Join Ella, Lillie and Keeth, three entrepreneurial friends, living in NYC, as we share business and personal lessons. We took our daily check-ins full of laughs and stories and created a "pod" where we hold each other accountable every weekday morning at 6:30AM. Thus began the origins of 630 Productions. In this episode, we introduce ourselves, what we do and did in 2020, and how you can create your own accountability group.
Ella, Lillie, and Keeth introduce themselves, their careers, and how long they’ve known each other. The three discuss what they have been doing since their call in the morning, and they begin to discuss how their profession week has been. Lillie explains how many people have been feeling dissatisfied this week, and how she has dealt with that at work. She also explains how many people had been recently sending her emailing in all caps, and the three discuss email etiquette, specifically the use of multiple punctuations such as exclamation marks. Ella explains how her work in real estate was, and how she has been working on her messaging with sellers. The three discuss the “pod” they have created with each other, and how the pod operates, which has the goal of holding each other accountable. Keeth discusses 2020, and how she viewed it as a good year for reflection and self discovery. Ella and Lillie give their opinions on 2020 as well, and how the pandemic and the lockdowns affected them.
Keeth goes in depth into what worked for her in 2020, and how she was able to move closer to her family, as well as work on and complete a project she had been working on for five years. The three discuss Keeth’s move to New York City during the pandemic, and how it affected her and allowed her to reflect on her life. Lillie brings up how in a similar fashion, 2020 brought out thoughts and things that were on the back burner prior, such as in her case she was able to start her own business in 2020. Keeth discusses how 2020 and the pandemic heavily affected relationships, and how many people learned what their coping mechanisms were because of the pandemic. The three discuss relationships in the pandemic, and how all kinds of relationships were brought into the spotlight, and how one is able to realize how much people need other people, but people who are good for them. The three also discuss accountability, and how their pod with each other helped them hold themselves accountable for the goals they set for themselves for the day, as well as helping them balance their goals and to do lists. The three explain the differences between zone of excellence and zone of genius, which are different kinds of goals, and the necessity of having a balance between the two.
The three discuss entrepreneurship, and how it can feel isolating, specifically when one is not friends with any other entrepreneurs, even if their friends and family are supportive of their ventures. They also discuss the importance of being around like minded people, and how they were each able to create their own tribe of like minded people. Keeth discusses how she has an eight o’clock rule, and how after 8PM she tries not to discuss her career when meeting people, but instead tries to focus on the other aspects of people’s lives and their personalities. Ella explains how she is very friendly, and becomes wrapped up in people’s lives, and how that eventually became exhausting. She discusses how women are indoctrinated growing up to be selfless, and she has earned that a healthy amount of self interest is a necessity to live a healthy life, allowing her to be more purposeful with the people she surrounds herself with. They discuss how many people are a good amount of people for a pod, and how that differs for different groups of people, and how they have been successful in having three people in their pod. The three also discuss other aspects that go into creating a successful pod.
The three discuss how their pod operates, and Lillie discusses how Keeth and Ella has helped her with her business, and Keeth specifically reminded her to charge for her worth and not to undercharge. Lillie continues explaining how while working in corporate businesses, others told her her worth through her salary, but being a business owner and being in control of her own worth, which is difficult to do after being told a certain thing for most of one’s life. The three discuss how the pandemic has impacted them emotionally and mentally, and how they were able to self reflect throughout 2020. They also discuss business blueprints, and how their pod has been able to help each other cement their business blueprints in place.
00:00:35.820 --> 00:00:43.800 Ella DeSosa-Butler: hi everyone, welcome to the 630 call Of course I forgot to unmute myself, the first time I am so excited to be here for our first show.
00:00:44.280 --> 00:00:53.550 Ella DeSosa-Butler: For those of you who don't know me, my name is ELENA Sosa Butler I am a real estate agent with compass and i've been practicing real estate for 15 years.
00:00:54.060 --> 00:01:12.390 Ella DeSosa-Butler: In New York City originally from Miami I have a 13 year old son, who is going on 23 and driving me a bit crazy but he's amazing, and I am super excited to be hosting the show with my two fabulous co host lily and Sankey take it away guys.
00:01:13.140 --> 00:01:20.040 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I really want this Thank you so much i'm excited to i'm like I can't even sit still I don't know if you can see me like I feel like have an advance.
00:01:20.430 --> 00:01:29.220 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: But welcome everyone to our show Thank you so much for joining us, my name is lily and pinch, or I am an estate planning attorney i've been an estate planning attorney for.
00:01:29.880 --> 00:01:42.960 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: The summer will be 14 years really excited to be here with you all i'm not from New York, but I live here in New York now i'm actually originally from Providence Rhode island that's my home and I don't have an annoying sign or anything.
00:01:44.700 --> 00:01:48.960 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: But I am a plant mom, as you can see, so i'm happy that you all are here.
00:01:51.450 --> 00:02:02.760 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: hi my name is frankie this over Raja and I am been a practicing attorney for about 12 years i'm originally from Toronto Ontario so the only Canadian in the group, but now I call New York City, my home.
00:02:03.270 --> 00:02:15.660 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And I have been in this connection, and this relationship with these two ladies for almost a year so it's been a great ride and we're just like having a good time, thanks for joining us as well.
00:02:17.430 --> 00:02:24.570 Ella DeSosa-Butler: cool so what's been going on with you guys, since we last spoke this morning anything exciting.
00:02:27.780 --> 00:02:40.320 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: um I talked to a client off the ledge That was my contribution to society today and I made a note to call my mom because when I don't call my mom lady she acts like i've been like kidnapped by boko Haram so.
00:02:45.600 --> 00:02:47.040 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: factor that goes in with no.
00:02:48.810 --> 00:03:01.110 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: No i'm like lady I don't actually live with the phone stapled to my forehead I promise i'll call you back so I made a note to call myself so that's what i'm doing on my mind what i'm doing after we all talk today.
00:03:01.740 --> 00:03:06.330 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Okay nice I started to cleanse I forgot to tell you guys that this morning.
00:03:06.780 --> 00:03:07.590 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I started a.
00:03:08.610 --> 00:03:19.860 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Like a juice cleanse or it's either press juicer E or juice generation, one of them, they sell little like packets for the day so it's like a one day juice cleanse for a reset so I feel healthier already.
00:03:22.170 --> 00:03:23.580 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: So it's only one day of cleansing.
00:03:23.610 --> 00:03:27.180 Ella DeSosa-Butler: yeah yeah but you know it's supposed to reset and change your life so.
00:03:29.250 --> 00:03:30.210 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How that goes.
00:03:30.450 --> 00:03:31.050 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Okay.
00:03:31.830 --> 00:03:34.890 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I feel like this is actually a faster way because i'm here.
00:03:35.340 --> 00:03:38.850 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Trying to run but today's raining and i'm like what how did I planned it.
00:03:39.390 --> 00:03:45.330 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: What happened here where it's just like i'm just running in the rain like i'm a truly dedicated like Forrest gump run.
00:03:45.660 --> 00:03:55.710 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And just keep running type of person, but no I I was like this is even you know the people is my regulars I see on my route they're like today today might not be the day for this and i'm like.
00:03:55.740 --> 00:03:56.250 This is great.
00:03:57.750 --> 00:04:12.360 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I might actually just go to the cleanse part I was like let's just try this okay just might be like a fail safe stay indoors anywhere and you'll be good type of reality because i'm still trying to work off or try to work those new year's resolutions of like trying to be healthy.
00:04:13.620 --> 00:04:17.940 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Try to exercise right off the BAT let's just let's just.
00:04:21.180 --> 00:04:21.960 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: let's just quit and.
00:04:25.410 --> 00:04:28.890 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Resolution in a long time so you're better than me keep that's for sure.
00:04:29.610 --> 00:04:37.320 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I just it's a great time playing not connect but it's really hard when the rain is horizontal yeah yeah.
00:04:38.100 --> 00:04:42.150 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So pod how was your your week your professional week.
00:04:44.430 --> 00:04:55.320 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: it's been crazy every day is a new adventure it really feels like that is a sexy brother law as it is anyway, or just like talking to clients anytime you heard a service based industry.
00:04:55.920 --> 00:05:02.910 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: everybody thinks that bear emergencies your emergency and you're like come down some serious they'll be fine you'll be fine.
00:05:03.300 --> 00:05:16.260 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: you're going to be okay we're gonna be okay let's take a deep breath together and so there's a lot of that this week, for some reason and that's my innately it's always one of those every day's a new day you just kind of go with it.
00:05:17.130 --> 00:05:20.430 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Right, it must be some retro breeding season, because three people have.
00:05:22.830 --> 00:05:32.280 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: expressed their dissatisfaction this week i'm like what are you satisfied with what's going on, what do you want happy about this week so like I said earlier, i've had to talk a couple of people off the ledge.
00:05:33.120 --> 00:05:44.130 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: it's emotional you know it's law but you're still dealing with people, especially in estate planning, if I wanted i'm dealing with this property that I love when i'm dealing with this person that I love and so ella this week has been like.
00:05:44.850 --> 00:05:53.670 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Oh, my God, are you okay like what's happening, why are you freaking out why is your email in all caps that's very aggressive that whole thing this week.
00:05:54.750 --> 00:05:55.230 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Okay.
00:05:55.560 --> 00:05:56.910 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: yeah that's all email.
00:05:57.930 --> 00:06:00.780 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Like what are you shouting about it's the same as I.
00:06:03.150 --> 00:06:10.020 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: hate I hate multiple exclamation marks I hate multiple question marks I hate a scope.
00:06:12.630 --> 00:06:24.300 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: In my life so sorry about that I said I don't think i'll stop there, because I feel like i'm getting my message across, though, like, I feel like my age, though Okay, but it happens.
00:06:24.660 --> 00:06:36.300 Ella DeSosa-Butler: i've actually gotten into I used to annoy me the overuse of exclamation marks, because people use it everywhere, but now i've just fallen into it i'm like if you can't beat them join them, so I just put an exclamation marks everywhere i'm like.
00:06:37.350 --> 00:06:42.870 Ella DeSosa-Butler: it's almost like you're so excited when you're talking to people, you know how was your day so.
00:06:44.760 --> 00:06:51.330 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I just got it i'm so behind on a boat Okay, so you know I stand on.
00:06:52.380 --> 00:06:55.140 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: A planet apparently figured out.
00:06:57.330 --> 00:06:59.160 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: what's wrong with you and we're just talking about.
00:07:00.780 --> 00:07:01.050 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So.
00:07:01.800 --> 00:07:02.910 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I don't know this, what is the.
00:07:06.540 --> 00:07:10.110 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: eggplant eggplant is a phallic symbol.
00:07:10.740 --> 00:07:15.270 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Oh really so that means I can you want to have sex with somebody if you send them the eggplant.
00:07:15.840 --> 00:07:17.040 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: suggestive apparently.
00:07:18.300 --> 00:07:26.130 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: This is like don't don't send the peach okay just do all of these things that might be suggest certain body parts.
00:07:28.200 --> 00:07:31.260 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Are soliciting you're soliciting don't solicit.
00:07:31.980 --> 00:07:35.490 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Right right so essentially how you do your husband or your.
00:07:35.490 --> 00:07:35.910 Personal.
00:07:37.110 --> 00:07:40.860 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: use those to intentionally that's the PSA for today's.
00:07:42.600 --> 00:07:44.700 Ella DeSosa-Butler: lesson and now i'm i'm filing that away.
00:07:45.030 --> 00:07:47.790 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And you got to talk to your son asked your site and kill kill.
00:07:50.430 --> 00:07:53.940 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I don't even want to know, like, I want to know what notes.
00:07:55.860 --> 00:08:10.020 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Oh gosh well for me this week I am it's forever a struggle for real estate agents to try to speak to sellers about their properties I speak to you guys about this, all the time and.
00:08:10.740 --> 00:08:21.270 Ella DeSosa-Butler: sort of learn to be realistic about what their properties worth in the market and to do it in a way, where it doesn't seem like you're you know talking negatively about their product or their property.
00:08:21.630 --> 00:08:30.210 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So I presented an offer to someone, which is a very good offer and they wrote me back like a 10 page email about why their property is worth more so.
00:08:30.570 --> 00:08:41.310 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Just kind of dealing with that you know, working on my messaging but i'm, all in all it's a pretty good week because I did get an offer so just going to make it work yeah.
00:08:42.210 --> 00:08:43.320 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Are we rich now.
00:08:43.950 --> 00:08:45.600 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Almost we're almost rich.
00:08:47.460 --> 00:08:47.910 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Now.
00:08:49.530 --> 00:08:50.010 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I don't know.
00:08:52.530 --> 00:08:53.550 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: you're always rich.
00:08:55.380 --> 00:08:55.980 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Exactly.
00:08:56.430 --> 00:08:57.210 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You know extra.
00:08:59.400 --> 00:09:01.740 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So what is going on.
00:09:03.750 --> 00:09:06.270 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So it's interesting that i've been thinking about.
00:09:08.250 --> 00:09:15.060 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: This pod has really evolved okay so just a brief overview of this pod and we call it a province of 6:30am.
00:09:15.780 --> 00:09:22.140 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Where we three actually get together every morning 630 no fail Monday to Friday you check in.
00:09:22.680 --> 00:09:31.020 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You check in about what our goals are for the day three daily goals, and we also talk about certain things that have happened the day before so.
00:09:31.470 --> 00:09:37.830 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Those three goes into what an ongoing text message that all of us contribute to and we write down our goals.
00:09:38.250 --> 00:09:51.630 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: On at night from like 910 o'clock that night tell how we've accomplished those calls as well if we get to them, you can do them what's going to be pushed over for today very simple call can be anywhere from about five to seven.
00:09:52.140 --> 00:10:00.180 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: All the way to we've had like an hour an hour and a half closed just because each on our soap box, that we need to talk about something so.
00:10:00.690 --> 00:10:15.240 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: It operates accountability and therapy group as well too so it's actually very interesting going on for both Ashley months now, and the conversations that have come off what we're focusing on is if we're talking.
00:10:16.620 --> 00:10:24.150 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Interesting in the most surreal or visceral conversations or reactions, we got from our those topics.
00:10:25.110 --> 00:10:36.720 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So i'm actually going to just talk about it, to say it outright 2020 was glorious year 2020 to 2021 glorious here, and if you're listening to me at this time.
00:10:37.380 --> 00:10:49.020 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: This time, we are still in this global pandemic that's going on but see your growth was a year for connection, how did you find it hello, what did you take.
00:10:50.400 --> 00:10:51.060 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: into right now.
00:10:51.570 --> 00:10:54.750 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So I was made for pandemics, I realized.
00:10:56.850 --> 00:11:07.650 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I am sort of i'm a secret loner so I I OK minus the sickness and all that let's act like that wasn't a part of the pandemic and it was just about staying home i'm even into the facemask.
00:11:08.010 --> 00:11:18.870 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Because like you can go out looking like complete crap and which I like to do, and you know look fine so that was perfect that was perfect for me um but seriously like I.
00:11:19.830 --> 00:11:28.800 Ella DeSosa-Butler: It was the first time, and I would say, like eight years, where I felt like I had a mental vacation and that was just amazing for me I.
00:11:29.850 --> 00:11:41.250 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I really sort of also felt like I achieve this balance between working life and motherhood and really got to spend some quality time and, like plug into my son and see where he's at because.
00:11:41.700 --> 00:11:51.690 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know the years previous I felt like it was just like work, did you get your homework done go to bed, it was all transactional I felt like a little bit, and you know, a whole bunch of I love us but.
00:11:52.350 --> 00:11:57.540 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Not that just that quiet time so that was it for me and then I also got.
00:11:57.900 --> 00:12:10.680 Ella DeSosa-Butler: A lot of projects that had kind of been stewing in the background, you know little side things you're like Oh, I want to do this, I want to try that but you never have time to do I finally got to start a couple of those projects So for me it's been a good year.
00:12:13.050 --> 00:12:23.280 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I like that I like to hear that and I love this question that you asked us Keith about how was 2020 a good year, even though it was half horrible half okay.
00:12:23.850 --> 00:12:26.730 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: For me, the biggest thing that happened in 2020 was just.
00:12:27.090 --> 00:12:39.510 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Taking a chance on myself and starting my business it's something that I had been thinking about an ll you made a great point about how sometimes we have these ideas like we have this running to do list of wish list of things we can do.
00:12:39.870 --> 00:12:47.940 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: But because of the normal busy business of our routine we don't get to it so 2020 allowed me to get to the things that were on my list.
00:12:48.360 --> 00:12:53.970 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Namely, starting a business, and I just like starting it and saying Oh, this is a little cute little hobby like.
00:12:54.330 --> 00:13:03.660 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Running with it, to the point where now I am a solo entrepreneur of my own law firm and who would have thought that it would have happened during up and down.
00:13:04.260 --> 00:13:14.880 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: So there was a lot of growth in 2020 I know we want to get to on but let's go to a quick commercial break and then keep you can come back and tell us how 2020 was amazing for you.
00:16:14.100 --> 00:16:20.310 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: we're back just before we were on commercial I was talking about how 2021 year.
00:16:21.090 --> 00:16:33.300 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Despite the pandemic, it was a good year because I got to start my business Keith What about you, I know 2020 was a challenging year, but it was also a growth year for you like what what really works for you last year.
00:16:34.050 --> 00:16:51.450 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I think what worked for me was the loss of certain people and certain concepts in my life, so it was a great transition care for me as well, which was amazing because it made it more of a year clarity than anything else, so I got to actually be closer to family so in the middle of.
00:16:52.980 --> 00:16:58.380 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: New York City, because this was actually where my family wasn't I wanted to be closer to their making something.
00:16:58.920 --> 00:17:08.400 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Or, just in case I could be of assistance, and they can be of assistance to me and I ended up actually finishing a project that I.
00:17:08.910 --> 00:17:18.210 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Thought ever conceived of five years ago, so finally gone the information technology to actually put it out there as well, so that's a big accomplishment year for me as well.
00:17:18.660 --> 00:17:34.560 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Like I got the time to focus it down focus and also just take out the extra noise, because of the lack of distraction, or the lack of consistency that was there before probably and that just clarified a lot.
00:17:35.700 --> 00:17:42.390 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Greater it's still agree here actually so it's going on and i'm probably the most optimistic what kind of story.
00:17:42.900 --> 00:17:43.290 Okay.
00:17:45.660 --> 00:17:48.000 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: But I don't know I make no apologies.
00:17:48.630 --> 00:17:55.440 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: No good, and you know what's interesting people listening to this will probably be like you moved to New York during the pandemic.
00:17:56.340 --> 00:18:09.960 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Many people were trying to escape right and you actually not that we're in the belly of the beast I feel like at one point New York in terms of the whole country was like the belly of the beast right, so you came into Cuomo and.
00:18:11.700 --> 00:18:19.620 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: wit came into the belly of the beast like that's crazy that's that's radical like that's radical growth most persons wouldn't do that then.
00:18:19.620 --> 00:18:20.010 Because.
00:18:21.420 --> 00:18:22.800 Even if their family was here.
00:18:23.820 --> 00:18:33.330 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I mean it was it was a little bit was already going to happen to this just burn it off, so it was a very kind of it was disruptive don't get me wrong.
00:18:33.630 --> 00:18:44.940 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: But it was disruptive in a good way because it forced me to get rid of all the excess and so it's like let's move it made it easier for me to move at that point, and this is why it's a little bit.
00:18:46.290 --> 00:18:56.280 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Just it that's why it's probably gave me so much clarity, because it allowed me to take stock of everything that was going on and got rid of the things that weren't working at all right, and so.
00:18:59.160 --> 00:19:07.650 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I love what you just said about it was going to happen anyway, so I feel like 2020 like exposed to things that were in the rumblings in the background, anyway.
00:19:07.950 --> 00:19:17.460 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: The projects that were in the background, the fears the anxieties the hopes, like, I felt like 2020 put a spotlight on it, so I had been tinkering with the business.
00:19:18.030 --> 00:19:26.640 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: But it like made me full go full force you know headfirst and i'm sure ella you are tinkering with some things and it made you actually focus on it so.
00:19:27.030 --> 00:19:35.970 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: 2020 probably outside of like the pandemic, like the loss of life, I think it just exacerbated the things that were cooking in the background, anyway.
00:19:36.300 --> 00:19:40.740 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: mm hmm absolutely like I don't know for you as well, too, but.
00:19:41.460 --> 00:19:49.530 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: It got it like when I keep saying that it created clarity is the fact that maybe you know I know for my own friends, when I was talking to them.
00:19:49.890 --> 00:19:57.930 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: The they got to see where they're coping mechanisms or what they were using for coping mechanisms, whether it was food drugs going out.
00:19:58.680 --> 00:20:09.330 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You know people, people were coping mechanisms for other people like their associations their attachments like I don't really need this friend, because now I can't really see them we're not in those same social circles anyway.
00:20:09.780 --> 00:20:15.120 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: What did I really get from them so every relationship or every connection that I had.
00:20:15.690 --> 00:20:35.430 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Pre pandemic got either closer or disappeared, depending on where they were in my life at that point so when I tell you like it's a it's a filtered group it's a good group it's like everybody is on the same like vibe at this point and that's probably why i'm it's easier to flow from.
00:20:36.750 --> 00:20:37.290 Ella DeSosa-Butler: An interesting.
00:20:38.190 --> 00:20:41.640 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Did you feel that like did you like change relationships with people.
00:20:41.820 --> 00:20:57.360 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Yes, I was actually I was actually going to say something that you said about just kind of like cutting off the fat I actually had a conversation with somebody and where we you know we've been spending a lot of time together, and I mean it's still my friend, but I said.
00:20:58.500 --> 00:21:09.870 Ella DeSosa-Butler: From now on, I just want to spend time with people that are emotionally gratifying maybe you know i'm giving something to them or they're giving something to me there's at night, you know gratifying exchange.
00:21:10.530 --> 00:21:23.400 Ella DeSosa-Butler: adding something to my business or there was a third thing and I forget, but like basically you know those those three buckets if it's if it's something else I just don't have time for it, you know because I think, especially as entrepreneurs.
00:21:24.570 --> 00:21:36.030 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know we're busy doing one on ones and meetings and running to and fro and sometimes you have to step back and go, is this really adding to me, or is this just another coffee meeting like an empty coffee meeting right.
00:21:36.630 --> 00:21:51.450 Ella DeSosa-Butler: That you could be spending time you know working out or which adds to you or with really good friends or with my son so really just kind of valuing my time more um and yeah that's I definitely have done that so.
00:21:52.590 --> 00:21:53.940 Ella DeSosa-Butler: that's a big bonus.
00:21:55.320 --> 00:22:05.880 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: One of the things that both of you have said that just really points out sticks out to me is the pandemic really made me realize how much I need people.
00:22:06.750 --> 00:22:12.540 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Maybe I need to shift the seat at the table, maybe I didn't need all the people, but we need people, which is why our pod.
00:22:13.140 --> 00:22:20.100 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: The fact that we meet every morning came right on time, because I was literally like pacing, the floor is, in my one bedroom apartment in downtown brooklyn right.
00:22:20.610 --> 00:22:26.100 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: um but being able to connect with you girls every single morning to talk business to talk personal.
00:22:26.910 --> 00:22:34.140 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: allowed me to reconnect again, but not just with anybody to Ellis point, like every connected with don't people who I genuinely.
00:22:34.500 --> 00:22:43.890 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: wanted to connect with not like i'm connecting with you because your office happens to be next to my office on the fifth floor right, so I love that and you girls helped me.
00:22:44.820 --> 00:22:53.640 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: rearrange them re prioritize my goals, so I wanted to ask like you keep the podcast you mentioned earlier, not the pod our pod.
00:22:54.090 --> 00:23:07.800 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: You mentioned earlier that it's a great way, to be held accountable, the to set your goals like how How does this help you set your goals what goals have you set because of the fact that we hold each other accountable.
00:23:08.670 --> 00:23:15.750 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So it was the daily accountability right so there's a difference between busy work which you're just filling your days with.
00:23:16.170 --> 00:23:25.470 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And then the actual work that you're moving the needle with right whether it's deepening relationships and people with people or it's actually working on a project your side hustle.
00:23:25.830 --> 00:23:30.960 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Your your passion project that you really enjoy or really want to actually.
00:23:31.170 --> 00:23:39.240 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: put out in that world so that's the part that really helped me actually scope a lot better like decide like we only have three you can only do three right.
00:23:39.420 --> 00:23:48.390 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So the first one has to be the most important thing that has to get done it could be important, or it could be just urgent and remember it doesn't have to be someone else's urgent.
00:23:48.810 --> 00:23:55.950 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: matter it's your urgency right so some people try to like vomit on you, with their urgency in emergencies and things of that nature and it's like no.
00:23:56.340 --> 00:24:03.870 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: This is my stuff I want to put this out there, this is the number one thing that I need to get up the second and the third are the most.
00:24:04.500 --> 00:24:14.970 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Important first ones urgent second and third and most important things I need to get done and after that everything else is just nice to have let's get it done if you can, if not these.
00:24:15.360 --> 00:24:24.150 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: These three things, how many of y'all have started a to do list and it's like 12 deep or even what lily you were telling me about this yesterday that 31 points.
00:24:27.630 --> 00:24:34.830 Ella DeSosa-Butler: i've gotten paid I have I there have been times in my life, where i've had like pages and pages of a to do list where i'm like my mind, is just a jumble.
00:24:35.250 --> 00:24:35.820 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know I just.
00:24:36.060 --> 00:24:38.160 Ella DeSosa-Butler: read that point you just take it you throw it out.
00:24:40.230 --> 00:24:50.550 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: You feel like a failure, you might have gotten to really good things on that list, but because there's so many left over, you just human you just feel like oh I didn't do anything today.
00:24:51.180 --> 00:24:59.280 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Right so that's the part where when you when we just have the three because all of us have lives to lead we're not trying to keep you accountable on all your 31.
00:24:59.520 --> 00:25:10.230 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Second, but it also shows you where you need to delegate I can't get this done, I have to multiply myself or pay someone to go do these things that are not adding to my zone of genius.
00:25:10.440 --> 00:25:17.550 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Which is really also This helped me this accountability group helped me realize what was my zone of genius and what was my zone of.
00:25:18.420 --> 00:25:31.050 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Excellence okay excellence is there's a fine line in that in the fact that you might be great at something, but it might not let you walk it might not be moving the needle where a zone of genius is your true passion your true.
00:25:31.650 --> 00:25:41.790 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: output that you're actually great at and what you actually can move the needle with right and people get confused because they spend a lot of time on the zone of excellence question because they're like oh.
00:25:42.060 --> 00:25:47.040 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: i'm getting validated through this i'm getting paid for this, but this seems like busy work that seems like.
00:25:47.310 --> 00:25:58.380 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You know extra work for me right, and then, when you really start to focus on the zone of genius so this accountability group allowed me to see what was, I really what really lights me up and then to delegate the.
00:25:58.380 --> 00:25:58.770 rest.
00:26:02.700 --> 00:26:06.450 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: i'm going to steal your zone, I remember, we had brunch we were.
00:26:06.720 --> 00:26:09.360 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: We were in Dublin battle water.
00:26:10.590 --> 00:26:17.070 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: What it was well used for that was the first time I heard the distinction between zone of genius and zone of excellence so.
00:26:17.640 --> 00:26:30.690 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Our pod our daily accountability group has helped me really focus on my zone of genius versus my zone of excellence, so now, when I do any goal setting i'm like Okay, is this an excellent goal, or is this a genius ago.
00:26:31.290 --> 00:26:41.460 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And i'm trying to have more genius goals than excellent goals, I think, to a certain extent, you need both, especially when you're running your own shopping you're essentially the brains of your own operation.
00:26:41.970 --> 00:26:47.190 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And you can't outsource every single thing, although, let me know if I can because i'd be the person to try.
00:26:48.750 --> 00:26:57.360 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: i'm with you the minute I find out i'm just telling everybody how to do this because i'm still trying to take on the whole show for myself and i'm like I don't need this, I need to do this.
00:26:57.990 --> 00:26:59.610 Ella DeSosa-Butler: But you're the meaning of outsourcing.
00:27:00.450 --> 00:27:00.870 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Like if.
00:27:01.020 --> 00:27:05.310 Ella DeSosa-Butler: you're really good at you know letting things go that you don't need to be doing.
00:27:06.060 --> 00:27:06.390 Most.
00:27:08.430 --> 00:27:20.400 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Of the time right because you just don't have the time, but things need to get done so you just at this point it's not serving me it's making it worse for me to hold on to it right, rather than.
00:27:21.360 --> 00:27:27.180 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You know just let it go like what's it doing it's not my ego at stake, I had to let go of my ego first to let go of the tasks.
00:27:27.840 --> 00:27:36.330 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And you have to figure out what kind of business owner, you want to be, because I remember explaining this to a girlfriend who felt like if she owned a business, she would want to be involved in every single detail.
00:27:36.540 --> 00:27:49.170 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: because she was getting fulfillment in her identity was wrapped in her business and i'm like I want to have everyone do everything and just run it by me and make sure my checks are in my checking account like that's the type of business.
00:27:51.000 --> 00:27:57.840 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: That that that's what i'm trying to do here that's what i'm trying to do here let's take a quick commercial break ladies and they will be back with more.
00:27:59.310 --> 00:27:59.970 Ella DeSosa-Butler: sounds good.
00:28:01.230 --> 00:28:02.640 Radio nyc.
00:30:45.510 --> 00:30:49.590 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Welcome back welcome back during the commercial break the ladies and I were talking about.
00:30:49.590 --> 00:30:54.270 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How sometimes entrepreneurship can feel a little isolating.
00:30:55.320 --> 00:31:07.050 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: 2020 and definitely felt isolated right because you're literally doing everything by yourself, but even pre 2020 when you maybe are the only business owner in your group.
00:31:07.980 --> 00:31:17.880 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: and your family your friends, they support you they're like oh that's a good job, but they don't really know what it's like to run a business, sometimes it can be isolating that's why I really appreciated the fact that.
00:31:18.510 --> 00:31:27.030 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: We got together during a pandemic, to support each other, because I don't have anybody else who I can talk to about running a business.
00:31:28.770 --> 00:31:37.290 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And again i'm surrounded by people who love and support me and they believe in me but they're just not doing what i'm doing so I love for either one of you, ladies to talk about like.
00:31:38.190 --> 00:31:44.550 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How you built your tribe like we've we've built our 630 tribe right, but even before we met each other.
00:31:44.910 --> 00:31:51.510 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How did you go about building your tribe and what's the importance of that and what were you doing before you try what.
00:31:51.720 --> 00:32:00.540 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Were you doing afterwards, like there's no way we can do all of this by ourselves so i'd love for any one of you to talk about you know, entrepreneurship and how it's important to be around like minded people.
00:32:02.100 --> 00:32:10.350 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I mean i'll go so i'm a startup and small business attorney so i'm always surrounded by disruptive thinkers anyway, so in a weird way like.
00:32:10.740 --> 00:32:20.850 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I kind of attracted my tribe just by the type of law that I practice because it actively stimulates me as well too and i've got some of the best ideas from my clients is this through.
00:32:21.120 --> 00:32:37.560 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: theory of osmosis here just by being around them, I become more creative I become more stimulated I become more innovative for that and the people in my tribe and usually i'm the only lawyer in my group actually I know there's a fun fact, for this reason for this is because.
00:32:39.300 --> 00:32:43.080 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I find that everybody has a sense of creativity just has to come out in different ways.
00:32:43.350 --> 00:32:58.110 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And also lawyers get a bad rap So when I go out actually and I have this rule of eight o'clock rule I don't forget about like after 8pm if I met a social setting I actually don't say i'm a lawyer actually just don't bring up what I do for a living, I just if I have to fight.
00:32:59.130 --> 00:33:06.720 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I say i'm in retail or something which technically alarm we're all selling something here okay so let's not get into semantics, but.
00:33:07.440 --> 00:33:15.720 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Indeed, interesting to see how people react to that, but get to know people like now, I asked questions like, how do you feel your days not like.
00:33:16.020 --> 00:33:27.060 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: What do you do for a living right because it's such it's just one portion of one person right, so my tribe kind of keep out of who they were and have read if they were and so forth, so.
00:33:27.630 --> 00:33:42.300 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: He it was an evolving conversation with many different people that brought around this time you just find out the people that are aligned with what you're into at that time, or you know I firmly believe, and I keep saying, as I go I believe in unicorns i'm gonna put it out there.
00:33:43.440 --> 00:33:56.190 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: It just comes Okay, you know lily and i'm a conversation about how it's going to get an apartment in New York City, and I was like i'm gonna get this apartment for less than this much and that's going to happen, and she left she left.
00:33:58.560 --> 00:33:58.920 yeah.
00:34:00.960 --> 00:34:18.300 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: not the only one to an la and real estate and I told everybody that everybody knew in New York, I could get this apartment it's going to be for this about or less than this amount and then come August of last year, since I happened and it was like just want to let you go is this happening.
00:34:24.510 --> 00:34:31.560 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I believe you can believe in it, too, so it's something where I intentionally believe that something's going to happen and I go.
00:34:32.040 --> 00:34:42.720 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: by default by the people that are in my life, it just comes in, or just people actually introduced me to certain things that come into it yeah so intentionality probably brought their tribe as well.
00:34:45.090 --> 00:34:51.780 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I love, how you basically don't tell people that you're an attorney what i'm going to start doing i'm going to make up a random career like i'm a mechanic.
00:34:55.710 --> 00:35:00.630 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: asked me stuff a lot about carburetors and wheels and i'm like yeah bring it to my shop.
00:35:04.740 --> 00:35:12.240 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I don't like to talk about being an attorney either, namely because people, just like to freakin put you in a corner and ask you a whole bunch of questions that you'd like you're.
00:35:14.970 --> 00:35:20.160 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Talking about right i'm literally have a gin and tonic in my hand like I don't want to do this right now with you.
00:35:20.490 --> 00:35:22.980 Ella DeSosa-Butler: guys, so I don't talk about that too, but.
00:35:23.280 --> 00:35:25.020 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: i'm sorry Hello you're about to say.
00:35:25.980 --> 00:35:27.060 Ella DeSosa-Butler: My my dream.
00:35:27.120 --> 00:35:32.790 Ella DeSosa-Butler: is to have a whole bunch of lawyers and doctors in a room together and just like you know be like attacking them with.
00:35:34.950 --> 00:35:35.760 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: we're never going.
00:35:37.950 --> 00:35:40.110 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Oh, my gosh philly advice everywhere.
00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:42.720 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: This rash.
00:35:45.150 --> 00:35:45.630 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Totally.
00:35:46.830 --> 00:35:54.810 Ella DeSosa-Butler: um, so I am this question is very interesting to me, so my in most of my life I have been.
00:35:55.860 --> 00:36:12.390 Ella DeSosa-Butler: My I have not been selected about my tribe i'm like everyone's best friend, I want to hear about your problems and help you, with your problems I am like a mega impact, and I would say, all the way up until like my Lee like my 30s.
00:36:13.410 --> 00:36:23.700 Ella DeSosa-Butler: It was exhausting you know because I would just get so wrapped up into people's lives, and I mean I would meet people and i'd be like what do you want to do with your life, what are your hopes and dreams, let me help you I mean it was crazy.
00:36:25.260 --> 00:36:25.560 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So.
00:36:26.730 --> 00:36:38.430 Ella DeSosa-Butler: it's really in the past, I would say three years that I have learned to be intentional and I think it's interesting because I, I think I don't know if it's women but i'm going to say I think a lot of women were taught.
00:36:39.090 --> 00:36:50.880 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Like it's a part of enculturation maybe that we should be like super selfless so you know, like selfless is like this, this characteristic that's like you know number one that we should do with.
00:36:50.880 --> 00:36:51.990 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Words are feminine.
00:36:52.380 --> 00:37:03.060 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And what i've learned is to be self interested as well, no because being you know we think if you're self interested that that means you're selfish but.
00:37:03.390 --> 00:37:10.050 Ella DeSosa-Butler: A little bit of self in know a good amount a healthy amount of self interest is imperative to living a healthy life so.
00:37:10.530 --> 00:37:27.420 Ella DeSosa-Butler: that's you know what where i've been and where I am now and so i've taken those lessons to be very intentional about the people that i'm choosing to be around right now, so that they don't just suck you dry, you know what I actually read a really good quote the other day, it said.
00:37:29.010 --> 00:37:40.320 Ella DeSosa-Butler: something about if you're a giver learn to learn to know your limits and set your limits, because the takers don't have any and I that was like great so.
00:37:41.400 --> 00:37:56.970 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I love that I am my tribe has always been pretty organic as well, I feel people out and I don't know if i'm hasty to judge, but I can know pretty quickly if I like someone if I don't and if i've already decided that I don't like you I don't go back and revisit it like it's over.
00:37:58.290 --> 00:38:05.340 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: my mind isn't changed like six months later right, so the fact that i'm with you, ladies is like I like both of you from the very beginning.
00:38:05.790 --> 00:38:14.820 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And so that's how my tribe has been created, but now that i'm an entrepreneur to your point Li needs to be a little bit more intentional and.
00:38:15.540 --> 00:38:27.630 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: seek out people who are creative seek out people who are you know, entrepreneurs and they've overcome some type of stumbling block like just be around people who are positive and speak positivity.
00:38:28.140 --> 00:38:42.240 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: to you and to themselves, whereas before it was just like Oh, do I liked her do I not like you, that was the only measuring stick, but now it's do I, like you, too, I, like you, do I, like her, do I not like you and also what are you doing with yourself.
00:38:42.780 --> 00:38:43.440 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Like.
00:38:44.040 --> 00:38:54.450 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How, how are you growing, I think, naturally, I was i've always been attracted to those people, so I don't have like any friends and i'm like look at this bump calling me again like I don't have those.
00:38:57.000 --> 00:39:06.930 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: How did this person get my new number I don't have that right, but I do need to be more intentional about like seeking out people like you all, because you understand.
00:39:07.500 --> 00:39:18.660 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: What it's what it's like and you just understand what it's like to be out here, so I think that's one of the reasons why we love this part and we encourage other people to build their own part, because we know that it can be isolated.
00:39:19.380 --> 00:39:27.210 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Absolutely, and we, you know we have a couple of I guess ground rules that we pay work for our pod that if you want to build your pod.
00:39:27.690 --> 00:39:36.090 Ella DeSosa-Butler: would probably you know, please borrow they'd be good for you, the first is, I think we think three is our sweet spot in terms of number of people in the pod.
00:39:36.390 --> 00:39:50.040 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I know it works really well for us because there's enough noise where it's exciting, but not so much that it can be distracting you know, there are three voices there's time for everyone to speak, we have our calls every morning at 630.
00:39:50.640 --> 00:40:02.520 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And 630 call, so you know our calls are about I would say 30 to 45 minutes so with three people that definitely you know with that timeframe, we each have enough time to speak.
00:40:04.140 --> 00:40:12.480 Ella DeSosa-Butler: find people that are in three different industries, and you know, perhaps complementary industries to your own, I know that you and.
00:40:13.440 --> 00:40:24.870 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Lillian Sankey that you know they share and refer business to each other i'm a real estate agent so i've referred business to lily and you know it just all sort of it works we're all complimentary.
00:40:25.230 --> 00:40:33.060 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And then there was a third point, oh each week, the purpose of each call the main you know the meat of the call is the three goals that we have.
00:40:33.420 --> 00:40:46.800 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So we each select for ourselves the three most important things tasks that we want to accomplish that day and we each take turns you know telling the other.
00:40:47.130 --> 00:40:53.610 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know what they are and it's great because then the next day, when we speak, then we can say, did you did you finish this.
00:40:54.360 --> 00:41:04.710 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know and we're accountable to each other, and for me that works, because I it's funny like everybody has their you know their motivation I joke, with the girls and i'm motivated by shame.
00:41:08.850 --> 00:41:18.720 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Very simple person okay very simple i'm super Friday and so yeah I, like you know what i'm ashamed, the next day, then i'm like okay I gotta get my stuff together so.
00:41:19.350 --> 00:41:32.340 Ella DeSosa-Butler: It works, so you know I mean you know, think about your pod but oh here's a big one choose people like each the three of us are all you know different, but we can all tap into a similar frequency.
00:41:33.060 --> 00:41:44.130 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And I think that's super important so even though we're different we can all kind of tap into that frequency, where we you know there's like a synergy and so that's super important that you have people with.
00:41:44.790 --> 00:41:50.040 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know I don't want to say the same energy, but like I said, the ability to tap into a similar frequency.
00:41:50.310 --> 00:42:00.540 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I mean it even starts following along that starts a shared goal of your goals right start there and then extrapolate from there, like we also do something where our top.
00:42:01.140 --> 00:42:06.930 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: REP like at the piano on we talk about what we're planning to make for that year or sorry for that one.
00:42:07.530 --> 00:42:13.440 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Order we try to get together and talk about our quarter goals as well, too, so we had a planning session at the end of.
00:42:13.740 --> 00:42:26.100 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: December for 2021 and we just went to town, for I think we did it over to different sessions, where we did this on one personal on another side like two three hours and we got these big huge.
00:42:27.330 --> 00:42:32.640 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Post, it notes are posted boards and then we pointed out, we were at my house and we just put it all over.
00:42:34.260 --> 00:42:39.870 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: The walls and we talked through them and then we also critique each other, we help each other, be.
00:42:41.370 --> 00:42:49.260 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: The main aspect of that like how are you going to get this, what are you going to use to get this, what are the skills that you need to connect with.
00:42:49.620 --> 00:42:58.950 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And how are you going to get to that right and we're going to talk a little bit more about that wouldn't be we get back from this commercial break as well.
00:43:00.930 --> 00:43:04.200 are listening to talk radio nyc.
00:45:17.790 --> 00:45:21.060 Ella DeSosa-Butler: By the way, I love our music it's so like.
00:45:21.990 --> 00:45:27.600 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Some work into this everyone who's interested in starting a podcast understand that it's not easy.
00:45:28.680 --> 00:45:38.220 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: there's like a million podcast when you go on to like your server whether it's spotify or whatever you think people are just whipping it up, while they're cooking dinner no it's.
00:45:40.080 --> 00:45:40.830 Ella DeSosa-Butler: very true.
00:45:42.300 --> 00:45:42.930 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: it's a lot of work.
00:45:43.080 --> 00:45:46.830 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I love what King was talking about earlier about how we got together the end of the year.
00:45:47.220 --> 00:45:58.140 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I will tell everyone listening that you need someone like Keith on your team, because we put these big posters on the wall and we're writing our goals here I am like Oh, I want to make X and keep is like no.
00:46:00.510 --> 00:46:04.890 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: charge more for your services are like okay all right.
00:46:13.980 --> 00:46:21.660 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Before then I had food for them so they were ready for this Okay, because I feel that you need to charge what you're worth.
00:46:21.960 --> 00:46:35.370 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: and also to and I thought, like her value such so we both we saw that it was like no, you should be charging for this and we had to break it down about what that cost actually entails as well yeah right.
00:46:35.880 --> 00:46:47.160 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: You know why that was hard for me and other people, probably have experienced this as well, when you work in a corporate setting your salary tells you your work, your bonus tells you your work.
00:46:47.670 --> 00:46:58.560 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I know beforehand, no matter almost kind of no matter what I do i'm going to get this set amount of cash every two weeks, where i'm going to get this bonus every quarter or every year, however, it works out.
00:46:58.980 --> 00:47:15.060 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: When you're an entrepreneur, you have to set your goal as to what you want to make now you are valuing yourself, and it was very hard for me to do that, like what is the value of what I bring because someone has always told me what's my value and it's reflected in this.
00:47:16.710 --> 00:47:23.430 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And that and that's a hard thing to break out over you're waiting for the validation from external sources to tell you what your value is.
00:47:24.150 --> 00:47:32.100 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: But not just monetary but, like you, are as a person as well to let people like run their businesses the way they want their personal lives will be running parallel.
00:47:32.880 --> 00:47:39.930 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So that's why it's hard to also lesson I had to learn and I had some screaming in the background, as well, saying like hey.
00:47:40.320 --> 00:47:44.490 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Actually charge more you need to do this because of everything that goes in the background right.
00:47:44.880 --> 00:48:00.900 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And that was eye opening for me to stop putting the focus on how people perceive me and how they will perceive my value of myself and just put that out there and be like this is what it is right yeah actually do.
00:48:01.260 --> 00:48:04.170 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: session because it's about to be the end of the first quarter and i'm looking.
00:48:04.170 --> 00:48:07.290 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: at her monitor was like did I make that goal.
00:48:07.770 --> 00:48:08.670 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Does it look like it.
00:48:09.420 --> 00:48:09.570 Oh.
00:48:12.840 --> 00:48:13.560 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: don't worry.
00:48:18.030 --> 00:48:19.440 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: About scolded by.
00:48:22.260 --> 00:48:24.360 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Lead guiding loving guiding.
00:48:25.530 --> 00:48:26.580 Ella DeSosa-Butler: guiding okay.
00:48:27.780 --> 00:48:28.680 Ella DeSosa-Butler: we're we're calling it now.
00:48:30.300 --> 00:48:33.960 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Okay, there was a time that ella also was like how come you're not yelling at me.
00:48:40.830 --> 00:48:45.390 Ella DeSosa-Butler: everyone's like okay like i'm holding my psyche together with a rubber band can see.
00:48:46.500 --> 00:48:50.520 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: I can't help what you need lady Okay, you need something else besides.
00:48:51.600 --> 00:48:57.120 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: i'm just here, for your business everything else you know that there's professional hope for that i'm not licensed for that.
00:48:57.240 --> 00:49:06.570 Ella DeSosa-Butler: But you know what I was just thinking, and this is why talking to you guys is so great, because things just like come up like they will up ideas or thoughts that are so.
00:49:07.290 --> 00:49:15.840 Ella DeSosa-Butler: enlightening I was just thinking that a lot of time I think i'm a person that functions from a place of crisis.
00:49:16.440 --> 00:49:21.720 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And that's what this team has helped our pod has helped me with and when I say a place of crisis like.
00:49:22.290 --> 00:49:29.670 Ella DeSosa-Butler: You know I like when things are out of not out of control, but when I have a lot of stuff dumped on me and i'm like digging through it chopping it down, you know.
00:49:29.970 --> 00:49:37.440 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And I do well, I mean I complete projects and I make it happen, but internally it's just so stressful.
00:49:37.950 --> 00:49:46.740 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Externally, nobody would ever know right and what this pot has helped me do it's helped me get in front of things like speaking to you every day.
00:49:47.310 --> 00:50:04.740 Ella DeSosa-Butler: and setting those goals every day helps me to function, from a place of I you know being proactive in a place of planning, not a place of crisis which weirdly enough I probably feel quite comfortable in you know um so that's definitely something that's pot has helped me to do.
00:50:05.820 --> 00:50:06.060 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And I.
00:50:06.420 --> 00:50:13.800 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Never I would never have done that um the planning thing you know with the marvel you had us with the markers and the quarterly.
00:50:13.830 --> 00:50:16.110 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: blah blah the color coded.
00:50:16.200 --> 00:50:16.560 Ella DeSosa-Butler: It was.
00:50:16.860 --> 00:50:18.750 Ella DeSosa-Butler: color coded it was very intense guys.
00:50:19.140 --> 00:50:19.560 and
00:50:20.850 --> 00:50:32.700 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I would never have done that, because I function from a place of I just have to make money win, win, win, win and it's great because i'm winning but i'm not really setting out a blueprint for myself right and.
00:50:33.480 --> 00:50:42.630 Ella DeSosa-Butler: So I would never have done that, and you introduce me to sort of embracing that sort of planning, not that I never knew about it, but learning to feel more comfortable with it.
00:50:43.890 --> 00:50:44.550 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And I think that's.
00:50:45.570 --> 00:50:45.990 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Good.
00:50:47.010 --> 00:50:55.530 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I was just gonna say I love that she knows what her blueprint, and sometimes it serves you and sometimes it doesn't and you need to be able to pivot like everyone's you know what their business blueprint is.
00:50:56.490 --> 00:51:05.490 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: It should actually I think like for me it's a work in progress as well too so every month I tweak it and i'm like oh what work this month what worked what didn't and it's like.
00:51:05.820 --> 00:51:20.550 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: The pandemic and this pod allowed me to be more self aware as a business owner and as a human, and so there are things that i'm most considerate about with other people and were more aware of, too, so I can plan ahead for it too so.
00:51:21.000 --> 00:51:31.380 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: This is kind of that reciprocity, where you while you deep dive in yourself you're also able to be more aware of other people as a result as well too so there's a resulting mirror that comes up.
00:51:31.830 --> 00:51:37.380 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And that's been a great addition for the pod for me as well too because it's forced me to.
00:51:37.860 --> 00:51:48.270 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Normally I felt isolated, I thought I was the only one that was writing this out, but to eight to talk it out like ella just brought up ideas come up because of the fact that we're talking in such a synergistic.
00:51:48.990 --> 00:51:58.560 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Like frequency, if anything, and ideas come up, and you know I go into my own world where it's like, and I think about things throughout the day I was like ooh I should use these women as a sounding board.
00:51:59.070 --> 00:52:06.480 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Because that's also the pod to write what do you guys think about this, how would you approach this issue, I have this issue with a colleague.
00:52:07.560 --> 00:52:20.340 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: You know, obviously nothing confidential just discussed but it's more about the concepts more about the actionable ways that you could deal with it, and sometimes it's also the reality check I was like my crazy did y'all.
00:52:20.880 --> 00:52:27.540 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: What I saw was crazy did you think I should have said something different, you know when you're like in FLEX your voice in your life so.
00:52:29.940 --> 00:52:30.510 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Right.
00:52:30.930 --> 00:52:43.590 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: yeah and it's it's that it's that reality check that comes every morning that rain or shine you still got to get up and you know show up to these people as well too so it's not for the faint of heart i'll say that okay.
00:52:44.670 --> 00:52:49.440 Ella DeSosa-Butler: And and honestly like there are many mornings, where i'm like I gotta call these checks at six their.
00:52:49.440 --> 00:52:51.450 Ella DeSosa-Butler: APP yeah end of the call.
00:52:52.590 --> 00:52:53.730 Ella DeSosa-Butler: That was amazing.
00:52:53.940 --> 00:53:00.660 Ella DeSosa-Butler: yeah so it's kind of like a workout when you get there sometimes you're not into it, but at the end you feel so great so.
00:53:01.170 --> 00:53:05.850 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Because, and you know there's sometimes that I started the call under the covers like i'm here.
00:53:07.200 --> 00:53:07.560 Ella DeSosa-Butler: Right.
00:53:08.100 --> 00:53:08.310 Like.
00:53:09.870 --> 00:53:11.310 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: i'm here that's all you get into.
00:53:13.920 --> 00:53:20.010 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Like we're all dead lily's the only one that's like hi i'm up here we are, because apparently she gets it before.
00:53:20.340 --> 00:53:20.820 I know.
00:53:23.160 --> 00:53:40.080 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: It helps me i'm really good in the morning, like every like you said, like I said you got to know your business blueprint and I can't start deep diving into a complicated document at 7pm it's going to look like gobbledygook, but I can do it, I am so I need to get up early.
00:53:41.880 --> 00:53:42.300 Ella DeSosa-Butler: huh.
00:53:43.980 --> 00:53:44.520 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Anyhow.
00:53:46.470 --> 00:53:49.200 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: don't don't dismiss my my miracle morning routine.
00:53:49.260 --> 00:53:50.580 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: we're gonna have a whole different.
00:53:51.690 --> 00:53:55.020 Ella DeSosa-Butler: miracle morning I feel like that to be like, can you try.
00:53:55.470 --> 00:53:56.190 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: To read a book.
00:53:58.650 --> 00:53:59.670 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: it's a book, it is a.
00:54:00.690 --> 00:54:02.280 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: chicken chicken the letter.
00:54:03.150 --> 00:54:05.910 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: I did not miracle morning by our.
00:54:07.230 --> 00:54:09.150 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: l RON change my life.
00:54:09.690 --> 00:54:10.290 Okay.
00:54:12.390 --> 00:54:16.770 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So there's a lot of there's a lot of stuff about getting up in the morning and doing things.
00:54:17.400 --> 00:54:28.650 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And starting early morning pages, you know writing writing in your journal doing a workout in the morning drinking green juice in the morning everything's to set you up for the rest of your day Benjamin hardy talks about that.
00:54:28.950 --> 00:54:39.180 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Okay, Dr Benjamin already talks about journaling in the morning, so actually to prime yourself, for the rest of the day and doing your to do list at the night before so you get up going.
00:54:40.770 --> 00:54:48.210 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: So I mean it's been great talking about this for it with all you ladies and so everyone can actually be introduced to the whole pod idea.
00:54:48.480 --> 00:54:58.860 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: And how you can actually move forward with your own as well, so you can do this, too, we've talked about it, and it will be in our show notes as well, and we just want to kind of wrap this up with some closing thoughts as well.
00:54:59.370 --> 00:55:06.930 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: One of the best quotes that i've read in a long time, especially after this past year, having the pandemic having a very, very.
00:55:07.350 --> 00:55:17.880 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: visceral reaction having a visceral reaction to the election okay we've had many different viewpoints come up and apparently in a pod you're going to have the viewpoints as well, but.
00:55:18.240 --> 00:55:23.250 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: there's this beautiful quote by Scott Fitzgerald that says the true test of intelligence.
00:55:24.030 --> 00:55:37.320 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Is the ability to hold two opposing ideas and thoughts and still maintain your sanity maintain your peace of mind at that, too, so I mean we've had a lot of provoking things happen over the past year right and it's always been great to.
00:55:37.980 --> 00:55:50.730 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: come to a place of our Community and come to a place of like understanding everyone's point of view, and this pot has helped me in doing that and i'll leave it to you girls, what do you think how to close this off and how this part is really helped you.
00:55:51.870 --> 00:55:53.070 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: hello, I let you go.
00:55:53.550 --> 00:56:05.250 Ella DeSosa-Butler: um I think it's just you know, having a good having a sounding board every morning, I have a sounding board and there are people that I trust, respect and.
00:56:05.970 --> 00:56:16.080 Ella DeSosa-Butler: I know that they're really listening to what i'm saying and giving me, you know heartfelt personal or professional advice and it's just a really great way to start your day.
00:56:16.620 --> 00:56:18.060 Sankeetha Selvarajah Esq.: Just a lowly place.
00:56:18.720 --> 00:56:25.980 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: For me i'll say you're very powerful everyone is more powerful than they think they are and we just need to get around the right people and get rid of.
00:56:27.300 --> 00:56:28.620 him lean into how powerful.
00:56:31.260 --> 00:56:34.680 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: Thank you all for joining our first episode yay.
00:56:35.880 --> 00:56:36.510 We made it.
00:56:38.970 --> 00:56:40.590 Lillie N. Nkenchor, Esq., LL.M: And you will see you all next week.