely. Um, I mean

00:35:47.800 --> 00:35:52.649 Jim Swan: we We could talk all day about this if we wanted to. Um!

00:35:53.200 --> 00:35:58.099 Jim Swan: There. There are many stories I mind for my own personal madness to um

00:35:58.390 --> 00:36:07.789 Jim Swan: to the madness of of clients that I've experienced uh the the common denominator that I that I've discovered, though Steven is,

00:36:08.230 --> 00:36:16.359 Jim Swan: is, and and maybe it's not the common denominator, but for me it's the powerful. Take away the powerful growth. Opportunity,

00:36:16.380 --> 00:36:35.539 Jim Swan: when we're faced with those kind of challenges is that we don't have to be victims to those circumstances we don't have to always see the world as a win or lose. Um. Covid was devastating

00:36:36.170 --> 00:36:54.900 Jim Swan: to to many people, both physically. Obviously we we lost millions or a million plus people worldwide. Uh, but the the the ramifications for business, for personal lives, education, all all facets of society. Um! But in all of that I believe

00:36:55.500 --> 00:36:59.179 Jim Swan: the more that I've worked with this idea of mental fitness,

00:36:59.680 --> 00:37:05.090 Jim Swan: that every challenge presents us with an opportunity to find the gift,

00:37:05.450 --> 00:37:08.229 Jim Swan: and to find the opportunity

00:37:08.620 --> 00:37:18.799 Jim Swan: when faced with a challenge. I I can respond one of two ways, and it's a right and left brain kind of a thing. We can respond by listening to the voice of the saboteur in our head.

00:37:18.810 --> 00:37:46.800 Jim Swan: The that is going to constantly be judging. There are there ten different types of sabaturs that we deal with. Every every human being on the planet deals with the judge, the judge of the judges ourselves. You're not good enough. You're not smart enough. You're not pretty enough. You're not thin enough. You're not strong enough, you're not You're not. You're not. You're not. Then the judge that turns on others the world around me is is at fault. That guy's a jerk. That guy's an idiot. That guy cheated me. That guy did me wrong.

00:37:47.030 --> 00:37:48.799 Jim Swan: And then there's

00:37:48.830 --> 00:37:53.450 Jim Swan: the when the judge turns its attention to the circumstances that we find ourselves in,

00:37:53.460 --> 00:38:16.039 Jim Swan: and nothing is ever good enough, nothing wasn't right uh my dad was a golfer, and all again growing up. There was a running joke in our house that it'd be a good golfer. You always had to have an excuse, and the weather was usually the easiest one. All the sun got in my eyes. The grass got rained on last night, or or and you always had the excuse. But you were you were you were you were judging a circumstance around you.

00:38:16.050 --> 00:38:19.909 Jim Swan: So what would happen, though, if we flipped that?

00:38:20.240 --> 00:38:27.080 Jim Swan: What if what would happen if we grew our mental fitness to the point that when faced with a challenge,

00:38:27.230 --> 00:38:35.940 Jim Swan: we could automatically, we we could just like our the hand on the hot stove. Ooh! Pain. Ouch, Okay. Got my attention.

00:38:36.230 --> 00:38:44.410 Jim Swan: The circumstance needs me to make a decision. Instead of putting my hand back on that stove, i'm going to look for the gift and the opportunity in this challenge,

00:38:44.700 --> 00:38:45.950 Jim Swan: and

00:38:46.120 --> 00:38:54.829 Jim Swan: what what's possible? What could be possible if we started looking at our lives that way. What I've discovered with my clients is that

00:38:59.260 --> 00:39:02.599 Jim Swan: I don't even know how to how to put this there's no limits.

00:39:02.670 --> 00:39:09.640 Jim Swan: I'll tell you a story about a a a client of mine, who was a friend, and who approached me and said, Jim, i'd I'd like you to coach me.

00:39:09.740 --> 00:39:12.560 Jim Swan: I'm really I'm challenged, and I was

00:39:13.030 --> 00:39:18.210 Jim Swan: the person that I was speaking to was sixty uh seventy, two years old when we began chatting,

00:39:18.480 --> 00:39:38.189 Jim Swan: was in semi retirement. They had uh done restaurant work and hospitality work for their entire career, but had also been an artist on the side, and they had always had a vision, always had a dream that through all their years never materialized, and that was to create an art program uh for kids

00:39:38.710 --> 00:39:44.110 Jim Swan: for children. They love working with children, and they love the idea of introducing children to the creative process.

00:39:44.410 --> 00:39:50.590 Jim Swan: And this person approached me just as Covid was this: The lockdown was beginning, and we began working

00:39:50.740 --> 00:39:53.319 Jim Swan: over zoom every week,

00:39:54.860 --> 00:39:59.939 Jim Swan: and they struggled so much with that inner sabotur.

00:39:59.950 --> 00:40:19.260 Jim Swan: You're too old. You're not talented enough. No one will ever take you seriously. The pandemic. No, but nobody's going to want to let their kids come to your house. It's create, you know, on and on and on. We worked to to to build up those mental muscles, those the saboteur uh

00:40:19.270 --> 00:40:43.449 Jim Swan: interceptor. I like to call it the the muscles that allow you to stop listening to the the negative sabot your voice, and instead switch and and look at the sage voice, sage voice. It is rich with things like empathy and creativity and action and empowered learning. And suddenly

00:40:43.760 --> 00:40:54.919 Jim Swan: this person began to connect the dots, and i'll race ahead to the end of the story she's just now I I give it. I give something away. It was a she, not a he. Um!

00:40:55.210 --> 00:40:59.639 Jim Swan: They are just now beginning their third year

00:40:59.810 --> 00:41:02.990 Jim Swan: with their with now three different

00:41:03.140 --> 00:41:14.019 Jim Swan: pools of students teaching in her home. She has two students, and now she's doing a with a group of seniors, and she's teaching art in her home in her studio.

00:41:14.030 --> 00:41:31.729 Jim Swan: Um, and she has a proper business, so he's done the Llc. She's got a business license. She and she is glowing every time I see her now. She's positively glowing because she's living the possibility instead of seeing it as

00:41:33.390 --> 00:41:52.900 Jim Swan: a negative. There's no way. No one will take me seriously. I'm tooled. I'm all of these things. She saw a possibility, and began to believe in herself and began to take action. Empowered educated, creative action, and she's created something out of nothing that is bringing joy to her

00:41:52.910 --> 00:42:01.000 Jim Swan: and joy to. Now I I think that this total student count is up over twenty that are working with her on a weekly basis, and

00:42:01.080 --> 00:42:08.879 Jim Swan: and it can happen to everyone. But the challenge is, Am I going to view this this situation? That's in front of me.

00:42:09.090 --> 00:42:19.609 Jim Swan: The loss of my marriage, the loss of my business, the challenging staff member who I can't seem to get through to? Am I going to view them as an opportunity and a gift?

00:42:19.920 --> 00:42:34.239 Jim Swan: Or is a challenge that's going to scuttle me, and the choice is ours. I constantly look at these types of discussions as is an obstacle or isn't an opportunity. And while lots of things that change out there can be looked at by people as an obstacle.

00:42:34.280 --> 00:42:52.240 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Yeah, every you know, not to be cheesy about it with the every clouds of silver lining. But there's always an opportunity to grow from it, to learn from it to differentiate from it, to embrace it all of the above. And you know the sage voice I I completely relate to. There's a lot of wisdom that comes from,

00:42:52.250 --> 00:42:59.979 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: you know, being See a sage in general right? And it comes from experience. But you know what a lot of times happens is that people,

00:42:59.990 --> 00:43:24.200 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: you know, quoting Einstein definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result. And I see that all the time in in business, leadership and Sms and whatnot. But it's yeah, especially when they embrace something like coaching and really having another kind of impartial perspective, you know, the closer you are to something, the harder it can be to to to come to reality with some of it.

00:43:24.280 --> 00:43:42.529 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: It's. It really helps them, you know. Take strides, leaps, and bounds. That's great stuff, man. So we're gonna take a quick break. But we will be right back with the one. The only Jim Swan, probably not the only, but the coolest one out there that I've spoken to. So Jim Swan, founder of James Swan coaching. Stay with us everyone,

00:43:45.460 --> 00:44:09.529 everybody. It's coming, Dean and nonprofit sector, Connecticut coming at you from my adding each week here on top radio that in my Z I host the program. The land of main focus nonprofits impact us each and every day, and it's my focus to help them amplify their message and tell their story. Listen. Each week at ten Am. Eastern Stand in time until eleven Am. In some standard time. Right here on talk radio, dot. Nvc:

00:44:10.050 --> 00:44:38.300 You may have many unanswered questions regarding your health. Are you looking to live a healthier lifestyle? Do you have a desire to learn more about mental health, and enhance your quality of life? Or do you just want to participate in self understanding and awareness? I'm. Frank R. Harrison, host of Frank about health, and each Thursday I will tackle these questions and work to enlighten you. Tune in everyday Five P. M. On talk radio. Nyc: and I will be frank about help to advocate for all of us

00:44:44.450 --> 00:44:46.540 calling all pet loggers,

00:44:46.840 --> 00:45:08.609 avengers, a symbol on the professionals and animal lovers show. We believe the bond between animal lovers is incredibly strong. It mirrors that bond between pets and their owners. Through this program we come together to learn, educate, and advocate, Join us, live every Wednesday at two zero P. M at top radio, Dot and Yc:

00:45:11.080 --> 00:45:21.179 You're listening to talk radio, Nyc: at Ww: Talk radio, Andyc: now broadcasting twenty, four hours a day.

00:45:44.270 --> 00:46:14.249 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: We are back, everyone. It's always Friday, and it's me, Stephen Fry your Smb. Guy, We're chatting with Jim Swan, founder of James Swan, coaching some deep deep thoughts and personal reflections. Everybody should be gleaming from this whole discussion here today, but the idea of finding life after failure a big one, Jim's experience did himself. He's helped other people experience the lessons to be learned from it, which is a big deal, Jim. This is the message part of the show, the whole idea again, from weekend insight to Monday impact.

00:46:14.400 --> 00:46:26.210 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: I have a whole bunch of thoughts. You've definitely expressed a bunch here today, but going back for a second the idea of purpose, passion, strategy. It all revolves around people and process. I mean, that's

00:46:26.260 --> 00:46:37.990 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: something that I talk about. Every single week is, and most of the content that you have out there. It's all about people and process. You'll find very little product anything in the discussion. Right?

00:46:38.000 --> 00:46:46.719 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: You gotta figure out like and talk about circling the wagons. Okay, like, when you're down and out, and you really feel down and out, and you're publicly looked at as down and out.

00:46:46.890 --> 00:46:59.550 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Some people. Aren't, going to be there to circle the wagons for you. Some people will be some of the only people that you that you could look through to circle the wagons really important to identify who those folks will be.

00:46:59.610 --> 00:47:07.480 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: If people experience failure, followed by some type of opportunity or product that has the appearance of immediate gratification.

00:47:07.650 --> 00:47:26.509 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: A lot of these types of lessons can be lost, and that's something that i've seen kind of repeatedly happen with the small medium-sized business world. So we want to get some sound bites from you in just a moment. But I I wanted to throw out there one of the many testimonials that you have from a client there. And this goes to some some other things that we were saying right one hundred and fifty.

00:47:26.520 --> 00:47:49.900 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: And this says I was burned out, and had no idea what to do about it, but I had to do something, so I asked James to be my coach. Our initial conversation put me at ease over the coming weeks. We worked on key aspects of my life, such as what I enjoyed, what skills I had, and where I spent my time. These and other thought-provoking questions led me down the path to uncovering what my goals were in life, and how to get there.

00:47:49.910 --> 00:48:07.650 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Strategy, if you will. I found James as an excellent coach. He's courteous professional, maintains confidentiality. He helped put me put the plan into action, a plan to bring joy and meaning back into my life, was key in my in the journey to finding me again highly recommend two.

00:48:07.660 --> 00:48:12.059 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: And the key thing is, this came from another business coach.

00:48:12.870 --> 00:48:32.810 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: So coaches need coaches. Business owners need other business owners, peer group perspective. They need trusted advisors to steer them in the right direction. They might try to figure everything out themselves, which is all well and good. But at the end of the day my next door neighbors a plumber i'm not going to try to become a plumbing expert. I'm going to call him

00:48:32.820 --> 00:48:48.830 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: so. Some great words from clients, James, like thoughts from you, as far as you know really how people could take stock of their, you know, mental fitness, their moral inventory, as far as all of this goes, for life after failure. What can we leave everyone with over the weekend?

00:48:48.840 --> 00:49:03.359 Jim Swan: I would I would challenge your listener, Steven, to do to do something that I did as part of my recovery, and then I do it fairly regularly. Now I have two coaches that I work with on an ongoing basis. Um, I I am.

00:49:03.580 --> 00:49:22.380 Jim Swan: I find it a little suspect when coaches don't have a coach, I mean you're asking people to invest in a in something that's gonna benefit them. And you're telling me now that you don't need that. Okay. But anyway, um, Another Another conversation for another day, one for sure. Yeah, uh, but uh,

00:49:23.420 --> 00:49:25.180 Jim Swan: look around you

00:49:25.650 --> 00:49:35.949 Jim Swan: and look at the most successful people that you know of. And for me, I mean, you can jump on it on the Internet right now and look at the most successful business people. The most successful sports people

00:49:35.960 --> 00:49:50.900 Jim Swan: uh pick any industry, actors, musicians, and every single one who's at the top of their game has some form of a coach attached to their life, to their daily schedule and their daily process of success.

00:49:50.980 --> 00:50:20.400 Jim Swan: Um, every single one of them. I I dare you to find me an Olympic, an Olympic athlete, who doesn't have a coach that they work with on a daily basis? I dare you to find me a musician, vocalist, instrumentalist, who doesn't have someone who daily weekly sits down with them and helps them better their their their technique and master difficult passages. Uh same with business. Same with actors. Anyone who is good at what they do. They have a coach

00:50:20.410 --> 00:50:28.749 Jim Swan: so for small business owners. Does it sound like a ridiculous luxury, like something that will. It is aspirational.

00:50:28.770 --> 00:50:40.560 Jim Swan: Well, maybe, but I would. I would challenge people to think in terms of what tools can get me to the success that I dream of, fast as,

00:50:40.570 --> 00:50:56.799 Jim Swan: and with the least resistance, and I would argue that a a good business coach can do that for you. Now I want to circle back to something that I was touching on a little earlier, and that is this ability to build mental fitness. This is not

00:50:57.040 --> 00:51:07.479 Jim Swan: an abstract thought. Well, if you just sit in a corner and cross your legs and hum a few bars or something, and think about getting mentally stronger that it's going to happen.

00:51:07.850 --> 00:51:26.009 Jim Swan: No, and and i'm i'm making light of meditation a little bit. There I meditate every day. It's a deeply meaningful part of my life. But the beautiful thing about about positive intelligence and mental fitness is that there are actual exercises that you can do

00:51:26.330 --> 00:51:27.720 Jim Swan: daily,

00:51:28.020 --> 00:51:39.220 Jim Swan: that will strengthen these areas of your brain that you need to overcome the saboteur, to unleash the power of the sage and to create

00:51:39.350 --> 00:51:46.020 Jim Swan: new and fresh things in your life and in your career and in your relationships that you never even knew were possible.

00:51:46.030 --> 00:52:00.289 Jim Swan: I mean that's where I sit in my life today, Steve. So you and i'm sitting in the office of a home that is coming up on two hundred years old. It's on a hill overlooking the river here in Maine with the ocean just a few miles down the road.

00:52:00.300 --> 00:52:28.410 Jim Swan: Um, I've got about two acres here. I'm planning a garden that i'm going to plant this spring. I've got barn cats in the bar and out here. I just two little kittens, cause we had a little problem with mice and everybody in the neighborhood said, The best way to deal with it is barn kittens so longer a problem it's. You know. They They were here two days, and I I have a little gift to can't argue with the results exactly. Um, i'm sitting here living a life that

00:52:28.840 --> 00:52:38.839 Jim Swan: that's a smile on my face. You know I smile. Every morning when I get up I get to log on. I get to work with clients around the country and and increasingly around the world.

00:52:38.850 --> 00:52:55.259 Jim Swan: Business owners who are looking for an advantage, who are looking for a a method, a proven technology that they can use to unleash powers of creativity, powers of self control

00:52:55.270 --> 00:53:04.819 Jim Swan: powers of uh intuition that they've never dreamed of. Uh, and it's all possible through some very specific

00:53:04.830 --> 00:53:34.520 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: uh tools and exercises that you can do every day that literally strengthen the brain and the way it interacts with the world. So

00:53:34.530 --> 00:53:48.730 Jim Swan: uh, ha! Is made up of mirror neurons, and when it's presented with something. It will mirror that behavior. So if if I walk into a room, and i'm physically in a dark mood,

00:53:48.780 --> 00:53:56.540 Jim Swan: I can promise you that people in that room will begin to pick up on that, and will begin to mirror back to me. We also, we've all seen it happen.

00:53:56.550 --> 00:54:24.740 Jim Swan: The converse is also true, if I can find within me, by listening to my sage powers rather than my sabotours reasons to smile, all the beautiful benefits, the joys, the the blessings that I have in my life. I mean it doesn't take much to look around the world and realize how how fortunate we are. We have food. We have a roof over our head. There's lots of reasons to smile, and so to to approach a meeting to a person in an approach in interaction with a client or a customer

00:54:24.750 --> 00:54:29.599 Jim Swan: with a smile on our face, with with energy and purpose, and focus

00:54:29.660 --> 00:54:41.619 Jim Swan: it's life, changing it's career, changing. It's business changing. Um! And it sets us up for failure. Can you succeed by by living off of and diving deep into sabote or energy? Absolutely.

00:54:41.630 --> 00:55:08.049 Jim Swan: There are plenty of Ceos around the world that have built their career on stepping on people and yelling and screaming, and and fighting their way to the top.

00:55:08.060 --> 00:55:21.279 Jim Swan: You can have rich, meaningful relationships. You can love yourself when you look in the mirror. You can love the people that are around you, and you can be a war, a a beautiful addition to this world rather than a negative energy suck.

00:55:21.290 --> 00:55:51.129 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: If you're ready to move into your full potential, James Swan, Dot, Com. You can. Google, James Swan coaching You'll find him. The idea of motivation connection. And then actual movement is where you'll find the three steps kicking into action to really start looking at yourself introspectively, but also there's there's a way to fill out a a forum on James Dashwon Com complimentary coaching conversations. There's also a sage and saboteur assessment. If i'm not mistaken, I heard about that as well,

00:55:51.140 --> 00:56:16.250 Jim Swan: Absolutely, Steven and I forgot to mention that uh, yeah, free assessment takes about five minutes to fill them out. Find out what your sage powers are. Find out what your um saboteur challenges are, and uh just shoot me an email, and i'll get that out to anybody is interested. Shoot an email to Jim at James Dashwan, dot Com. Just put Freebie in the in the subject line or Friday always Friday, any one of them will will indicate.

00:56:16.310 --> 00:56:29.959 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: But thank you so much for joining me here today, Jim, really really appreciate it before I let you go. I am going to share the answers you gave me to my favorite passion questions around movies, Tv and music. Your favorite movie character

00:56:29.970 --> 00:56:59.230 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: is Ellen Ripley from the alien franchise, and the way you put it was determination in the face of insurmountable odds, You know, if if everyone out there remembers the alien franchise. It's, you know, the crew of a commercial spacecraft. They They encounter this ridiculously deadly life form. After just investigating what look like an on like a weird transmission. They're trying to figure it out. But like the two moments I think about from from these movies, I think about from the pandemics like. Listen If we break quarantine, we're all going to die

00:56:59.240 --> 00:57:28.789 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: like It's all right. Well, that's kind of how everybody felt during that time, and especially when people are hearing me ramble on for a while. Is that did I Queues just drop sharply while I was away? So But, uh, you also mentioned Robert Downey, Jr. Who, I I think, about a lot, especially these days. He's in a whole bunch of blockbusters that nowadays, and that wasn't always the norm for him. But you talk about just kind of the the roller coaster, you know spectacular recovery from personal and professional failure like failing himself, and I think it's funny when you look him up.

00:57:28.850 --> 00:57:39.279 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: It's like you'll see all of his accomplishments and all that. It'll go like four date ranges. It says early work and critical acclaim career setbacks, which is a nice

00:57:39.290 --> 00:58:09.280 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: kind of loose way of putting it, I guess. Uh resurgence, you know the But look back at life again, and then you see him like kind of two thousand and eight to present like where the financial crisis right about. Then some people were going straight down the tubes, and he was in the Iron Man world and further success. So a lot of fun analogy there to really recovering from the world of failure and making the best of it. But going back to your favorite movie, you can't seem to get away from the alien franchise. So you know again, even the even the sequels is like years and years after

00:58:09.290 --> 00:58:10.919 surviving the attacks,

00:58:10.990 --> 00:58:17.679 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: like Ripley, wakes up from a hyper-sleep, and she tries to warn people about what's going on around them,

00:58:17.690 --> 00:58:39.209 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: and it's like Some of this stuff reminded me of just business owners, Smb: leaders not necessarily learning from the lessons that they've had along the way from previous failures and things that might not have capitalized on the opportunity the best way possible. But, hey, sometimes people just need to learn the hard way and be miserable about it. But there's always a way to do it with a little bit more ease, a little bit more of a smile. So always about that.

00:58:39.220 --> 00:59:08.160 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: And then last, but not least, your favorite instruments. You gave me ones that I haven't gone before. I don't believe the French horn and the oboe, and you talked about your favorite artist in the classical world as Strauss and I wasn't sure if you met Richard or Franz, but it doesn't matter. They both were doing kind of the same thing, anyway. But you know kind of hauntingly romantic exotic sounds notoriously difficult to play, you know, and it's something that you never grow tired of hearing so love love that you shared all that with us appreciate it.

00:59:08.170 --> 00:59:19.229 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: Ah, Strauss also did one of my favorite Ah, two thousand and one Space Odyssey scores. So also Sprag Zarathustra. So that's cool. But ah! Thank you once again for being here with me. I really really appreciate it, Jim.

00:59:20.100 --> 00:59:39.940 Steven Frey @alwaysfreyday @smbguy: All right uh coming up next week will be episode one hundred, if my calculations are correct of always Friday. So you guys tuned in for some fun with that. Until then. Thank you for joining us. We hope you got some weekend insight to make a Monday impact. Have a great weekend. We'll see you next Friday. Eleven Am. Eastern time right here on talk radio, dot Nyc: Bye bye, everyone.

download this episode of