Thursdays 12:00pm - 1:00pm (EDT)
EPISODE SUMMARY:
This week, on The Conscious Consultant Hour, it’s just you and Sam as he discusses all about family.
The importance of family goes far beyond how we are brought up or how many siblings we have. Our family shapes our very personality. But what shaped our family?
Our identity is so wrapped up in our parental figures, our early childhood experiences and even our ancestors. Understanding where they came from and what they had to deal with helps to give us perspective that can support us in our inner work.
Tune in and share your own experiences with your family and how that has shaped your life. Who do you call family? Is it your blood relatives or the friends you choose as your tribe?
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Tune in for this enlightening conversation at TalkRadio.nyc
Sam reads a section from his book Everyday Awakening entitled Just Because We Feel Angry Doesn’t Mean We Have To Respond With Anger. Sam shares what inspired him to write this piece. He expresses that over the years, he’s learned that it only gets worse when you respond with anger. It’s not about not sticking up for yourself but how we choose to respond to confrontation. Sam suggests that if someone is confronting you with anger, then you will want to find a way to ease the tension. He explains that not responding with anger is not about holding on to our anger but redirecting it. It’s about taking the high road and responding with compassion.
Sam introduces the topic for today’s episode. Sam was influenced to discuss family in this episode because of the upcoming holiday season. He discusses the importance of family and how it can shape us as individuals. We are influenced by our parents, who their parents influenced, and so on. Sam says he admires indigenous culture because they talk about the importance of their ancestors. Everyone’s family is going to look different from others. Some people might come from a single-parent household, and others might be raised by their grandparents. No matter who raised you, they will shape your identity.
Sam continues to talk about the influence our parents have on us. Sam praises therapy as a means to gain a different perspective. It is a process of recognizing our behavior, accepting that this is how it’s been until now, and then we choose how we can be different. Sam says it is about recognizing that feeling like a child in a traumatic situation and telling yourself that it isn’t you anymore; you are not powerless. To truly be ourselves, we must be conscious and aware of our choices.
Sam discusses his process of accepting his relationship with his parents. He says we have the power to make a choice. It’s not about making the right choice but about making a conscious one. We may have heartbreak from our family, but how we choose to deal with the heartbreak counts. We should not allow heartbreak to rule us for the rest of our lives. Sam encourages his listeners to start by asking themselves who are we and how do we want to live our lives?
00:00:25.690 --> 00:00:40.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Good afternoon. Good morning! Good evening. Wherever you're tuning in from welcome to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. I am very, very pleased that you are all here with me today.
00:00:40.650 --> 00:00:50.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Um! It's one of those shows. It's just you and me. So I hope you'll enjoy today's show um,
00:00:52.220 --> 00:01:11.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we we have a wonderful show talking about sort of an important topic, I think, about family and the role that family plays uh in our development in in our life. Um! But of course, first we'll have a little section from my book, Everyday Awakening Um,
00:01:11.460 --> 00:01:15.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and this uh week the section is entitled
00:01:16.280 --> 00:01:24.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just because we feel angry does not mean we have to respond with anger.
00:01:24.770 --> 00:01:28.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There is a misconception about people who are kind
00:01:28.950 --> 00:01:36.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: about people who normally don't get upset at others, about people who treat others with kindness and compassion.
00:01:37.020 --> 00:01:40.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Even kind people get angry,
00:01:40.780 --> 00:01:50.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Even kind people get upset. Sometimes even kind people feel like pounding the wall on occasion.
00:01:50.770 --> 00:01:54.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The difference between kind people and those who are not as kind
00:01:55.100 --> 00:01:59.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is that anger is not their default state of being
00:01:59.580 --> 00:02:02.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not their preferred way of interacting.
00:02:02.830 --> 00:02:08.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They see the disadvantages of acting out of anger or rage,
00:02:08.860 --> 00:02:11.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and they choose to avoid them.
00:02:11.680 --> 00:02:17.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This does not mean they don't feel anger or get riled up.
00:02:17.700 --> 00:02:21.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This does not mean they don't feel like fighting
00:02:21.840 --> 00:02:32.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just that they look for a different way of expressing themselves a more productive way a way that can avoid the escalation of emotions.
00:02:33.420 --> 00:02:41.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: When anger is met with anger, it rarely. It rarely leads to a productive outcome.
00:02:41.640 --> 00:02:45.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It rarely serves either person involved,
00:02:45.660 --> 00:02:51.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it often creates situations that can easily spiral out of control,
00:02:51.840 --> 00:03:01.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: which leads us to make decisions and say things we regret later. It causes us to act in ways that once we calm down,
00:03:01.640 --> 00:03:04.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we don't even understand ourselves.
00:03:05.340 --> 00:03:08.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Of course we all get angry. Sometimes.
00:03:09.280 --> 00:03:13.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Of course, we all experience anger in our own way.
00:03:13.980 --> 00:03:21.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yet it is a conscious choice how we decide to respond to it or interact with people
00:03:22.110 --> 00:03:23.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we're angry,
00:03:24.580 --> 00:03:28.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how we move forward with. It is a decision
00:03:29.430 --> 00:03:35.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not responding out of anger is the surest way to de-escalate matters.
00:03:36.150 --> 00:03:39.199 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It is like putting water on fire.
00:03:40.470 --> 00:03:47.999 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Things stop burning out of control, and we can begin to talk more calmly and more rationally.
00:03:49.250 --> 00:03:52.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Another person may still be angry,
00:03:52.640 --> 00:03:54.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we may be, too,
00:03:55.240 --> 00:03:59.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but this does not mean we have to be unkind or vicious.
00:04:00.360 --> 00:04:03.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can be compassionate both to ourselves
00:04:04.080 --> 00:04:08.309 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and to the other person. No matter how we feel inside.
00:04:08.910 --> 00:04:13.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We still have to deal with those feelings and release the energy
00:04:13.520 --> 00:04:18.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we just don't have to release it in front of the other person,
00:04:18.760 --> 00:04:27.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: managing our anger our angry feelings responsibly is what kind people do.
00:04:28.640 --> 00:04:31.999 Is there some anger you need to express?
00:04:32.300 --> 00:04:37.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: How can you release it without reacting in front of the other person.
00:04:38.420 --> 00:04:41.159 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So this section of my book
00:04:41.180 --> 00:04:45.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I wrote a while ago, and I wrote it in response
00:04:45.290 --> 00:04:47.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to somebody
00:04:47.610 --> 00:04:53.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who was giving me a hard time, because
00:04:54.120 --> 00:05:03.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: they didn't like that. I didn't get angry or upset, or in their perception. I wasn't getting angry or upset,
00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:06.190 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:05:06.590 --> 00:05:11.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I can't really say well, I kind of sort of know where it comes from,
00:05:11.930 --> 00:05:16.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but I can't say like there's any one in incident in my life
00:05:17.370 --> 00:05:20.150 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where it was like. After that.
00:05:20.220 --> 00:05:28.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's it. I'm not going to express anger anymore. No, I get angry. I get upset. I lose my temper. I'm a human being absolutely.
00:05:32.590 --> 00:05:36.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But what I've learned over the years. And what I've observed is
00:05:39.230 --> 00:05:42.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that when we interact with someone who is angry
00:05:45.260 --> 00:05:50.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we respond with anger on our side,
00:05:52.070 --> 00:05:53.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it doesn't get any better,
00:05:54.830 --> 00:05:57.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it only gets worse.
00:05:57.950 --> 00:06:00.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Our emotions flare up,
00:06:00.870 --> 00:06:04.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our logical part of our brain shuts down.
00:06:05.310 --> 00:06:08.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We act like it's a life and death situation,
00:06:09.490 --> 00:06:14.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we say things, or we do things that later on we will regret.
00:06:20.030 --> 00:06:22.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And why is that? Why does that happen?
00:06:25.180 --> 00:06:33.289 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well, it's kind of like when somebody is angry they're on fire, right. We even have that expression. You know that person is really on fire
00:06:35.320 --> 00:06:40.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when you bring another person in, and they're also angry. They're on fire as well.
00:06:41.870 --> 00:06:45.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So what happens when you combine fire with fire?
00:06:45.890 --> 00:06:48.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You get a bigger fire.
00:06:48.910 --> 00:06:51.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oftentimes it explodes,
00:06:53.770 --> 00:06:58.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it can hurt everyone, even by Sanders,
00:07:03.030 --> 00:07:04.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so
00:07:05.280 --> 00:07:07.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I have a tendency.
00:07:07.250 --> 00:07:08.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I admit it.
00:07:09.490 --> 00:07:11.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: When i'm faced with anger
00:07:12.600 --> 00:07:15.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I find other ways to respond.
00:07:16.560 --> 00:07:20.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes I try and just avoid it. I may walk away,
00:07:24.410 --> 00:07:27.689 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or I may stand there, face them,
00:07:27.930 --> 00:07:31.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and just be very calm in my response.
00:07:33.690 --> 00:07:38.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And what happens when you respond to an angry person calmly.
00:07:39.090 --> 00:07:41.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well, one of two things:
00:07:41.900 --> 00:07:46.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the fact that we're being calm could actually enrage the other person more.
00:07:49.140 --> 00:07:50.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Or
00:07:52.090 --> 00:07:55.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's kind of like someone trying to push against
00:07:55.140 --> 00:07:59.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a a a bed sheet that's hanging on a close line
00:07:59.030 --> 00:08:07.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You try and push against, and all it does is give way. And so pretty soon there's nothing to push against, and when there's nothing to push against.
00:08:08.530 --> 00:08:13.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Then the angry person they may get, they get frustrated.
00:08:13.710 --> 00:08:20.919 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But Then they realized there's no point in being angry at this person's not doing anything, and they may travel on their way.
00:08:24.910 --> 00:08:26.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now,
00:08:26.100 --> 00:08:27.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this does not mean
00:08:28.120 --> 00:08:31.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if we're being attacked, not to defend ourselves.
00:08:31.590 --> 00:08:33.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And it does not mean
00:08:33.929 --> 00:08:38.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that if somebody is doing something wrong, we don't, try and stop it.
00:08:38.750 --> 00:08:40.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's not what this is about.
00:08:43.309 --> 00:08:47.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This is about how we choose to respond to confrontation.
00:08:49.070 --> 00:08:51.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now, if you're like me,
00:08:51.870 --> 00:08:59.400 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you don't like confrontation society in general trains us not to be very confrontational.
00:09:00.080 --> 00:09:03.389 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We tend to be very non-confrontational,
00:09:06.460 --> 00:09:08.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that's okay.
00:09:12.510 --> 00:09:17.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If there's a difference between having to respond to anger
00:09:17.200 --> 00:09:18.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: versus
00:09:18.640 --> 00:09:21.119 having to deal with a confrontation,
00:09:23.760 --> 00:09:28.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because if the person confronting you is confronting you with anger,
00:09:29.960 --> 00:09:32.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you want to bring that temperature down.
00:09:33.170 --> 00:09:36.240 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You want to cool off that fire,
00:09:36.580 --> 00:09:39.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and you cool off the fire with water,
00:09:41.610 --> 00:09:44.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and what is water? Water is our heart?
00:09:44.910 --> 00:09:47.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What is the connection between us
00:09:50.280 --> 00:09:55.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we respond with more anger? We're not connecting with the other person.
00:09:59.890 --> 00:10:04.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And when we respond with anger, we're not thinking very clearly,
00:10:04.670 --> 00:10:07.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we're not thinking clearly.
00:10:07.100 --> 00:10:16.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We are much more likely to do something that we're going to regret very much after it is over.
00:10:21.310 --> 00:10:22.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I remember
00:10:23.670 --> 00:10:29.510 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I I can't remember exactly who said it, but I remember many, many, many years ago.
00:10:30.830 --> 00:10:35.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Here, hearing the expression, I believe it's a Buddhist expression that,
00:10:36.130 --> 00:10:38.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being angry at somebody else
00:10:39.210 --> 00:10:43.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is like drinking poison, and expecting the other person to die
00:10:45.380 --> 00:10:50.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we get angry. When we embody anger,
00:10:50.710 --> 00:10:54.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we're literally poisoning the cells in our body,
00:10:56.330 --> 00:11:00.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the energy that we are holding, and we are creating
00:11:02.470 --> 00:11:04.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it. It actually
00:11:05.180 --> 00:11:07.769 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is not healthy for us.
00:11:07.840 --> 00:11:10.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It actually works against us,
00:11:12.550 --> 00:11:16.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it causes us to have all kinds of problems. Now,
00:11:17.200 --> 00:11:19.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this is very important.
00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:27.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If we are holding the anger, then we're not releasing it. That anger is going to eat up inside,
00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:32.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not responding with anger, is not about holding on to our anger.
00:11:32.960 --> 00:11:44.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about redirecting it. It's about waiting for an appropriate moment to express it. It's about letting it go in a way that's not going to harm
00:11:44.670 --> 00:11:47.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: another person or ourselves.
00:11:48.980 --> 00:11:51.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about taking the high road.
00:11:52.700 --> 00:11:55.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about being in a situation
00:11:56.050 --> 00:11:58.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where you can see
00:11:58.590 --> 00:12:02.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how angry and upset the other person is,
00:12:02.620 --> 00:12:10.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and realizing, no matter how in just you might feel, it is no matter how wrong you may think they are,
00:12:12.900 --> 00:12:21.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's about consciously saying, I choose not to respond with anger. I choose to respond in a different way,
00:12:22.060 --> 00:12:25.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and there are many ways to respond to anger
00:12:25.340 --> 00:12:28.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: doesn't only have to be with kindness.
00:12:28.270 --> 00:12:32.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You can try responding with logic that often doesn't work.
00:12:32.890 --> 00:12:36.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You can try responding with an understanding
00:12:37.560 --> 00:12:41.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you can try responding by just reflecting back to the other person
00:12:41.830 --> 00:12:45.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what you're seeing in them, and how they're acting.
00:12:48.600 --> 00:12:53.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Gee! You seem really upset at this, I can tell this. Has you very angry?
00:12:56.680 --> 00:12:58.640 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Damn right. I'm angry.
00:13:01.080 --> 00:13:04.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What is it about this like? Has you so angry?
00:13:05.370 --> 00:13:09.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Allow them to talk? Allow them to let it all out.
00:13:10.700 --> 00:13:16.519 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If we hold space for the other person to allow them to express their anger,
00:13:17.010 --> 00:13:20.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but without taking that anger in
00:13:20.370 --> 00:13:24.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: allowing that anger to roll over us and past us.
00:13:25.290 --> 00:13:28.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Once they finished releasing it and letting it go.
00:13:31.570 --> 00:13:34.549 Then they won't. Be so angry anymore.
00:13:34.690 --> 00:13:38.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's when you can now have a conversation with them.
00:13:38.440 --> 00:13:40.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now you can talk to them
00:13:41.220 --> 00:13:42.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: now. Maybe
00:13:43.180 --> 00:13:46.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you can find a way to find some common ground
00:13:47.580 --> 00:13:50.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and resolve whatever the issue is that got
00:13:51.370 --> 00:13:53.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: them up so upset to begin with,
00:13:58.180 --> 00:13:59.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so
00:14:01.340 --> 00:14:05.219 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not responding with anger does not mean we're weak,
00:14:05.940 --> 00:14:07.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: does not mean
00:14:08.650 --> 00:14:10.259 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that we're timid.
00:14:10.500 --> 00:14:15.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Does not mean that we allow ourselves to be bullied.
00:14:15.890 --> 00:14:17.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Not at all.
00:14:18.700 --> 00:14:21.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's just a different choice.
00:14:22.150 --> 00:14:25.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's a way for us to choose
00:14:27.630 --> 00:14:30.919 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how to control the situation,
00:14:33.930 --> 00:14:37.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and if we let our anger control us, we,
00:14:38.520 --> 00:14:41.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we're not controlling the situation,
00:14:44.730 --> 00:14:46.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and ultimately
00:14:47.630 --> 00:14:50.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: one of the tools I use very frequently.
00:14:51.430 --> 00:14:53.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I feel myself getting angry.
00:14:54.600 --> 00:14:56.209 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I asked. It
00:14:56.450 --> 00:15:04.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is this gonna matter tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, ten years from now, twenty years from now,
00:15:04.130 --> 00:15:08.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: fifty years from now am I even going to remember This happened.
00:15:10.010 --> 00:15:12.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I try and give myself perspective
00:15:12.910 --> 00:15:20.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because oftentimes we get angry at the littlest things that are so insignificant,
00:15:21.150 --> 00:15:24.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and mostly they're just not worth our energy.
00:15:24.770 --> 00:15:30.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They're not worth draining our energy to get upset and angry over.
00:15:31.650 --> 00:15:34.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes they feel really important.
00:15:35.690 --> 00:15:36.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But
00:15:37.790 --> 00:15:39.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if you pull it back,
00:15:39.750 --> 00:15:47.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and you just say, hey, like, really care about this that much Ten years from now. Will it make that big a difference in my life?
00:15:49.470 --> 00:15:53.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe that can help to pull the anger back a little bit,
00:15:54.710 --> 00:16:00.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and oftentimes when we're being triggered when there is anger within us,
00:16:01.200 --> 00:16:04.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's probably about something completely different.
00:16:04.610 --> 00:16:06.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's for another time,
00:16:07.110 --> 00:16:15.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: anyway. So That's the section from my book. Just because we feel angry does not mean we have to respond with anger
00:16:15.320 --> 00:16:21.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that's from my book, Everyday Awakening, which, of course you can find it everyday awakening bookcom,
00:16:21.730 --> 00:16:39.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that will take you right to our listing on Amazon. But if you're like me and you like supporting those small independent bookstores. Please find an independent bookstore, and just they don't have it in stock. Just ask them to order everyday awakening. We're in major book distributors, so any bookstore can get it.
00:16:41.900 --> 00:16:53.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So um time for us to to to take a little break, and when we come back we're going to get into, uh the meat of our matter today what our show is all about, which is the heartbreak of family
00:16:55.060 --> 00:16:58.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: really about how important family is,
00:17:00.040 --> 00:17:03.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and how family often breaks our heart,
00:17:03.580 --> 00:17:05.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and what that does
00:17:05.640 --> 00:17:10.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: two is for us with us for the rest of our lives. So
00:17:10.390 --> 00:17:34.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. We do this every Thursday right here and talk radio that Nyc. At twelve Pm. Eastern time, Wednesday mornings ten Am. On Kmt out in Palm Springs, California. Hello, to all my Kmt fans. Thank you so much for tuning in every week. I truly appreciate you, and we will be right back
00:17:34.940 --> 00:17:36.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: in just a moment.
00:17:39.680 --> 00:18:05.660 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Are you a business owner? Do you want to be a business owner? Do you work with business owners? Hi, I'm. Steven Fry, your small and medium sized business or Smb Guide, and i'm the host of the new Show always Friday, while i'd love to have fun on my show. We take those Friday feelings of freedom and clarity to discuss popular topics on the minds of Smbs today. Please join me in my various special guests on Friday at eleven Am. On Talk radio, Dot Nyc.
00:18:07.870 --> 00:18:14.520 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Are you a conscious Co-creator? Are you on a quest to raise your vibration and your consciousness?
00:18:14.530 --> 00:18:38.440 www.TalkRadio.nyc: I'm. Sam Leblitch, your conscious consultant, and on my show the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity, we will touch upon all these topics and more. Listen. Live at our new time on Thursdays at twelve noon Eastern time. That's the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. Thursday's twelve noon on Talk Radio Nyc:
00:18:43.480 --> 00:19:12.380 Are you on edge Hey, we live in challenging edgy time. So let's lean in. I'm. Sander, Bargeman, the host of the edge of every day, which airs each Monday at seven P. M. Eastern time on talk, radio, Dot Nyc. Tune in Live with me and my friends and colleagues as we share stories and perspectives about pushing boundaries and exploring our rough edges. That's the edge of every day on Mondays at seven Pm. Eastern time on top radio, dot Nyc:
00:19:13.730 --> 00:19:24.979 www.TalkRadio.nyc: you're listening to talk radio Nyc, uplift, educate, and power
00:19:25.070 --> 00:19:26.170 you
00:19:27.430 --> 00:19:28.520 you,
00:19:30.110 --> 00:19:30.970 you,
00:19:31.030 --> 00:19:31.970 you
00:19:43.920 --> 00:19:44.960 you,
00:19:52.950 --> 00:19:58.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and welcome back to the conscious consult. Now awakening humanity.
00:19:58.750 --> 00:20:03.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Um. So let's dive into today's topic. The heartbreak of family.
00:20:03.490 --> 00:20:06.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So why am I talking about this this week? Well,
00:20:06.620 --> 00:20:20.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we're in that season, Aren't. We we're here in the United States. We're getting into the holiday season. Uh, Thanksgiving is just a couple of weeks away. Um! And people starting talking about family gatherings more and more,
00:20:20.470 --> 00:20:31.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I was also recently a couple of weeks ago, was at a a friend's birthday party, his forty fifth birthday party, and and his parents were there, and it was good to see them and stuff, and I was just kind of
00:20:31.780 --> 00:20:33.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: reflecting on
00:20:34.160 --> 00:20:38.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how important family is to us
00:20:39.170 --> 00:20:43.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and what I mean, important, I mean important in terms of
00:20:43.400 --> 00:20:45.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where we come from,
00:20:45.590 --> 00:20:47.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how family shapes us,
00:20:49.360 --> 00:20:50.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:20:51.700 --> 00:20:55.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how so much of our identity,
00:20:55.560 --> 00:21:00.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of how we show up in the world it's all shaped by
00:21:00.300 --> 00:21:02.519 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our family, our parents.
00:21:06.090 --> 00:21:10.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But then, when we look at our parents, we look at our mother and our father,
00:21:10.990 --> 00:21:13.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what shape their identity?
00:21:14.220 --> 00:21:15.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well,
00:21:15.650 --> 00:21:18.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it was their mother and father.
00:21:18.670 --> 00:21:20.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It was there
00:21:20.480 --> 00:21:30.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: experiences and their situations that they brought up. And so they're not an exact carbon copy of their parents. We are not an exact carbon copy of our parents.
00:21:31.690 --> 00:21:34.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But that's where our biggest influence comes from.
00:21:35.100 --> 00:21:46.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So actually it's not just our parents. It's our Parents' parents or grandparents. Their parents, their parents, their parents, et cetera, et cetera, all the way back.
00:21:48.370 --> 00:21:57.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And this is one of the reasons why I really honor indigenous wisdom, because indigenous cultures have always always
00:21:58.690 --> 00:22:01.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: talked about the importance of our ancestors,
00:22:03.220 --> 00:22:17.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and in the modern world we have a tendency to pull it and to say, forget it, and and not really give much credence to what our ancestors did hundreds of years ago, or even thousands of years ago.
00:22:18.970 --> 00:22:22.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But the truth is, it has all shaped us.
00:22:23.740 --> 00:22:27.889 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What our ancestors did thousands of years ago
00:22:28.380 --> 00:22:32.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was handed down, modified, but handed down,
00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:40.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and hand it down again, and hand it down again and hand it down again, again and again and again, until it came to us.
00:22:43.670 --> 00:22:47.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So we're little kids. We're just babies.
00:22:48.200 --> 00:22:51.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Our whole world is about our parents.
00:22:51.700 --> 00:22:55.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Everything we learn, and we model comes from our parents,
00:22:58.340 --> 00:23:11.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: from the the mother figure in our childhood. And again, being aware that sometimes the mother figure isn't a woman, and sometimes the father figure is in the man, or sometimes the mother figures, and the mother and the father figure, isn't the father
00:23:11.910 --> 00:23:18.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with with blended families and all kinds of things these days. It's a little bit more complicated than that,
00:23:20.110 --> 00:23:26.889 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but one of the things, and I've talked about this in in in an older episode from a few years ago.
00:23:28.680 --> 00:23:31.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The mother or type and the father are type
00:23:31.880 --> 00:23:38.039 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: kind of represents sort of two different sides of our being, of our Psyche, of ourselves,
00:23:38.180 --> 00:23:50.759 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and the person who embodied sort of the mother archetype in our and and we get sometimes it's the same person, too, who who who embodies that our type is about
00:23:51.520 --> 00:23:53.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: relationships,
00:23:54.230 --> 00:23:58.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: friendships, intimate relationships, communication
00:23:58.720 --> 00:24:00.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: nurturing
00:24:01.110 --> 00:24:07.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: those sort of aspects in our life, in our in our personality and in our life.
00:24:08.570 --> 00:24:10.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And the Father Arch type
00:24:12.580 --> 00:24:19.499 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is normally about work, finances, money, our relationship to abundance,
00:24:19.810 --> 00:24:25.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our our relationship to achievement, things like that.
00:24:27.160 --> 00:24:30.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so when we look up, how we show up
00:24:32.200 --> 00:24:33.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with friends,
00:24:34.280 --> 00:24:38.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with our partner, with our lovers, with our spouses,
00:24:40.310 --> 00:24:42.310 and with our siblings,
00:24:43.160 --> 00:24:46.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a lot of that. Not all of it. But a lot of that
00:24:47.060 --> 00:24:48.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: comes from
00:24:49.160 --> 00:24:55.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our relationship to that mother. Figure that Mother archetype.
00:24:57.600 --> 00:25:01.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So if we have a good relationship with it. If we have a loving relationship,
00:25:01.740 --> 00:25:04.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we have pretty loving relationships in our life,
00:25:05.270 --> 00:25:07.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we're pretty good with it.
00:25:08.590 --> 00:25:10.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But if there's some
00:25:10.840 --> 00:25:18.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: tension, if there's some angst, if there's something in there that's
00:25:19.820 --> 00:25:21.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: out of whack
00:25:22.280 --> 00:25:25.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that's that's not really clean,
00:25:26.090 --> 00:25:28.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: then that's going to show up in our relationships
00:25:29.780 --> 00:25:32.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when things. Aren't going to be so clean
00:25:32.620 --> 00:25:33.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for us
00:25:34.260 --> 00:25:36.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with our spouse, our lover,
00:25:37.390 --> 00:25:41.439 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our friendships are intimate relationships, our siblings,
00:25:43.720 --> 00:25:48.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because we embody that energy
00:25:49.550 --> 00:25:52.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that has been handed down to us
00:25:52.870 --> 00:25:57.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: from our mother and their mother and their matriarchal line,
00:25:59.780 --> 00:26:02.190 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and what they've experienced
00:26:03.440 --> 00:26:05.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: affects and informs
00:26:06.390 --> 00:26:11.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how they brought us up, how they modeled how to be in the world for us.
00:26:13.810 --> 00:26:18.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so that's the model we follow, because we just don't have any other model.
00:26:20.570 --> 00:26:37.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now, in some cultures, the uh, especially in in poor families. The the parents may give the kids over to the grandparents while the parents are just working all the time to make money, so sometimes it's the grandparents who act like the mother and father in those early formative years.
00:26:39.860 --> 00:26:46.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes, if it's a single parent family, whether it's a man or a woman they have to take on both roles
00:26:46.380 --> 00:26:52.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes there's an aunt or an uncle who will also take on one of those roles.
00:26:56.960 --> 00:26:59.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so how we learn
00:26:59.500 --> 00:27:03.199 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to deal with these different different aspects
00:27:06.090 --> 00:27:08.309 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that comes from our family.
00:27:10.440 --> 00:27:12.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And this is why,
00:27:12.820 --> 00:27:15.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when you look at an individual,
00:27:16.360 --> 00:27:25.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and you look at the environment they were brought up in their family environment, and what kind of relationships they had in their family
00:27:26.090 --> 00:27:28.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it always affects.
00:27:28.310 --> 00:27:30.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There are other relationships.
00:27:32.940 --> 00:27:34.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so
00:27:34.370 --> 00:27:36.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I I say all this
00:27:36.650 --> 00:27:41.499 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not to criticize our parents or grandparents, or our ancestors,
00:27:42.280 --> 00:27:45.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but to be more aware of it,
00:27:45.880 --> 00:27:51.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to allow it to inform our experience in a way that we can be more conscious of it.
00:27:52.890 --> 00:27:55.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So it doesn't have to control us
00:27:56.860 --> 00:28:05.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that we can still be more of our own person and make our own choices. But if we're not aware of it, if we're not shining a light
00:28:06.040 --> 00:28:09.259 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: on those aspects of ourself.
00:28:11.170 --> 00:28:13.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Then we're acting unconsciously.
00:28:14.770 --> 00:28:18.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Then those things are controlling us. We are not controlling them,
00:28:23.300 --> 00:28:25.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and sometimes we just don't want to admit it.
00:28:26.450 --> 00:28:34.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we're shamed of the way our parents act. Because we think they're so, Corny? They're so. This they're so that they're embarrassing.
00:28:35.790 --> 00:28:39.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oh, why do my parents have to be like that.
00:28:41.690 --> 00:28:44.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If we're embarrassed
00:28:44.640 --> 00:28:50.159 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for one or both of our parents, then we're embarrassed for ourselves,
00:28:50.340 --> 00:28:53.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because they both live inside of us,
00:28:57.590 --> 00:29:04.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and regardless of how closer, not close your relationship. It is or was with them
00:29:06.300 --> 00:29:09.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that energy still lives on.
00:29:13.810 --> 00:29:14.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:29:16.560 --> 00:29:18.249 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what do we do with it?
00:29:18.610 --> 00:29:24.989 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So now we're a little bit aware. Now we may catch ourselves Now we're a little bit of where. What do we do with it?
00:29:25.060 --> 00:29:26.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well,
00:29:26.110 --> 00:29:46.549 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: i'll tell you what to do with it when we come back in just a moment. So please stay tuned. We'll be back in just a moment. You're listening to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. This is one of those shows no guest. You got just me for the whole hour. I hope you're enjoying it. I hope you're getting something out of it. We're gonna. I'm gonna
00:29:46.560 --> 00:29:50.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: good dive in a little bit deeper right after this.
00:29:51.780 --> 00:30:18.869 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Are you passionate about the conversation around racism? Hi, I'm! Reverend Dr. Tlc. Host of the dismantled Racism show which airs every Thursday at eleven Am. Eastern on top radio, Dot, Nyc: join me and my amazing guest as we discuss ways to uncover, dismantle and eradicate racism. That's Thursday at eleven o'clock A. M. On talk radio, dot Nyc.
00:30:22.360 --> 00:30:27.619 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Are you a small business trying to navigate the Covid. Nineteen related employment laws.
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00:30:49.130 --> 00:30:50.060 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Mhm
00:30:53.670 --> 00:31:17.720 www.TalkRadio.nyc: everybody. It's to me deed and nonprofit sector, Connecticut coming at you from my adding each week here on top radio that Ny. Z: I hosted program, but i'll have them in focus. But nonprofits in practice each and every day, and it's my focus to help them amplify their message and tell their story. Listen. Each week at ten Am. We should stand in time until eleven Am. Is in standard time right here on talk radio, Dot Nyc:
00:31:18.820 --> 00:31:28.339 www.TalkRadio.nyc: You're listening to talk radio and Yc: at Ww: talk radio, dot and live Scene: now broadcasting twenty, four hours a day,
00:31:29.970 --> 00:31:30.860 www.TalkRadio.nyc: you,
00:31:53.590 --> 00:32:00.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and welcome back to the conscious, consulting hour awakening humanity. So we're talking all about family
00:32:01.440 --> 00:32:07.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I entitled to show the heartbreak of family. But you know family isn't only about heartbreak.
00:32:07.820 --> 00:32:17.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we get a lot of good stuff from our family. Now I've been talking about kind of the energy that we take on from our parents.
00:32:17.920 --> 00:32:21.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But sometimes we don't feel very connected with our family,
00:32:22.300 --> 00:32:26.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it could be, you know, whether it's our parents or a siblings.
00:32:26.900 --> 00:32:33.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes, when we're young we feel more connected to our friends or someone else's family.
00:32:35.030 --> 00:32:42.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I I remember as a kid, I wasn't the only one. There are many kids who had said, You know my friends are my family.
00:32:44.360 --> 00:32:47.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so, if we look at what is it about
00:32:48.040 --> 00:32:49.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: these other people?
00:32:49.980 --> 00:32:54.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What with their qualities that made us feel like they're our family.
00:32:56.620 --> 00:33:01.249 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It was something we were looking for, something that we felt lacking in
00:33:05.870 --> 00:33:06.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: now
00:33:07.350 --> 00:33:12.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: mending the relationship with our mother and father is something
00:33:13.720 --> 00:33:17.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we we may not get to in while they are alive,
00:33:20.560 --> 00:33:24.529 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but it's something we that if we strive for
00:33:24.770 --> 00:33:29.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that, if we are able to face it as we do our own inner work.
00:33:31.140 --> 00:33:39.569 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If we can truly learn to reconcile ourselves and our experiences to those of our parents, it will serve us greatly.
00:33:39.920 --> 00:33:44.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We'll serve our own sense of self-acceptance,
00:33:49.220 --> 00:33:50.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because
00:33:51.700 --> 00:33:54.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our parents and our families,
00:33:55.260 --> 00:33:59.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: they're really reflections of who we are,
00:34:03.100 --> 00:34:12.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the more we antagonize those aspects of ourselves, the more we separate ourselves from those aspects of ourselves,
00:34:13.360 --> 00:34:15.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the more we're not whole,
00:34:16.600 --> 00:34:20.499 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the more we're not accepting who we are,
00:34:20.710 --> 00:34:26.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and accepting who we are does not mean we have to live into the same patterns,
00:34:29.190 --> 00:34:33.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but it's about accepting who and what we are and where we came from
00:34:34.040 --> 00:34:38.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to shine a light on it, to see it clearly,
00:34:38.679 --> 00:34:43.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even, and especially the parts we don't like,
00:34:46.320 --> 00:34:49.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that we can begin the path towards
00:34:50.020 --> 00:34:51.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: becoming more whole,
00:34:53.219 --> 00:35:01.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because as long as we are separating ourselves, as long as we are making our parents wrong, we're making ourselves wrong,
00:35:01.930 --> 00:35:06.809 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and as long as we're making some aspect of ourselves wrong,
00:35:09.880 --> 00:35:16.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that we will never have the wholeness and the peace that we really want in our lives.
00:35:19.460 --> 00:35:21.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So, as I mentioned before
00:35:21.960 --> 00:35:23.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our parents,
00:35:23.660 --> 00:35:25.469 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who they were,
00:35:25.580 --> 00:35:30.510 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was informed by their parents and their experiences in life,
00:35:30.890 --> 00:35:36.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who, we are, is informed by our parents and the experiences in our life,
00:35:36.940 --> 00:35:42.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the and the mother and father are type informed different sides of ourselves.
00:35:43.620 --> 00:35:52.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So what do we do with those sides of ourselves like? Maybe we don't have a great relationship with money because we didn't have a great relationship with our dad,
00:35:53.080 --> 00:36:06.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Or maybe we had a an abusive relationship with our mother. And so all of our relationships with other people tend to feel abusive. What do we do with that? How do we change? How do we shift it.
00:36:07.530 --> 00:36:10.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The first thing is to recognize it.
00:36:10.490 --> 00:36:15.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The second thing is to accept that that's the way it has been up until now
00:36:17.130 --> 00:36:19.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and then. The third thing is
00:36:19.710 --> 00:36:22.479 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to decide to make a choice
00:36:22.690 --> 00:36:25.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of how we want to be differently.
00:36:25.320 --> 00:36:28.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now. Sometimes that choice needs to be supported.
00:36:29.250 --> 00:36:32.509 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we need help, sometimes professional help
00:36:32.940 --> 00:36:47.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: seeing a therapist is always a wonderful idea to get a different perspective, and maybe it's not a therapist. Maybe it's a coach. Maybe it's an energy worker would, or maybe it's some kind of teacher or mentor whatever works for you.
00:36:49.970 --> 00:36:55.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But once we've made the decision that we want to show up differently.
00:36:57.630 --> 00:37:00.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about following the feeling
00:37:00.250 --> 00:37:02.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and catching ourselves
00:37:04.240 --> 00:37:08.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when that feeling feels like it comes from a very young place
00:37:09.330 --> 00:37:19.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: like Oh, when I had that argument with that person. I felt like I was a little kid being scolded by my father, and I hated how powerless that made me feel,
00:37:22.040 --> 00:37:24.509 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: recognizing that
00:37:27.150 --> 00:37:30.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: i'm being able to stop in the moment and take a breath
00:37:31.190 --> 00:37:37.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and say, You know what i'm. Not that little kid anymore. I'm not powerless. And this is not my father.
00:37:37.830 --> 00:37:43.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There's no reason for me to project that feeling onto another person.
00:37:45.940 --> 00:37:51.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There's no reason for me to be angry with them. Going back to our little section for my book today.
00:37:52.810 --> 00:37:55.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: How can I respond differently
00:38:03.760 --> 00:38:11.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and look the first time we try and catch ourselves. We may not catch it until five minutes after the fact, or an hour after the fact.
00:38:12.550 --> 00:38:18.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But the more vigilant we are, the more we try and pay attention to our patterns to our behaviors.
00:38:19.340 --> 00:38:21.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Is that feeling?
00:38:21.990 --> 00:38:26.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We come closer and closer and closer and closer and closer to catching ourselves,
00:38:28.680 --> 00:38:31.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and then when we're in it in the moment,
00:38:32.140 --> 00:38:41.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it's like, Oh, this is that feeling! This is what I've been paying attention to. This is a habitual way. I respond, and it doesn't serve me.
00:38:44.220 --> 00:38:49.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Hmm. Now we could stop when we catch ourselves right in the moment,
00:38:50.300 --> 00:39:05.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it's like, Do I really want to respond this way? Do I want to live into this habit, or do I want to change it? And then we have all the power in the world, because then it is up to us to make a different choice and a different decision,
00:39:08.280 --> 00:39:15.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it's up to us to give ourselves what Perhaps maybe we never got as as children,
00:39:19.400 --> 00:39:25.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and Maybe we never felt validated. We never got validation, so we have to give that validation to ourselves.
00:39:27.100 --> 00:39:37.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe we never felt like we measured up as kids because our parents put our siblings on a higher pedestal than us. So it's up to us to put ourselves
00:39:37.520 --> 00:39:41.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: on a higher pedestal, and to raise ourselves up
00:39:42.840 --> 00:39:45.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and to say, Hey, It's okay to be me,
00:39:46.840 --> 00:39:49.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and i'm not perfect, and I don't have to be perfect.
00:39:52.060 --> 00:39:54.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I just have to be me.
00:39:55.840 --> 00:40:04.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But to truly be ourselves. We need to be awake and aware and conscious of all the things that we're doing.
00:40:06.260 --> 00:40:12.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now, look, it may sound like it's exhausting work it doesn't have to be. It can be a game.
00:40:12.610 --> 00:40:16.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can make it a game, and every night maybe we
00:40:16.870 --> 00:40:32.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: right in our journal and reflect on our day, and it's like Oh, I missed catching myself by ten minutes today, tomorrow i'm going to shoot for seven minutes. Oh, I I did this today and tomorrow i'm going to make sure I um tomorrow. I'm gonna work towards catching myself, so I don't repeat that pattern
00:40:33.740 --> 00:40:38.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: doesn't have to be work. It can be fun, it can be play.
00:40:38.430 --> 00:40:41.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It just depends on the energy we bring to it
00:40:45.530 --> 00:40:51.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and look just because there are sides of ourselves. We are not so happy about
00:40:51.500 --> 00:40:53.640 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: does not mean that we're broken.
00:40:54.680 --> 00:40:56.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And I really,
00:40:56.330 --> 00:40:58.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I want you all to hear this:
00:41:00.230 --> 00:41:02.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that no matter
00:41:02.400 --> 00:41:11.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how detrimental the family environment we came from was, we are not broken,
00:41:12.640 --> 00:41:24.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: does not mean we cannot be more conscious, does not mean we cannot make different decisions, does not mean, we cannot improve and do better according to our own standards,
00:41:28.210 --> 00:41:33.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but we are whole, perfect, exactly the way we are,
00:41:34.770 --> 00:41:37.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we can choose
00:41:38.360 --> 00:41:40.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to be even better.
00:41:41.990 --> 00:41:45.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can choose to be more conscious.
00:41:45.910 --> 00:41:53.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can choose to shine a light on those areas of ourselves that we don't like looking at.
00:41:53.790 --> 00:42:05.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And the funny thing is, we don't have to tell anybody else about it. I mean, if you're working with a therapist, you're working with a coach, you might want to share it, but we don't have to. We may want to, but we don't have to.
00:42:05.340 --> 00:42:09.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's all an inside job it's all internal work,
00:42:11.890 --> 00:42:14.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so nobody has to know
00:42:14.360 --> 00:42:16.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what we're struggling with,
00:42:17.110 --> 00:42:22.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and just because it's a struggle does not mean it's a necessarily a bad thing.
00:42:23.190 --> 00:42:25.999 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Struggle sometimes builds muscle.
00:42:26.580 --> 00:42:30.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It it it builds our strength sometimes now,
00:42:31.120 --> 00:42:37.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when the struggle is too much, and it's constant over time, it wears us down, so it's knowing
00:42:38.180 --> 00:42:45.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where to put our effort, and when to practice self-care and when to take a break,
00:42:47.570 --> 00:43:01.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because if all we do is work, work, work, work, work on ourselves, it's very easy to get caught in that trap where, like Oh, my God, there's so many problems there, so much wrong with me so much this! Oh, my God! I can't take it anymore. No, that's not what this is about.
00:43:02.630 --> 00:43:05.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Absolutely not what this is about.
00:43:09.720 --> 00:43:11.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's just about
00:43:11.400 --> 00:43:18.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being okay with who we are and shining a light on it, and truly getting to know ourselves,
00:43:18.240 --> 00:43:21.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because all knowledge and understands
00:43:21.440 --> 00:43:30.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: an understanding comes from knowing ourselves first, and when we know ourselves first, then we know other people.
00:43:32.750 --> 00:43:38.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's all inside of us. Mystics have been saying this for thousands of years.
00:43:38.910 --> 00:43:40.919 It's all inside of us,
00:43:41.930 --> 00:43:51.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the more we pay attention to the better we get to know ourselves. The more answers we have, the more we understand why people do what they do,
00:43:53.450 --> 00:43:56.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because they're human beings just like we are.
00:43:59.900 --> 00:44:08.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So there was a key point for myself where I was able to reconcile with my parents with internally with my parents.
00:44:10.390 --> 00:44:13.369 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But i'm going to save that for this last segment.
00:44:14.260 --> 00:44:19.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So I hope you'll stay tuned. I hope i'm not boring you guys. I'm hope this is interesting enough,
00:44:21.310 --> 00:44:24.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and when we come back i'm going to tell you
00:44:24.940 --> 00:44:30.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for me, just for me, what was the key to really learning to be a piece
00:44:30.880 --> 00:44:35.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with my family with my parents.
00:44:37.570 --> 00:44:40.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Excuse me, so please stay tuned.
00:44:40.740 --> 00:44:42.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You're listening to
00:44:43.160 --> 00:44:47.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the conscious consultant. Hour will be right back in just a moment.
00:44:55.770 --> 00:44:59.069 www.TalkRadio.nyc: You
00:45:23.960 --> 00:45:28.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: all right. Time to uh
00:45:29.400 --> 00:45:32.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: time to wrap this up. So,
00:45:33.610 --> 00:45:37.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: as I mentioned before the break, there was a moment when
00:45:38.110 --> 00:45:42.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I was really able to reconcile myself with both my parents
00:45:42.640 --> 00:45:44.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: with my feelings towards them.
00:45:45.300 --> 00:45:50.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I was fortunate I was able to do it before my mom passed, but my dad passed many, many years ago,
00:45:51.280 --> 00:46:00.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but it actually wasn't that important for me to reconcile it with them. Physically, it was about reconciling my relationship with them internally,
00:46:03.340 --> 00:46:07.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it was a challenging place to get to, but I did
00:46:07.960 --> 00:46:09.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: eventually get there,
00:46:10.860 --> 00:46:12.989 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it was that moment
00:46:14.230 --> 00:46:17.240 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when I was finally able to see
00:46:17.390 --> 00:46:19.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: my mother and my father
00:46:19.860 --> 00:46:25.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: as a man and a woman, not as just a mother and father,
00:46:26.230 --> 00:46:27.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because my mother
00:46:27.920 --> 00:46:31.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: had a whole life before I was born.
00:46:31.880 --> 00:46:36.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: My father also. He had a whole life before I was born.
00:46:37.200 --> 00:46:44.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They both had their own experiences, their own challenges, their own relationships with their mothers and fathers.
00:46:47.440 --> 00:46:52.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so, when I was able to see them as just human beings.
00:46:54.370 --> 00:46:57.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It finally sank into me
00:46:59.540 --> 00:47:01.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that they were doing the best they could,
00:47:03.380 --> 00:47:07.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I could criticize them all I want.
00:47:07.530 --> 00:47:15.189 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I could come up with all kinds of ways in which they they could have done a better job, and could have done something differently.
00:47:19.120 --> 00:47:20.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But the truth is,
00:47:21.030 --> 00:47:27.239 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I don't know, because I didn't live in their shoes. I didn't live their life. I lived my life.
00:47:27.440 --> 00:47:37.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I have no idea the pain, the challenges, the circumstances that they grew up in that they lived through. I mean, I know some of the stories,
00:47:38.270 --> 00:47:42.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but I don't know what it was like to be them.
00:47:45.730 --> 00:47:47.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So when I
00:47:47.950 --> 00:47:49.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: realize that
00:47:50.380 --> 00:47:53.889 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when I was able to see that
00:47:54.840 --> 00:47:56.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: truly
00:47:56.420 --> 00:47:59.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: like and feel it in my body,
00:48:00.110 --> 00:48:04.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: then it was like a real sense of peace came over me.
00:48:06.400 --> 00:48:08.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Then I was able to,
00:48:08.810 --> 00:48:12.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: on my side of the relationship
00:48:13.500 --> 00:48:16.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and honor them for their side of the relationship.
00:48:20.900 --> 00:48:27.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So can I criticize them about things I did. Sure I can. Does it do any good? Not really
00:48:27.800 --> 00:48:31.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because they couldn't do any differently from what they did.
00:48:34.900 --> 00:48:38.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But the power is in me. The power is in you
00:48:38.820 --> 00:48:41.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to do something different.
00:48:42.050 --> 00:48:51.659 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Because if you're listening to this broadcast, if you're listening to this show. You're listening to it for a reason. There's some message in here
00:48:51.800 --> 00:48:53.849 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that's just for you,
00:48:56.770 --> 00:48:58.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and indeed,
00:49:01.670 --> 00:49:06.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you can make a different choice. I can make a different choice,
00:49:07.960 --> 00:49:15.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we can make a different choice every single day of our lives.
00:49:19.110 --> 00:49:20.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's not
00:49:22.090 --> 00:49:27.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that we're always going to be perfect. It's not that we're always going to make the quote unquote right choice.
00:49:30.250 --> 00:49:39.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But it's about making a more aware choice, a more conscious choice, a more intentional choice.
00:49:43.300 --> 00:49:46.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So We may have heartbreak from our family,
00:49:47.730 --> 00:49:52.369 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but it's our choice how we choose to respond to that heartbreak,
00:49:54.090 --> 00:49:58.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and do we allow it to rule us for the rest of our lives,
00:50:00.690 --> 00:50:05.029 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or do we take it as a blessing? Do we take it as a lesson?
00:50:05.150 --> 00:50:09.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Do we take it as something that can make us stronger.
00:50:09.330 --> 00:50:11.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's something that tears us down.
00:50:12.180 --> 00:50:14.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Can we learn
00:50:15.420 --> 00:50:16.639 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to take
00:50:16.660 --> 00:50:20.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the lessons we want to learn from from our parents
00:50:20.770 --> 00:50:24.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and put aside the lessons we don't want to take from our parents,
00:50:25.640 --> 00:50:28.400 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and when we see ourselves
00:50:29.440 --> 00:50:35.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: living into a pattern that comes at least from our perception from one of our parents.
00:50:35.940 --> 00:50:37.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Can we catch ourselves?
00:50:38.480 --> 00:50:43.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Can we say to ourselves, Oh, I know where that comes from.
00:50:43.520 --> 00:50:44.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know what?
00:50:45.420 --> 00:50:46.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Not today.
00:50:47.440 --> 00:50:50.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I don't want to make that choice. Today
00:50:50.460 --> 00:50:52.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I want to make a different choice.
00:50:54.240 --> 00:50:58.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And again, the kinder and gentler we can be with ourselves,
00:50:59.100 --> 00:51:08.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: knowing that this is not easy work, that it takes diligence. It takes practice. It takes integrating this way of being into our life.
00:51:10.890 --> 00:51:15.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A lot of people won't do it. A lot of people will never even be aware of it.
00:51:16.920 --> 00:51:18.479 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But that's okay,
00:51:18.670 --> 00:51:25.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because it's a path that we chose. It's a path that we have decided to walk upon.
00:51:27.360 --> 00:51:29.059 And like, I said,
00:51:30.790 --> 00:51:34.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: if you are listening to this broadcast, it's because you've made a choice,
00:51:37.060 --> 00:51:40.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even if you weren't aware of this before you're aware of it now.
00:51:43.140 --> 00:51:47.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So what do we do? Moving forward? How do we live our life?
00:51:49.200 --> 00:51:51.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well, I would say, start with,
00:51:52.110 --> 00:51:54.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: How do you want to live your life?
00:51:54.870 --> 00:51:58.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What kinds of choices do you want to make differently?
00:51:58.980 --> 00:52:05.389 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What kinds of ways of being do you want to be different? How do you want to show up differently.
00:52:06.790 --> 00:52:12.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we we don't even know how we want to be. We just know we want to be different.
00:52:12.760 --> 00:52:15.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Let's start with defining.
00:52:16.130 --> 00:52:20.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Who are we? And how do we want to live our lives?
00:52:21.240 --> 00:52:22.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Let's come up with
00:52:23.040 --> 00:52:25.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our idea. Let's come up with
00:52:26.330 --> 00:52:29.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the future us that we want to live into?
00:52:29.950 --> 00:52:36.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We first have to describe it, we have to imagine it. We have to see it in our mind's eye.
00:52:37.040 --> 00:52:40.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: If it's just some nebulous goal,
00:52:41.700 --> 00:52:43.529 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it doesn't mean anything?
00:52:45.390 --> 00:52:50.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Are we more confident, more kind, more compassionate, more peaceful,
00:52:50.750 --> 00:52:52.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: more loving,
00:52:53.040 --> 00:52:54.769 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: more helpful,
00:52:55.590 --> 00:53:00.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know, more diligent. Whatever the characteristics are, it lists them out.
00:53:01.220 --> 00:53:04.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This is the way I want to be. It's not who I am.
00:53:04.810 --> 00:53:09.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But this is the way I want to be. This is the way I want to show up in the world
00:53:10.920 --> 00:53:12.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and just pay attention
00:53:12.810 --> 00:53:16.189 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: once we've decided this is the way we want to be.
00:53:16.310 --> 00:53:20.849 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Pay attention to when we are that way reinforce the positive
00:53:21.090 --> 00:53:23.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and notice when we're not being that way.
00:53:24.600 --> 00:53:28.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And when we're not being the way we want to be
00:53:29.120 --> 00:53:33.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: well, that's a little clue for us. That's a little hint.
00:53:33.790 --> 00:53:36.439 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's a little thing to let us know
00:53:37.570 --> 00:53:39.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that, like hey?
00:53:40.230 --> 00:53:42.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's time to try something different.
00:53:45.980 --> 00:53:47.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:53:47.870 --> 00:53:49.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that's how we get started.
00:53:50.480 --> 00:53:53.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It all starts with awareness,
00:53:53.940 --> 00:53:58.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: starts with awareness, making a decision, taking action.
00:53:59.540 --> 00:54:04.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's a relatively simple process, but it's not easy.
00:54:05.510 --> 00:54:11.439 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It requires vigilance. It requires desire. It requires a willingness to
00:54:11.550 --> 00:54:15.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to try something different, to be a little different,
00:54:17.040 --> 00:54:18.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so I hope
00:54:19.140 --> 00:54:22.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that this is something that might appeal to you.
00:54:22.330 --> 00:54:25.479 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I hope that this is something that might serve you.
00:54:26.030 --> 00:54:28.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I hope that this is something that
00:54:32.810 --> 00:54:35.240 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that lifts you up
00:54:35.550 --> 00:54:41.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that actually makes you feel like, Oh, my God, like I can do this,
00:54:42.400 --> 00:54:48.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that I can live a better life, that I can enjoy myself more; that I can have more peace,
00:54:48.090 --> 00:54:49.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: more fun,
00:54:55.130 --> 00:54:56.779 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I hope that
00:54:57.500 --> 00:54:59.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it will serve you.
00:54:59.470 --> 00:55:00.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And I hope that
00:55:01.530 --> 00:55:04.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this perspective on family,
00:55:04.810 --> 00:55:08.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this perspective on where we come from,
00:55:10.080 --> 00:55:14.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's not something. It's not something to use as a way of
00:55:14.690 --> 00:55:17.029 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a of of
00:55:17.290 --> 00:55:26.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: antagonizing ourselves from our parents or ancestors, or telling uh, or criticizing them, and saying how bad they are.
00:55:26.380 --> 00:55:28.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's a way of honoring them,
00:55:30.760 --> 00:55:32.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because ultimately
00:55:34.600 --> 00:55:40.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: all any somewhat normal parent wants is for their children to be happy.
00:55:44.990 --> 00:55:47.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So maybe we just start with that.
00:55:50.670 --> 00:55:58.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And if you don't believe that your parents wanted you to be happy, it doesn't matter if it's what you want,
00:55:58.700 --> 00:56:01.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: then it's something for you to focus on.
00:56:05.100 --> 00:56:06.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:56:07.450 --> 00:56:10.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I guess that's what I have to say for this week,
00:56:12.250 --> 00:56:16.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it's to let you know that the heartbreak of family doesn't have to be a heartbreak,
00:56:17.490 --> 00:56:20.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because sometimes when the heart breaks it breaks open,
00:56:20.850 --> 00:56:24.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and maybe just maybe there's something
00:56:24.920 --> 00:56:28.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that you've heard over the last hour or so
00:56:28.740 --> 00:56:31.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that opens your heart to your family,
00:56:38.750 --> 00:56:47.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that if you do have to see your family, and maybe you don't usually look forward to seeing your family. Maybe there's something about your family. You don't really like
00:56:48.050 --> 00:56:51.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that. You can be just a little bit more compassionate.
00:56:51.130 --> 00:56:58.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And remember they're just human beings bumping around trying to do the best they can
00:56:58.440 --> 00:56:59.940 with what they have,
00:57:00.400 --> 00:57:02.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just like all of us.
00:57:03.190 --> 00:57:08.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So thank you for tuning in. Thank you, my loyal listeners. Without you
00:57:08.370 --> 00:57:12.089 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's just not worth doing the show. Um!
00:57:12.290 --> 00:57:27.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And if you missed any part of it and you want to catch the replay you can always catch it on Talk radio down. Nyc: We're also on all the podcasting platforms. Apple Google Stitcher Spotify Pandora. I heart radio. We're all over the place.
00:57:27.940 --> 00:57:37.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So look for the conscious consulting hour, and if you can't find, just let me know. You can always reach me at Sam at talk radio, dot Nyc: Thank you all for tuning in,
00:57:38.510 --> 00:57:42.209 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we will see you next week hopefully with a very special guest.
00:57:42.260 --> 00:57:53.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Um! I have to check my schedule and see what it's going to be, but we'll see you all, and we'll talk to you all next week. Stay tuned for all the other shows on the network. Thank you all, love you. Take care.
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