Thursdays 5:00pm - 6:00pm (EDT)
EPISODE SUMMARY:
After a long time of commitment to your aging parents, once they have transitioned, you sense grief and loss of self. With resiliency, creativity and agency, you can reclaim your identity. The audience will learn 2 examples of how to recover in one instance and prepare in another.
Author, mental health therapist and attorney Annie Guest takes us on her journey to process grief over her parents’ final struggles and appreciate the fullness of their lives. It has also helped her take stock of her own life and find her way forward.
Guest takes us through her journey of reinterpretation in DESIGN FOR YOUR MIND: How a Family Caregiver and Mental Health Therapist Renovated her Home to Recharge Her Life—and Didn’t Break the Bank (B.D. Walsh Publishing) and shows us the magic of how she transformed her home sustainably and on a budget.
Website:
https://www.annieguestdesignforyourmind.com/
Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Design-Your-Mind-Caregiver-Therapist/dp/B0DVRGQQFT
#Designforyourmind, #burnout, #resilency
Tune in for this healthy conversation at TalkRadio.nyc
In this episode of Frank About Health, host Frank R. Harrison welcomes Annie Guest, a mental health therapist and former caregiver, to explore the emotional journey of recharging one's life after caregiving. Annie shares her personal story of caring for aging parents with Parkinson's and dementia, navigating burnout, and ultimately reclaiming her identity through the creative process of redesigning her inherited home. Together, they shed light on subtle signs of caregiver burnout, the challenges of estate management, and how creativity and therapeutic insight can aid in emotional recovery and personal renewal.
In segment two of Frank About Health, Annie Guest shares how her passion for interior design became a powerful tool in her recovery from caregiver burnout. As she navigated the emotional and logistical challenges of clearing out and renovating her inherited family home, she began documenting the transformation—eventually inspiring her to write Design for Your Mind. Blending therapeutic insight with creative expression, Annie shows how thoughtful design and personal passion can help caregivers reclaim their identity, connect with loved ones, and rebuild a sense of freedom after years of self-sacrifice.
In this third segment of Frank About Health, Annie Guest expands on how reclaiming her space through interior design helped her heal emotionally and spiritually after years of caregiving and grief. She and Frank delve into the importance of accepting reality, facing loss with courage, and using creativity and self-awareness to rediscover purpose and joy. Annie emphasizes that resilience is built by honoring your needs—like nutrition, exercise, sleep, and social connection—and by stacking habits that serve multiple aspects of well-being, all while preserving meaningful family ties and avoiding isolation.
In the final segment of Frank About Health, Annie Guest shares how her journey of healing continues through home redesign and advocacy, offering practical advice for caregivers on setting boundaries and communicating needs—especially with siblings. She emphasizes the importance of addressing caregiver burnout by planning breaks, seeking help, and asserting your own well-being as essential, not optional. Listeners are encouraged to visit her websitehttps://www.annieguestdesignforyourmind.com for more resources, blog updates, and access to her book, Design for Your Mind, which empowers caregivers to reclaim their space, voice, and vitality through creativity and intentional living.
00:00:53.170 --> 00:01:02.769 Frank R. Harrison: Hey, everyone, and welcome to a new episode of Frank about health. Today is July 10, th 2025. Today's episode is called recharging your life after caregiving.
00:01:02.810 --> 00:01:20.879 Frank R. Harrison: Today's guest, is Eddie. Yes, and she is definitely going to be providing a multifaceted discussion right here on Frank about health. If you remember, I said, this is the season where, when you're faced with disruption, what are you going to do about it? And so she is going to talk about her story.
00:01:20.880 --> 00:01:35.579 Frank R. Harrison: where she was an actual caregiver for her parents, and when they passed on it provided all of the nuances of grief and disjointed feelings of what was going to happen next, and she did something about it.
00:01:35.580 --> 00:01:50.180 Frank R. Harrison: She wrote a book about it which we're going to discuss the book in detail during the show, and she's also going to use her expertise in the mental health field to help discuss some of the creative outlets that can help all of us who are caregivers, myself included.
00:01:50.180 --> 00:02:05.630 Frank R. Harrison: deal with whatever challenges, resiliency factors try to tap into your creativity. Also try to understand if you are approaching burnout. What could be some of the subtle signs so you could do something about it before it gets to a point of
00:02:05.630 --> 00:02:22.210 Frank R. Harrison: no return, and I'd hate to say no return, but an extreme point. All right. That being said, let me give you 1st a brief bio on Annie Guest, because she is multifaceted, just like the work that she has had to do with writing the book and also doing caregiving with her parents.
00:02:22.400 --> 00:02:34.100 Frank R. Harrison: She is the author of design for your mind how a family caregiver and mental health therapist renovated her home to recharge her life and didn't break the bank.
00:02:34.220 --> 00:02:46.649 Frank R. Harrison: A mental health therapist and attorney. She inherited her house after her parents had passed away. And this is her story of how she brought new life to the house for a new resident herself.
00:02:46.880 --> 00:02:58.500 Frank R. Harrison: and how she reclaimed her identity while doing it. Now let me issue my formal disclaimer. This is an experience coming from someone who wrote about it.
00:02:58.520 --> 00:03:11.669 Frank R. Harrison: This is not the thoughts and views of talkradio, Dot, Nyc. Or of Frank about health, but you know the way. I always provide my viewing audience and listening audience with top level individuals.
00:03:11.670 --> 00:03:36.290 Frank R. Harrison: who are also in the mindset of advocating and creating change and providing additional information that you may or may not have at your own will. So we're giving information that if you choose to not accept, that's your choice. But we're not trying to force feed you anything other than providing food for thought and for hopefully assistance in whatever challenges you.
00:03:36.400 --> 00:03:50.379 Frank R. Harrison: That's kind of a long, winded disclaimer. But I think I needed to do that in this case. So, Annie, welcome to Frank about health when you unmute yourself. I'd like you to tell the audience exactly about your story, and how things evolved.
00:03:54.770 --> 00:03:59.969 Annie Guest: Thank you, Frank, for having me. Could I? Could I join in with my own disclaimer?
00:04:00.130 --> 00:04:01.430 Frank R. Harrison: Absolutely.
00:04:02.190 --> 00:04:10.359 Annie Guest: Anything that I say during this segment is not intended as an offering of
00:04:10.860 --> 00:04:22.889 Annie Guest: mental health therapy. It is not a session. And it. I'm offering it only to describe my own personal experience
00:04:23.800 --> 00:04:34.149 Annie Guest: as a family caregiver who was experiencing some burnout and was able to construct a way out of it, using my own professional experience.
00:04:34.780 --> 00:04:35.460 Frank R. Harrison: Awesome.
00:04:35.460 --> 00:04:35.735 Annie Guest: Yeah.
00:04:37.660 --> 00:04:45.720 Frank R. Harrison: So that, all being said, how do you want to approach your story from the point when your parents were still here? Or after they had
00:04:45.830 --> 00:04:46.990 Frank R. Harrison: transitioned.
00:04:47.869 --> 00:04:52.960 Annie Guest: I would start with when my parents were still here, because that really sets up
00:04:53.790 --> 00:05:06.629 Annie Guest: the conditions that we want to discuss. I'm the oldest child of 4, and obviously a daughter, and I lived in the house next door to my parents. My dad had Parkinson's
00:05:06.960 --> 00:05:24.019 Annie Guest: in his later years my mom had difficulty with walking for a long time it was with she was walking with a walker, and then eventually she was using a wheelchair, but towards the end, over the last 5 years of her life she developed dementia.
00:05:24.690 --> 00:05:25.390 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:05:27.020 --> 00:05:45.160 Annie Guest: For a long time. I was the only caregiver for my parents, because they were resistant to bringing anyone else into the house, and some of your listeners may be familiar with this pattern.
00:05:45.270 --> 00:06:08.530 Annie Guest: They didn't. My parents didn't want to spend the money. They thought they were more comfortable with me in the house. They didn't want to disclose their conditions. They were both very proud, and as long as I was there to provide these services they were perfectly happy to have me provide them.
00:06:09.020 --> 00:06:09.660 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:06:10.160 --> 00:06:18.080 Annie Guest: And that was challenging because I was holding down a full time job.
00:06:19.721 --> 00:06:27.700 Annie Guest: Eventually I went back to grad school and was to become a mental health therapist.
00:06:27.840 --> 00:06:36.650 Annie Guest: and it was dealing with homework and papers and exams and
00:06:37.810 --> 00:06:45.690 Annie Guest: so the resistance to having anyone else in the house continued. I would have conference calls with my siblings.
00:06:46.750 --> 00:06:52.460 Annie Guest: And we talk about the various issues with our parents, health driving included.
00:06:53.817 --> 00:07:04.982 Annie Guest: They're driving included. And we would figure out how we could approach them about hiring a a caregiver
00:07:06.570 --> 00:07:22.572 Annie Guest: even for a few hours a week, and then we'd be excited when they relented. And we think, you know, we we prepared this this script and we get. We thought we really accomplished something, only to find that they fired the person within 2 days.
00:07:23.430 --> 00:07:28.760 Annie Guest: There's nothing unique about this situation. I hear it from people
00:07:28.950 --> 00:07:31.740 Annie Guest: with elderly parents all the time.
00:07:34.260 --> 00:07:40.510 Annie Guest: Eventually, as my dad's. Parkinson's progressed, they
00:07:40.670 --> 00:07:52.840 Annie Guest: hired a caregiver, a professional caregiver, who took over some of these responsibilities, but I was still primarily responsible for being the eyes and ears
00:07:54.500 --> 00:08:02.340 Annie Guest: and overseeing what might have been going on with the caregiver and and the and the new team.
00:08:02.800 --> 00:08:03.990 Frank R. Harrison: Right, right.
00:08:05.430 --> 00:08:09.519 Annie Guest: By as time went on.
00:08:11.970 --> 00:08:21.550 Annie Guest: I found that I was of feeling rather numb and
00:08:22.916 --> 00:08:41.660 Annie Guest: we, with the many trips to the emergency room in the middle of the night, and the weeks in rehab after a fall and the loss of sleep, because one of the features of Parkinson's is insomnia. So my dad would be calling me
00:08:41.669 --> 00:09:01.029 Annie Guest: every night in the middle of the night. A feeling that my just keeping up with my own personal responsibilities was very difficult. Paying bills, keeping my house clean. I was taking care of eventually taking care of my own clients.
00:09:01.888 --> 00:09:04.560 Annie Guest: But and I
00:09:04.980 --> 00:09:15.500 Annie Guest: I really was fighting to make sure that everybody I was responsible for got a hundred percent of me. But there was very little left for myself.
00:09:15.800 --> 00:09:17.200 Frank R. Harrison: Right, right.
00:09:18.360 --> 00:09:25.110 Annie Guest: My dad died, and 4 years later my mom died of the complications of her dementia.
00:09:25.830 --> 00:09:26.330 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:09:27.660 --> 00:09:30.979 Annie Guest: And this was during Covid.
00:09:31.710 --> 00:09:32.370 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:09:35.610 --> 00:09:43.520 Annie Guest: And my sister and brothers and I were the co-executors of the estate.
00:09:43.770 --> 00:09:51.010 Annie Guest: So it fell to my sister and me, the only 2 of us.
00:09:52.110 --> 00:09:54.979 Annie Guest: the only 2 siblings living in the State.
00:09:55.230 --> 00:10:00.670 Annie Guest: to clean out the house work with the appraiser, work with the auctioneer
00:10:01.730 --> 00:10:10.399 Annie Guest: all of that, so that took a long time. One of the challenges that I hear about
00:10:10.980 --> 00:10:15.690 Annie Guest: from other people whose parents were elderly is
00:10:16.460 --> 00:10:27.780 Annie Guest: that they accumulate a lot of stuff, and as their their health declines as they lose their energy and their physical ability, they don't keep up with just regular purging.
00:10:28.700 --> 00:10:33.109 Annie Guest: whether and they don't. No one has to be a hoarder to have this happen.
00:10:33.430 --> 00:10:34.170 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:10:34.430 --> 00:10:39.893 Annie Guest: So layers and layers and layers of stuff. We went through
00:10:40.520 --> 00:10:45.239 Annie Guest: and I was doing a lot of research into the various entities that would take
00:10:46.130 --> 00:10:50.600 Annie Guest: categories of donated items like unexpired medical equipment.
00:10:52.755 --> 00:10:55.695 Annie Guest: Hospital beds, books, furniture!
00:10:57.290 --> 00:11:02.620 Annie Guest: This was all after the siblings, and I had
00:11:04.280 --> 00:11:08.580 Annie Guest: received a report from the appraiser with the
00:11:09.060 --> 00:11:13.779 Annie Guest: mark estimated market value of each item on the property.
00:11:14.010 --> 00:11:14.670 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:11:15.070 --> 00:11:19.480 Annie Guest: We took the total, divided it into 4 into quarters.
00:11:20.320 --> 00:11:22.980 Frank R. Harrison: And each sibling had an allotment.
00:11:24.160 --> 00:11:30.310 Annie Guest: And through series of conference calls. Over months, months.
00:11:30.970 --> 00:11:41.799 Annie Guest: We went through the list in order, and each of us chose items over and over and over again. That's how we divide things. Anything left over could be donated.
00:11:42.190 --> 00:11:42.830 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:11:43.822 --> 00:11:45.780 Annie Guest: So the process.
00:11:46.270 --> 00:11:57.330 Annie Guest: the process is complex. And this was all engineered so that we wouldn't fight with each other. So it was worth the effort.
00:11:57.330 --> 00:11:58.125 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:11:58.920 --> 00:12:15.900 Annie Guest: I never wanted us to be these cliched siblings, you know, fighting over the estate, I mean. I just I never wanted that to happen to us, because long I would say this to my siblings long after Mom and dad are gone, we're going to be
00:12:16.400 --> 00:12:21.600 Annie Guest: a family unit. And I, it is really important that we're
00:12:21.900 --> 00:12:29.860 Annie Guest: that we're loving and are bonds. Stay strong. So let's make sure we set this up so we don't fight
00:12:30.780 --> 00:12:31.450 Frank R. Harrison: Correct.
00:12:32.380 --> 00:12:32.910 Annie Guest: Okay.
00:12:33.810 --> 00:12:41.799 Annie Guest: So finally, finally, after the house is cleared out, which is well over a year.
00:12:46.295 --> 00:12:52.439 Annie Guest: I have a chance to redesign it to redesign
00:12:52.840 --> 00:12:57.225 Annie Guest: the room. I inherited the house from my parents and
00:13:00.390 --> 00:13:12.010 Annie Guest: The process helped me, because during all these years of the caregiving and the co-executor functions.
00:13:12.120 --> 00:13:16.180 Annie Guest: I had really lost contact with myself.
00:13:19.030 --> 00:13:19.819 Annie Guest: And
00:13:22.130 --> 00:13:34.870 Annie Guest: I wanted to find myself again. I wanted to find my creativity. I wanted to remember the things that I used to be interested in the things I used to do. I'd been isolated socially.
00:13:35.447 --> 00:13:38.950 Annie Guest: By necessity. I mean, it's just what happens.
00:13:39.488 --> 00:13:45.319 Annie Guest: And I wanted to make the most of the years that I have left.
00:13:45.900 --> 00:13:47.270 Frank R. Harrison: Yes, yes.
00:13:47.480 --> 00:13:52.899 Annie Guest: It had a long, lifelong passion for interior design
00:13:53.390 --> 00:14:02.069 Annie Guest: since I was a little kid, and I was a mental health therapist, so I could look at what
00:14:03.300 --> 00:14:05.909 Annie Guest: what I had to do somewhat
00:14:06.080 --> 00:14:11.920 Annie Guest: objectively. But I do want to mention, Frank, that
00:14:12.060 --> 00:14:14.680 Annie Guest: when I was experiencing the burnout.
00:14:16.620 --> 00:14:19.330 Annie Guest: Even with my training I didn't recognize it.
00:14:20.420 --> 00:14:23.740 Annie Guest: I just felt guilty. I felt numb.
00:14:27.770 --> 00:14:34.949 Annie Guest: Flat, emotionally flat. I would go, was going through the motions. Everybody was being taken care of.
00:14:35.580 --> 00:14:36.310 Frank R. Harrison: But you.
00:14:36.610 --> 00:14:41.799 Annie Guest: But me, and I felt guilty because I didn't feel anything.
00:14:42.040 --> 00:14:48.060 Annie Guest: And I thought, What kind of monster are you? Don't you love your mom and dad.
00:14:50.090 --> 00:14:55.930 Frank R. Harrison: Well, it just brings up how powerful the brain really is when you're constantly living in survival mode.
00:14:56.480 --> 00:15:04.530 Frank R. Harrison: you know. But oh, but, by the way I see we are about to take our 1st break. But you did set up what our next section is about, which is a book
00:15:04.660 --> 00:15:26.789 Frank R. Harrison: that you wrote about explaining how you were able to find yourself again through your passion for interior design. So I'm going to show in our commercial break what the book looks like, and how people can either get it digitally or through paperback or hard copy. And then we're going to devote all of segment 2 to this episode
00:15:26.960 --> 00:15:51.129 Frank R. Harrison: to discussing the book, showing pictures of what you've done, and of course, using your mental therapy, your therapeutic experience, your mental health and therapeutic experience to describe how you were going through the recovery, which in itself I'm probably a student during the next section of the show. So, ladies and gentlemen.
00:15:51.130 --> 00:15:51.740 Annie Guest: No.
00:15:51.740 --> 00:15:57.729 Frank R. Harrison: Please stay tuned right here with with myself and Annie Guest on Frank about health.
00:15:57.940 --> 00:16:06.889 Frank R. Harrison: both on Talkradio, Dot, Nyc. And on our social media channels available on Youtube, Facebook, Linkedin and Twitch. We will be back in a few.
00:17:49.740 --> 00:17:55.390 Frank R. Harrison: Hey, everybody, and welcome back. So now is the moment of truth to learn all about
00:17:55.760 --> 00:18:15.979 Frank R. Harrison: design for your mind, Annie. Take it away. Let's let's discuss exactly how you were inspired to write the book. I know you said you wanted to find yourself again. You actually, of course, went through the changes with the home you inherited. But I gather you wrote the book after you had done that transition correct.
00:18:16.920 --> 00:18:23.969 Frank R. Harrison: Oh, you have to unmute 1st so unmute your microphone.
00:18:25.520 --> 00:18:33.559 Annie Guest: I didn't wait till after I had. I had made all the changes. I didn't even have the idea to write the book
00:18:33.700 --> 00:18:38.929 Annie Guest: until I was partly through this process.
00:18:39.480 --> 00:18:40.445 Frank R. Harrison: And
00:18:41.630 --> 00:18:47.060 Annie Guest: It's doing so much research to find how to donate items.
00:18:47.250 --> 00:18:51.880 Annie Guest: Right? That's I mean, that's not easy to to figure out
00:18:52.560 --> 00:18:59.679 Annie Guest: where who's going to take the hospital beds and the wheelchairs. I mean, it's a project.
00:18:59.960 --> 00:19:00.830 Annie Guest: Oh, no!
00:19:01.430 --> 00:19:12.330 Annie Guest: And so I was. I was doing so much work to to accomplish all of this.
00:19:12.730 --> 00:19:17.150 Annie Guest: that at some point I thought.
00:19:18.840 --> 00:19:25.160 Annie Guest: why should people who've spent years taking care of their parents, and then more years
00:19:25.801 --> 00:19:29.820 Annie Guest: as executors of the estate and cleaning out the house.
00:19:32.160 --> 00:19:40.339 Annie Guest: have to spend any more time doing it than necessary, the second part doing it than necessary, and if I can make it a little easier
00:19:40.560 --> 00:19:44.709 Annie Guest: for people to get back on their feet and recharge.
00:19:46.940 --> 00:19:49.700 Annie Guest: Maybe this information is going to be helpful.
00:19:50.250 --> 00:19:50.840 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:19:52.880 --> 00:19:54.170 Annie Guest: So
00:19:54.670 --> 00:20:08.859 Annie Guest: before I had the idea for the book I was, I would sit outside the house and study the architecture and try to figure out what it needed from me, and then inside I I would
00:20:09.220 --> 00:20:20.730 Annie Guest: decide what rooms needed to be lifted. For example, the den that I sent you a picture of and
00:20:23.320 --> 00:20:24.730 Annie Guest: fortunately.
00:20:25.256 --> 00:20:35.649 Annie Guest: I was looking for paint colors, so I would take pictures of rooms, and then I'd upload them onto the Benjamin Moore website in order to experiment with paint colors.
00:20:35.930 --> 00:20:36.530 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:20:36.860 --> 00:20:40.490 Annie Guest: And as I made some changes
00:20:42.050 --> 00:20:48.330 Annie Guest: and thought through a lot of these decisions, it occurred to me to write the book, use all
00:20:48.330 --> 00:21:01.839 Annie Guest: all that information about the wheelchairs and the paint colors, and I already had these before pictures because I'd taken them to put on the Benjamin Moore website, and from there it just got fun.
00:21:02.550 --> 00:21:05.729 Frank R. Harrison: Okay. Well, I'm gonna start sharing the pictures. I think
00:21:05.870 --> 00:21:10.900 Frank R. Harrison: we wanted to go 1st of all with the den, then the living room, then the atrium. Am I right?
00:21:10.900 --> 00:21:11.550 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:21:11.920 --> 00:21:12.820 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:21:13.210 --> 00:21:16.790 Frank R. Harrison: So here we have.
00:21:24.310 --> 00:21:26.969 Frank R. Harrison: Let's see here, it's a little slow. But
00:21:30.010 --> 00:21:32.500 Frank R. Harrison: here's the den before right.
00:21:32.770 --> 00:21:33.380 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:21:34.200 --> 00:21:35.100 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:21:41.930 --> 00:21:42.490 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:21:42.490 --> 00:21:45.859 Annie Guest: Frank. I don't see the I don't see the photo on my screen.
00:21:46.520 --> 00:21:47.793 Frank R. Harrison: Oh, okay.
00:21:48.430 --> 00:21:53.020 Annie Guest: Well, I know what it looks like, is it up.
00:21:53.670 --> 00:21:54.739 Frank R. Harrison: Okay, yes, it is.
00:21:54.740 --> 00:21:59.039 Annie Guest: Okay. Okay. The den was rather sad.
00:21:59.320 --> 00:22:10.300 Annie Guest: A space. Those curtains had been. You see, the curtains. They had been hanging there since before my parents moved into the House in 1997.
00:22:10.930 --> 00:22:11.600 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:22:11.878 --> 00:22:13.270 Annie Guest: They had holes in them.
00:22:14.250 --> 00:22:14.710 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:22:14.710 --> 00:22:15.460 Annie Guest: Yeah.
00:22:18.770 --> 00:22:22.460 Annie Guest: I wanted to reduce the clutter.
00:22:23.970 --> 00:22:29.259 Annie Guest: And wanted to.
00:22:31.870 --> 00:22:34.420 Annie Guest: Bring the eye.
00:22:34.830 --> 00:22:40.550 Annie Guest: draw the eye to the diagonal corner that you see if you can put up the after photo.
00:22:41.040 --> 00:22:49.419 Annie Guest: so that I could stand in the door and be drawn to the book shelves on the opposite wall.
00:22:50.010 --> 00:22:52.009 Frank R. Harrison: Do you see the pictures? Now? Correct.
00:22:52.010 --> 00:22:53.450 Annie Guest: No, I don't.
00:22:55.230 --> 00:22:58.420 Frank R. Harrison: Okay, but I but I know I know what the pictures look like.
00:22:58.840 --> 00:22:59.360 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:22:59.360 --> 00:23:07.900 Annie Guest: Okay, so I'm just describing them by heart. The! In order to do that, I painted the
00:23:08.030 --> 00:23:17.909 Annie Guest: bats of the bookshelves with a pale Aqua to make the contents of the bookshelves. The objects on the shelves pop.
00:23:18.890 --> 00:23:23.169 Annie Guest: The whole idea is to draw the eye from
00:23:24.100 --> 00:23:30.590 Annie Guest: from the entrance to the room to those bookshelves to make those an object of focus.
00:23:31.430 --> 00:23:37.200 Annie Guest: To put the the ficus plant is against the
00:23:37.380 --> 00:23:43.109 Annie Guest: south facing wall in order to filter natural light. Softly.
00:23:43.500 --> 00:24:01.349 Annie Guest: The sectional sofa is against the west facing window. In order to let me sit there and write the book in natural light. That Rothko reproduction you see, in the corner.
00:24:02.220 --> 00:24:02.980 Frank R. Harrison: Yeah.
00:24:02.980 --> 00:24:08.519 Annie Guest: That those vibrant colors are to draw the eye to the diagonal line.
00:24:08.820 --> 00:24:11.059 Annie Guest: just to back up for a second
00:24:11.380 --> 00:24:26.030 Annie Guest: one of the aspects of caregiving and and cleaning out a house for years and years is a feeling of being trapped. It's a very natural feeling, that's part of that feeling of being burnt out, isn't it?
00:24:26.230 --> 00:24:26.800 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:24:26.800 --> 00:24:27.280 Annie Guest: Isn't it.
00:24:27.280 --> 00:24:28.169 Frank R. Harrison: I can relate.
00:24:28.170 --> 00:24:35.760 Annie Guest: Okay. So anything that makes me walk into a room and feel like I can breathe
00:24:37.230 --> 00:24:39.580 Annie Guest: that I'm connected to nature.
00:24:39.780 --> 00:24:40.350 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:24:40.350 --> 00:24:46.220 Annie Guest: That I'm seeing natural light that makes me feel not trapped.
00:24:48.930 --> 00:24:51.589 Annie Guest: If we go to the living room.
00:24:52.920 --> 00:24:55.570 Frank R. Harrison: This is the before photo of the living room.
00:24:55.570 --> 00:24:56.630 Annie Guest: Or photo.
00:24:57.140 --> 00:25:06.879 Annie Guest: You see very high ceilings with columns, but rather sad looking furnishings.
00:25:07.280 --> 00:25:07.940 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:25:10.260 --> 00:25:15.600 Annie Guest: I wanted to take advantage of the expanse of that room. It's a big room.
00:25:17.150 --> 00:25:17.640 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:25:17.640 --> 00:25:24.429 Annie Guest: So I placed that round. If you, if you put up the after picture, I placed that round
00:25:24.650 --> 00:25:27.499 Annie Guest: mirror. That's a convex mirror.
00:25:28.210 --> 00:25:29.670 Frank R. Harrison: In the corner.
00:25:30.700 --> 00:25:34.570 Annie Guest: And a piece of furniture to draw the eye.
00:25:36.260 --> 00:25:36.950 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:25:36.950 --> 00:25:42.180 Annie Guest: And you're you're looking. You're standing in the doorway, and your eye is pulled
00:25:42.510 --> 00:25:45.819 Annie Guest: towards that corner. But you're picking up
00:25:46.310 --> 00:25:52.179 Annie Guest: all the objects, sweeping up all the objects on the way to that corner.
00:25:52.920 --> 00:25:53.660 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:25:55.780 --> 00:26:03.160 Annie Guest: The you see a round raspberry colored velvet picture on one of the sofas.
00:26:03.930 --> 00:26:04.640 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:26:04.640 --> 00:26:10.750 Annie Guest: That's the only round shape until you get to that round mirror.
00:26:11.610 --> 00:26:17.460 Annie Guest: So it's a little bit of a pop. It's a pop of color, and it's a pop of shape.
00:26:18.080 --> 00:26:18.750 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:26:19.830 --> 00:26:27.550 Annie Guest: There is another aspect to these, to these decisions in the
00:26:29.410 --> 00:26:45.749 Annie Guest: process of dividing up things among my siblings and me. We were choosing items we'd inherited from our parents, some of which had been in the family for a very long time. Some had come down through our grandparents.
00:26:46.280 --> 00:26:46.720 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:26:46.720 --> 00:26:50.940 Annie Guest: Some are pieces that we've known since we were children.
00:26:51.670 --> 00:26:52.080 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:26:52.080 --> 00:27:05.540 Annie Guest: But having them, those items in rooms made me feel that I was with
00:27:06.020 --> 00:27:09.909 Annie Guest: these people I love. Yeah, some of whom I never met.
00:27:10.310 --> 00:27:11.369 Annie Guest: They were just.
00:27:12.340 --> 00:27:19.020 Annie Guest: They might have died before I was born, but I felt connected to them.
00:27:19.870 --> 00:27:20.330 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:27:20.330 --> 00:27:24.990 Annie Guest: And but there! But it wasn't necessary
00:27:25.210 --> 00:27:29.719 Annie Guest: to feel to create a room that made me feel like I was living in a museum
00:27:31.240 --> 00:27:37.659 Annie Guest: or an antique store, because I can always pop things with modern art.
00:27:38.970 --> 00:27:42.880 Annie Guest: Or a contemporary rug or contemporary furniture.
00:27:43.850 --> 00:27:45.909 Annie Guest: But you see that in the den.
00:27:46.940 --> 00:27:53.309 Frank R. Harrison: Well, I have to tell you. I have just gotten word from our engineer that not one single photo was shown
00:27:53.450 --> 00:28:16.859 Frank R. Harrison: because of the way. Well, this is the 1st time I've actually tried that. I wish that we had time to test it out with Jesse beforehand. But you know what there is sometimes editing that can be done, but at the same time these are pictures that I could probably show during the commercial break. I just have to download them to my drive and show the befores and afters that way.
00:28:16.860 --> 00:28:20.110 Annie Guest: Okay, whatever you decide to do, right? But
00:28:20.110 --> 00:28:24.390 Annie Guest: I'm describing them in detail. So so
00:28:25.070 --> 00:28:28.229 Annie Guest: if if you edit them so that they can come in.
00:28:28.530 --> 00:28:29.140 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:28:29.140 --> 00:28:30.470 Annie Guest: As if as if
00:28:30.600 --> 00:28:41.739 Annie Guest: as if this didn't happen. I think you'll I think you'll be glad. But but it is a lot of people struggle, they say, with
00:28:41.850 --> 00:28:49.129 Annie Guest: the challenge of incorporating old furniture, or antiques, or vintage.
00:28:49.650 --> 00:28:50.230 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:28:50.230 --> 00:29:08.550 Annie Guest: In a in a modern setting, and wonder if it's even possible to do it so, because they don't think they can do it when their parents offer them this. These old pieces, they say. No, no, I want to get everything new. It's it is.
00:29:08.990 --> 00:29:17.870 Annie Guest: It is such a shame, because, excuse me, because you can make anything pop.
00:29:18.260 --> 00:29:18.800 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:29:18.800 --> 00:29:24.402 Annie Guest: With placement, with not overdoing it with a kind of
00:29:25.890 --> 00:29:30.849 Annie Guest: I mean one of the easiest ways to do. It is with artwork.
00:29:31.390 --> 00:29:32.090 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:29:32.650 --> 00:29:49.039 Annie Guest: Contemporary art over some. You know Federal sideboard. I mean, you could do it easily. That doesn't take expertise, but the idea is neither to feel like you're stuck in a in a time warp
00:29:49.150 --> 00:29:55.389 Annie Guest: in a in an antique store, nor in an Ikea showroom.
00:29:55.730 --> 00:29:57.429 Frank R. Harrison: Right, right.
00:29:58.390 --> 00:30:04.629 Annie Guest: Yeah, but the the but the benefit of bringing in Grandma Mimi's
00:30:05.301 --> 00:30:07.960 Annie Guest: table with the turned legs
00:30:08.290 --> 00:30:11.359 Annie Guest: is that you feel closer to her. She's
00:30:11.480 --> 00:30:15.249 Annie Guest: I mean you. You've you've you've brought her into a new century.
00:30:16.120 --> 00:30:17.090 Frank R. Harrison: Exactly.
00:30:17.290 --> 00:30:38.149 Frank R. Harrison: We're about to take our second break. But let me do this. I'm going to show the cover of your book on Amazon, and that it's available and stuff like that. And I'm going to send the pictures to the engineer. Jesse, do you think that during the 3rd segment, or even the 4th segment. You could flip the screen on your end and show them you could just put it in the chat box. Your answer.
00:30:38.150 --> 00:30:51.409 Frank R. Harrison: But if anything. What I can say is, I did see them, I guess, because they're on my computer. And I could say I could see the bright contrast that you created between the before and the after segments of both the den and the living room.
00:30:51.410 --> 00:31:00.450 Frank R. Harrison: I did not go into the atrium after I had noticed that nothing was visible to my, to my other viewers. But I can see that the book
00:31:01.524 --> 00:31:18.930 Frank R. Harrison: basically is going to highlight how your mind obviously shifted from all of the colors that you described, the positions of the pictures of the pillows, of of the of the room, the furniture looking more upgraded. I mean you need both physical
00:31:19.020 --> 00:31:32.169 Frank R. Harrison: aesthetic changes. Yes, when recovering from burnout, while at the same time, like, I've already been told that music helps as well. So I'm sure you were probably playing a lot of music while you were doing all these changes. Am I correct.
00:31:32.690 --> 00:31:33.210 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:31:33.210 --> 00:31:58.150 Frank R. Harrison: All right. So, ladies and gentlemen, if anything, you must get this book so that you can understand that life as a caregiver is a mental health challenge while you're going through the caregiving. And of course, as in Annie's experience, once they've transitioned, it becomes even more challenging from estate planning and dealing with the siblings and other things. So the whole exercise here is to understand how her passion
00:31:58.220 --> 00:32:15.819 Frank R. Harrison: brought her back into the recovery mode that she needed. So one of the things, if you're a caregiver out there, undergoing through burnout or challenges, try to find out what your inner passion is and use it while you're doing the caregiving, and beyond, all right, we'll be back in a few. Stay tuned.
00:33:46.620 --> 00:33:51.980 Frank R. Harrison: Okay, Annie. I think I succeeded during the commercial break to show the pictures. Did you see them?
00:33:53.510 --> 00:33:59.750 Frank R. Harrison: Oh, you have to unmute yourself again. I'm sorry. Meanwhile, Jesse, can you tell me if everything worked out based on your suggestions.
00:34:02.950 --> 00:34:05.350 Annie Guest: I was so proud of you, Frank. Thank you.
00:34:05.790 --> 00:34:14.980 Frank R. Harrison: Talk about challenges while live. You know we're all going through the moment momentum of you, illustrating your story in pictures.
00:34:15.500 --> 00:34:28.400 Frank R. Harrison: And while I was seeing it and the rest weren't, I figured? Okay, well, let's try to use the commercial break to really get a reflection on what's going on here. And from the look on your face I gather I did that.
00:34:31.929 --> 00:34:36.809 Annie Guest: I hope this made sense to your viewers
00:34:37.050 --> 00:34:41.619 Annie Guest: in, even though even though they're seeing the pictures blatantly.
00:34:42.540 --> 00:34:46.459 Annie Guest: I hope that I hope that the process makes sense.
00:34:47.110 --> 00:34:56.849 Frank R. Harrison: The way the way that I took it, and I hope, if if this matches the way the viewers took it is that the before, was as it was lived in by your parents.
00:34:56.850 --> 00:34:57.410 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:34:57.410 --> 00:34:58.729 Frank R. Harrison: The after.
00:34:58.880 --> 00:35:10.389 Frank R. Harrison: Is you reclaiming your agency, your resiliency? Yeah, by having it, the way you want to see it going forward being that you also inherited the house.
00:35:10.390 --> 00:35:10.800 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:35:10.800 --> 00:35:17.509 Frank R. Harrison: So you want also to show that as people transition, there is still vitality.
00:35:17.780 --> 00:35:21.289 Annie Guest: Yes, but I just but a couple of things.
00:35:21.610 --> 00:35:22.300 Frank R. Harrison: Sure.
00:35:22.659 --> 00:35:31.639 Annie Guest: One of the reasons I didn't break the bank as I was making these changes is that I had no ambition to tear down walls.
00:35:32.110 --> 00:35:32.860 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:35:33.677 --> 00:35:36.540 Annie Guest: That saves a lot of money.
00:35:37.490 --> 00:35:43.210 Annie Guest: I was able. I had no ambition to erase traces of my parents.
00:35:44.180 --> 00:35:44.690 Frank R. Harrison: Hmm.
00:35:44.690 --> 00:35:49.090 Annie Guest: So I just wanted to refresh the house.
00:35:49.290 --> 00:35:49.900 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:35:50.170 --> 00:35:52.839 Annie Guest: I wanted to shed my feeling of being
00:35:54.450 --> 00:36:03.120 Annie Guest: constricted. I wanted to breathe again. I wanted to feel like myself again, and I wanted to find my voice again, and
00:36:03.230 --> 00:36:09.160 Annie Guest: probably a stronger voice than I'd ever heard, because I was a new person.
00:36:10.630 --> 00:36:13.170 Frank R. Harrison: Yes, exactly.
00:36:13.580 --> 00:36:22.190 Frank R. Harrison: because I think you even told me when we 1st started talking about this episode, that there's a history of caregivers that actually sometimes even outlive
00:36:22.550 --> 00:36:28.889 Frank R. Harrison: their parents or their patients are taken care of, or rather not outlive. They move earlier.
00:36:28.890 --> 00:36:35.355 Annie Guest: Yep, they pre decease their cared ones cared for ones.
00:36:36.210 --> 00:36:40.139 Annie Guest: because they're not taking care of themselves. The stress is ongoing.
00:36:40.370 --> 00:36:40.760 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:36:43.710 --> 00:36:51.039 Annie Guest: And we will be talking about how to address these issues with siblings.
00:36:53.980 --> 00:36:59.860 Annie Guest: Because siblings can be resistant to hearing that.
00:37:00.675 --> 00:37:04.009 Annie Guest: That the caregiver needs some relief.
00:37:04.820 --> 00:37:05.460 Frank R. Harrison: Right
00:37:05.720 --> 00:37:25.659 Frank R. Harrison: right, and from my own experience, as my audience knows, I did, caregiving for 2 patients, my father recovering from cancer. He has some challenges recently, which is adding to my stress. But simultaneously it's nothing compared to what it was like to actually place my cousin in a nursing facility. This past February.
00:37:25.830 --> 00:37:29.500 Frank R. Harrison: I literally was on a 4 month hiatus, because I couldn't process anything
00:37:30.540 --> 00:37:34.890 Frank R. Harrison: other than the whole circumstances that were happening. But I can say that
00:37:35.200 --> 00:37:53.010 Frank R. Harrison: I did become resilient again. It was the support of the people of Talkradio, Dot, Nyc. As well as those friends of mine that have been loyal to me throughout all of my challenges, including one particular guy who Jose Dennis, who's now doing nutrition, caregiving for my father.
00:37:53.240 --> 00:38:00.069 Frank R. Harrison: But that's it. He has his boundaries, and I could tell you that when I was dealing with some challenges this past week.
00:38:00.280 --> 00:38:07.300 Frank R. Harrison: he would forcibly say, Frank, we're leaving the house. We got to get outside. You got to get out of here. I don't want you in here right now.
00:38:07.510 --> 00:38:08.120 Annie Guest: Yeah.
00:38:08.350 --> 00:38:15.969 Frank R. Harrison: You know. So, having having that kind of support is is also bringing me awareness of what I need to be preparing for
00:38:16.120 --> 00:38:19.999 Frank R. Harrison: what I need to be changing the kind of communication channels I need to
00:38:20.220 --> 00:38:27.119 Frank R. Harrison: activate and those that I need to just push away. And so that's the kind of 6 month timeline. I'm giving myself
00:38:27.260 --> 00:38:48.039 Frank R. Harrison: for my own transition. Now, my passion is my business, this podcast and a documentary that I'm waiting to release. And I'm going to push for that documentary to come out by next month, because that is going to be my pivot point while still dealing with what's happening to my father, but I'm I'm moving forward right now. I've already taken those steps to start moving.
00:38:48.040 --> 00:38:50.320 Annie Guest: Good for you, good for you.
00:38:50.650 --> 00:39:00.999 Annie Guest: Oh, thank you, I'm I found that one of the reasons that I was transformed in this process
00:39:01.500 --> 00:39:05.291 Annie Guest: of caregiving and then co-execturing
00:39:06.390 --> 00:39:10.320 Annie Guest: was that I had to face reality.
00:39:12.140 --> 00:39:24.570 Annie Guest: And denial and procrastinating, which had been 2 of my favorite solaces.
00:39:25.311 --> 00:39:36.309 Annie Guest: Really weren't working for me, even though I thought they were my friends. They really they're false friends.
00:39:36.690 --> 00:39:37.280 Frank R. Harrison: Yeah.
00:39:37.860 --> 00:39:39.839 Annie Guest: What I learned as I just.
00:39:40.400 --> 00:39:49.459 Annie Guest: and what I learned as as I got stronger was that I've been using denial
00:39:51.530 --> 00:39:57.770 Annie Guest: as a way of avoiding feeling emotions that may be uncomfortable or sad, right when
00:39:57.770 --> 00:40:04.750 Annie Guest: I faced the fact that Mom and Dad were coming to the end of their lives, and
00:40:05.360 --> 00:40:10.957 Annie Guest: my brilliant mom's mind was drifting, and my dad
00:40:11.930 --> 00:40:15.310 Annie Guest: needed help tying his shoes. My, you know
00:40:16.860 --> 00:40:21.229 Annie Guest: lion of a dad needed my help to tie his shoes.
00:40:23.180 --> 00:40:28.770 Annie Guest: I found that if I face that and accepted that loss.
00:40:28.930 --> 00:40:29.350 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:40:29.350 --> 00:40:43.090 Annie Guest: I could then find joy in the moment that there was still joy in the moment I didn't have to be afraid to face the loss, because there was still the opportunity
00:40:43.300 --> 00:41:08.160 Annie Guest: for us to find new rituals, new ways of having fun together. In in our case it was piling into the car carefully. They were long past piling into the car, but carefully maneuvering into the car, going down to our favorite sandwich. Place me going in and getting the order, and are sitting in the car and listening to and watching trains go by, and that was
00:41:08.160 --> 00:41:16.729 Annie Guest: our new ritual. Then eventually Dad had to use a feeding tube, because Parkinson's always comes back for more.
00:41:17.930 --> 00:41:26.160 Annie Guest: And Mom and I and Dad would lie in their huge bed, and Mom and I would eat pizza, and Dad would have this feeding tube.
00:41:27.150 --> 00:41:31.900 Annie Guest: I mean, you can always find a way to
00:41:32.340 --> 00:41:46.160 Annie Guest: to live, no matter what the reality is. What doesn't work is saying. Oh, he's fine, or this isn't happening, or I don't want to look at it, or it's too sad.
00:41:48.500 --> 00:41:51.149 Annie Guest: You find that you're strong enough to handle it.
00:41:51.510 --> 00:41:52.340 Frank R. Harrison: Right, right.
00:41:52.340 --> 00:41:57.139 Annie Guest: Okay. Now, how does this relate to creativity and resilience?
00:41:57.300 --> 00:41:57.890 Frank R. Harrison: Yeah.
00:41:58.110 --> 00:41:58.680 Frank R. Harrison: Ow.
00:41:58.680 --> 00:42:01.320 Annie Guest: Once you face the reality.
00:42:02.740 --> 00:42:05.929 Annie Guest: Once you accept that you're strong enough to handle it.
00:42:06.160 --> 00:42:08.990 Annie Guest: then you can start using your good mind
00:42:09.940 --> 00:42:12.960 Annie Guest: to figure out what you want to do about it.
00:42:13.450 --> 00:42:14.130 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:42:14.920 --> 00:42:20.770 Annie Guest: How to get creative. Accept what you can't change and figure out.
00:42:22.400 --> 00:42:26.300 Annie Guest: Figure out how to make something good come out of it. You can do that.
00:42:26.790 --> 00:42:28.540 Frank R. Harrison: Right exactly.
00:42:28.800 --> 00:42:35.000 Frank R. Harrison: You know the the it's kind of it's kind of interesting. That's the kind of mindset I put into place when I was simply dealing
00:42:35.020 --> 00:42:56.680 Frank R. Harrison: with my father's health, insurance or pool trust that the Medicaid system provides him, and I realized I have a company that I've created to house my catalog of shows that I've produced over the last 4 years, and to house the documentary. That will be released at some point soon. So I thought, why don't I house the actual caregiving work that I'm doing
00:42:56.680 --> 00:43:08.589 Frank R. Harrison: as part of it? It becomes an entrepreneurial venture as well as a caregiving venture, and I can see the return on my investment over time, even if it's not monetary.
00:43:09.620 --> 00:43:20.730 Frank R. Harrison: That's kind of the bandwidth I've had to put in this brain here, in order to process this as due diligence, or at the same time as the necessary work that has to be done for the future.
00:43:20.730 --> 00:43:29.250 Annie Guest: Well, you're you're you're making. You're making your effort. Serve multiple purposes, bring multiple returns to you.
00:43:29.250 --> 00:43:30.910 Frank R. Harrison: Correct, correct.
00:43:31.270 --> 00:43:34.269 Annie Guest: On that note we've got
00:43:35.770 --> 00:43:46.869 Annie Guest: for non negotiable needs. We have others. We have others. I don't want to say this is an exhaustive list. But we have non negotiable needs for
00:43:47.060 --> 00:43:54.819 Annie Guest: good nutrition, regular aerobic exercise, an enriched environment which includes social support.
00:43:55.100 --> 00:43:55.720 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:43:55.720 --> 00:44:00.109 Annie Guest: Isolation is an enemy, it is very dangerous.
00:44:00.110 --> 00:44:01.250 Frank R. Harrison: Very dangerous.
00:44:01.250 --> 00:44:02.760 Annie Guest: And ample sleep.
00:44:03.620 --> 00:44:04.040 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:44:04.040 --> 00:44:10.690 Annie Guest: When, when our time is short.
00:44:11.750 --> 00:44:16.290 Annie Guest: one creative activity is to figure out how you can stack
00:44:16.510 --> 00:44:20.979 Annie Guest: activities to meet more than one need. At the same time.
00:44:22.080 --> 00:44:26.420 Annie Guest: That's simple creativity. But that's using your head to think.
00:44:26.690 --> 00:44:34.890 Annie Guest: okay, I'm going to get exercise. I'll take a walk. But there's this book I want to read
00:44:35.520 --> 00:44:40.219 Annie Guest: and it's available. An audio book is available on spotify.
00:44:41.200 --> 00:44:49.910 Annie Guest: So I'll put my phone in my pocket. Listen to the book as I'm taking the walk. That's your intellectual stimulation, your enriched environment, and your
00:44:50.020 --> 00:44:51.640 Annie Guest: aerobic exercise.
00:44:52.000 --> 00:44:53.140 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:44:53.140 --> 00:45:01.590 Annie Guest: You can do that all day long. Now, social support is critically important.
00:45:01.940 --> 00:45:06.920 Annie Guest: Isolation is very dangerous.
00:45:07.230 --> 00:45:07.820 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:45:08.430 --> 00:45:16.400 Annie Guest: There's, in my opinion, in my opinion, there's just so far, so long you can nourish
00:45:16.530 --> 00:45:22.189 Annie Guest: a close friendship if you're relying only on text messages
00:45:24.280 --> 00:45:29.499 Annie Guest: certain point, this, the important things that are going on in both of your lives.
00:45:29.640 --> 00:45:30.140 Frank R. Harrison: Take over.
00:45:30.140 --> 00:45:33.879 Annie Guest: Will not be captured by text messages, and you're going.
00:45:34.080 --> 00:45:37.629 Annie Guest: You're going to feel isolated, I suggest.
00:45:38.780 --> 00:45:42.090 Annie Guest: because you're not really sharing yourself.
00:45:42.260 --> 00:45:43.689 Annie Guest: You just can't.
00:45:43.960 --> 00:45:51.019 Annie Guest: They won't know what's going on. Your friend won't know what is going on with you, and you won't know what is going on with your friend. Truly.
00:45:51.320 --> 00:45:52.160 Frank R. Harrison: That's true.
00:45:52.320 --> 00:46:01.150 Annie Guest: So it figuring out how to have real in person
00:46:02.840 --> 00:46:07.850 Annie Guest: time with your friend, or if it's a friend on the other side of the country.
00:46:08.360 --> 00:46:10.079 Annie Guest: We're in another country.
00:46:10.850 --> 00:46:20.099 Annie Guest: Actual phone calls or facetime is important, and text messages are good for setting up those
00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:35.160 Annie Guest: those meetings. And if you can actually set up, say, a regular play date with a friend. So once a month we're gonna go to Trader Joe's shop and then go to lunch.
00:46:35.752 --> 00:46:52.330 Annie Guest: I mean something something like that. Then you don't have to rethink it. Every time you find that you're something is happening to you because you are isolated. You're not gonna have to figure it out over and over. You've got this regular thing that you're doing.
00:46:52.970 --> 00:47:08.050 Frank R. Harrison: Correct. Well, now, we have to plan for the future. In our final segment we're about to take our final break. But I like, I appreciate those 4 points. I I think I've mastered 3 of them so far, or at least I've been mastering them. They're still in a work in progress.
00:47:08.230 --> 00:47:10.660 Annie Guest: But for all of us, for all of us.
00:47:10.660 --> 00:47:29.696 Frank R. Harrison: Correct, but I am. I'm very glad that you were able to literally come on this show at the very time when I was going through the challenges that I had described prior to our actual meeting today. So everything is happening for a good reason, and for that reason alone. Everybody. Please stay tuned.
00:49:14.640 --> 00:49:34.429 Frank R. Harrison: Hey, everybody, and welcome back to our final segment. This show has been therapeutic, as we both know at the same time. It has been a little bit technically challenging, although I see the people out there have had a chance to see the befores and afters of the various rooms that Annie had the chance to redesign after her
00:49:34.430 --> 00:50:00.130 Frank R. Harrison: parents both transitioned. You did see also the website. I just shown how you can get the book at a discount. Remember, why don't you, Annie, promote your website? Because I did show the Amazon page, but it probably doesn't offer that special discount as they go 1st on mute and then and tell not only about your website, but how else they can hear about you read about the book, probably even other podcasts. You've been on.
00:50:00.230 --> 00:50:08.997 Frank R. Harrison: so feel free to just shout out your your recent credentials after you unmute.
00:50:09.810 --> 00:50:11.260 Frank R. Harrison: It's okay.
00:50:16.830 --> 00:50:22.789 Annie Guest: We'll get it. Yes, the book is available on Amazon.
00:50:23.380 --> 00:50:29.369 Annie Guest: on at Barnes, and noble online and bookshop.org
00:50:30.050 --> 00:50:35.329 Annie Guest: and and Frank, if you put up the the link to the bookshop.org.
00:50:36.190 --> 00:50:36.820 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:50:37.480 --> 00:50:43.310 Annie Guest: bookshop.org, slash shop, slash, and a guest, books.
00:50:45.060 --> 00:50:46.170 Frank R. Harrison: Okay.
00:50:53.300 --> 00:51:02.019 Annie Guest: Then I have a website where the limited edition printed on sumptuous
00:51:02.500 --> 00:51:17.019 Annie Guest: 80 pound coated stock is available exclusively. And that's the website that Frank is showing now, and that is Www. Annie Guest designed for your mind.com.
00:51:18.580 --> 00:51:28.020 Annie Guest: On the media page is a list of several of the interviews I've given on other outlets.
00:51:29.510 --> 00:51:33.219 Annie Guest: and that's at the bottom of that page. You'll see that.
00:51:36.640 --> 00:51:38.140 Frank R. Harrison: I see? Yeah.
00:51:38.356 --> 00:51:43.536 Annie Guest: You can just several, but not not an exhaustive list.
00:51:49.100 --> 00:51:49.770 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:51:50.510 --> 00:52:00.269 Annie Guest: I'm continuing with other work in the house, and so on the blog that you'll see. You'll see that you can click on the blog.
00:52:00.760 --> 00:52:07.289 Annie Guest: You'll see other rooms that I didn't even touch when I wrote the book.
00:52:07.910 --> 00:52:20.139 Annie Guest: The in fact, that room that you see right there is one where I was storing boxes. And only tackled just a few months ago. So you see.
00:52:20.140 --> 00:52:20.520 Frank R. Harrison: Wow!
00:52:20.520 --> 00:52:22.459 Annie Guest: Before and after pictures for those.
00:52:24.830 --> 00:52:30.389 Frank R. Harrison: Interesting. Basically you're still, you're still in the middle of reclaiming your.
00:52:30.390 --> 00:52:33.660 Annie Guest: Yes, I don't. I don't want to seem middle, but.
00:52:34.120 --> 00:52:37.800 Frank R. Harrison: Or you're towards the you're towards the completion.
00:52:37.840 --> 00:52:41.520 Annie Guest: Towards the completion. It never does end.
00:52:41.520 --> 00:52:42.070 Frank R. Harrison: That's true.
00:52:42.070 --> 00:52:42.600 Annie Guest: It doesn't.
00:52:45.120 --> 00:52:48.039 Frank R. Harrison: But you're you're doing all the caregiving for yourself now.
00:52:48.040 --> 00:52:49.670 Annie Guest: Exactly.
00:52:51.810 --> 00:52:58.250 Frank R. Harrison: Okay, anything else you want to show from the site that people can turn to.
00:52:58.600 --> 00:53:05.909 Annie Guest: Well, one thing that I'm going to tackle is apropos of what you and I have been talking about today, Frank.
00:53:06.110 --> 00:53:09.619 Annie Guest: how to talk to your siblings and tell them
00:53:09.770 --> 00:53:17.729 Annie Guest: what you need, because the focus tends to be on the acute emergencies affecting your parents.
00:53:18.370 --> 00:53:21.500 Frank R. Harrison: And your siblings may not even see you.
00:53:22.950 --> 00:53:23.429 Frank R. Harrison: That's correct.
00:53:23.430 --> 00:53:24.830 Annie Guest: How do you address that?
00:53:25.200 --> 00:53:28.550 Annie Guest: So I'd like to. I'd like to discuss that on the website.
00:53:30.070 --> 00:53:32.459 Frank R. Harrison: Oh, okay, but
00:53:32.730 --> 00:53:36.600 Frank R. Harrison: actually, is that what you wanted to talk before we close out in the next couple.
00:53:36.600 --> 00:53:43.040 Annie Guest: If we have a couple of minutes in a nutshell, tell your siblings what you need.
00:53:43.410 --> 00:53:46.510 Annie Guest: Tell them what you need. Don't
00:53:46.810 --> 00:53:52.579 Annie Guest: rely on them to read your mind, particularly if you've been telling them that everything is fine.
00:53:54.460 --> 00:53:57.729 Frank R. Harrison: Or there's been no interest to find out what's going on.
00:53:57.730 --> 00:54:03.129 Annie Guest: Exactly it. I mean, that's that's the other. That's the other interpretation.
00:54:03.130 --> 00:54:03.520 Frank R. Harrison: Correct.
00:54:04.014 --> 00:54:16.370 Annie Guest: The and if your siblings don't think that it's necessary to bring in an outside professional caregiver because you're doing such a fine job.
00:54:18.120 --> 00:54:22.860 Annie Guest: Sit them down in a conference call or in person.
00:54:23.310 --> 00:54:27.349 Annie Guest: and explain the impact this is having on you and your life.
00:54:27.610 --> 00:54:28.030 Frank R. Harrison: Right.
00:54:28.030 --> 00:54:32.900 Annie Guest: Don't let them avoid it. Don't let them be in denial about that.
00:54:33.620 --> 00:54:34.400 Frank R. Harrison: Correct.
00:54:34.840 --> 00:54:42.710 Annie Guest: If necessary. I think this is an emergency. This is like pulling the pulling, the the fire alarm
00:54:42.870 --> 00:54:44.709 Annie Guest: plan. A vacation.
00:54:45.070 --> 00:54:45.990 Frank R. Harrison: -
00:54:46.230 --> 00:54:47.970 Annie Guest: And force the issue.
00:54:48.590 --> 00:54:49.110 Frank R. Harrison: Yes.
00:54:49.110 --> 00:55:09.480 Annie Guest: And say, I'm going away in a month. So let's sit down and and figure out how we're going to address the caregiving. I got some good recommendations from some of our friends in the neighborhood of caregivers who we might want to talk to. But I'm going to be gone from X date to X date.
00:55:10.365 --> 00:55:25.260 Annie Guest: But you need, if necessary, you need to take the issue of the caregiving out of the chronic category and make it acute, because that's the only thing that'll grab their attention.
00:55:25.710 --> 00:55:27.050 Frank R. Harrison: Correct, correct.
00:55:27.050 --> 00:55:31.109 Annie Guest: And that's that's just pulling the that's pulling the fire alarm. You don't!
00:55:31.230 --> 00:55:34.310 Annie Guest: You don't have to. You don't have to open with that.
00:55:34.890 --> 00:55:40.299 Frank R. Harrison: Correct, correct. So there's definitely all that in the planning stages right now.
00:55:40.300 --> 00:55:41.050 Annie Guest: Yes.
00:55:41.050 --> 00:55:46.060 Frank R. Harrison: And I figure August is going to be the month of execution for all of that.
00:55:46.330 --> 00:55:47.290 Annie Guest: Good for you.
00:55:47.290 --> 00:55:48.859 Frank R. Harrison: That's the way I'm planning it. Of course
00:55:49.490 --> 00:55:53.729 Frank R. Harrison: life life goes on while you're making other plans. A quote from John Lennon, but.
00:55:53.730 --> 00:55:57.270 Annie Guest: Good for you. Good. Yeah.
00:55:57.890 --> 00:56:14.949 Frank R. Harrison: And and doing this show also keeps me focused. I have been tailoring the guests to what's actually going on in my life at the moment. That's why I know you're familiar with Marshall Runji, because you both have mutual friends which has brought you to Frank about health.
00:56:15.550 --> 00:56:24.370 Frank R. Harrison: But the thing is is that when I devoted an entire 4 episode series to his book, The great Healthcare Disruption.
00:56:24.530 --> 00:56:52.659 Frank R. Harrison: little did I realize that it was I was about to face my own personal disruption, and I needed to use kind of the skill sets that he talks about in the book to keep myself focused. And then I had my break between seasons, and then, lo and behold! I had one person last week who talked about be venom therapy, which is good for the immune system. And here you are talking about ways to prepare for the inevitable through caregiving. Next week I have an individual
00:56:52.730 --> 00:56:58.149 Frank R. Harrison: who's showing what it's like to take the bull by the horns after dealing with alcoholism.
00:56:58.690 --> 00:56:59.280 Frank R. Harrison: So.
00:56:59.280 --> 00:56:59.650 Annie Guest: Really.
00:56:59.650 --> 00:57:05.850 Frank R. Harrison: You know what again? These are people who have had hard knocks per se, but owned it.
00:57:05.980 --> 00:57:09.700 Frank R. Harrison: And that's why I started the episode by saying.
00:57:09.860 --> 00:57:23.549 Frank R. Harrison: when you're given disruption, what are you going to do about it? That's my whole schedule for the next? Well, you're my second of 12 guests for this season. So the next 10 shows are all going to be commemorating people who took action.
00:57:24.330 --> 00:57:26.430 Annie Guest: And begins with acceptance.
00:57:27.010 --> 00:57:31.580 Annie Guest: taking a measure of reality, accepting it. And then what are you going to do about it?
00:57:31.580 --> 00:57:32.960 Frank R. Harrison: Exactly. Yeah, exactly.
00:57:34.160 --> 00:57:47.319 Frank R. Harrison: Well, it was a pleasure having you on Frank about health. Today. We're 2 min to ending. I just want to say to everyone out there, including Jesse. Thanks for helping me out with the technical difficulties and for engineering the show. Of course.
00:57:47.430 --> 00:58:12.129 Frank R. Harrison: Annie, thanks again for the talks we've had before, and of course, now you will see that we have another show coming on in about 3 min, called Success with a splash. So we're going to immediately log out, but I will call you back and thank you for being here today. I told last week's guest that they will be back as well for a follow up, and I think you will as well. That's my hunch.
00:58:12.130 --> 00:58:15.109 Annie Guest: You so much, Frank. It was a pleasure. Thank you.
00:58:15.390 --> 00:58:24.009 Frank R. Harrison: Same here, and I want everyone to remember the book is available on amazon.com. But if you go into her website, say it again.
00:58:24.520 --> 00:58:25.629 Frank R. Harrison: You're the name.
00:58:25.630 --> 00:58:29.559 Annie Guest: Ww. Annie Guest, designedforyourmind.com.
00:58:29.830 --> 00:58:33.979 Frank R. Harrison: There is a 20% discount on there using the code friendship. 20.
00:58:34.140 --> 00:58:37.340 Annie Guest: No, no! Free shipping within the Us.
00:58:37.500 --> 00:58:43.430 Frank R. Harrison: Woo. I'm sorry, free for well, if you look at the bill when you take away the shipping, it might as well be a 20%.
00:58:48.090 --> 00:58:49.360 Frank R. Harrison: Oh, God.
00:58:49.360 --> 00:58:50.780 Annie Guest: Free shipping.
00:58:50.780 --> 00:58:53.540 Frank R. Harrison: Free shipping, free shipping. Okay.
00:58:54.360 --> 00:59:22.350 Frank R. Harrison: you're so welcome. And yes, I can tell you that Annie is also available on Youtube. She has been on local television networks in her area, promoting her book. The book is a hot seller right now, according to Amazon, and I highly recommend it, especially if you're a caregiver yourself that's dealing with transition issues or burnout. It might be some guide that you can work from when you have to really hone in on your passion, and figure out how you're going to get your agency back.
00:59:22.380 --> 00:59:37.129 Frank R. Harrison: All right, ladies and gentlemen, I will be back next week with a new episode of Frank about health. But in the meantime remember to share this with everyone on Youtube, Facebook, Linkedin, or Twitch, and I will see you next week. Thank you again, Annie, and I'll speak to you shortly.
00:59:37.130 --> 00:59:38.519 Annie Guest: Thank you. Frank.
00:59:38.530 --> 00:59:39.770 Frank R. Harrison: Alright, bye-bye.
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