The Mind Behind Leadership

Thursday, September 24, 2020
Facebook Live Video from 2020/09/24 - The Platinum Rule of Leadership

The Mind Behind Leadership

The Platinum Rule of Leadership We'll be exploring the leadership behaviors that make a difference on our influence and engagement. To do this, we're lucky to have one of the World's leading experts on behavior and impact. Dr. Tony Alessandra has a street-wise, college-smart perspective on business, having been raised in the housing projects of NYC to eventually realizing success as a graduate professor of marketing, entrepreneur, business author, and hall-of-fame keynote speaker. He earned a BBA from the Univ. of Notre Dame, an MBA from the Univ. of Connecticut and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University. Dr. Alessandra is a prolific author with 27 books translated into over 50 foreign language editions, including the newly revised, best selling The NEW Art of Managing People, Charisma, The Platinum Rule, Collaborative Selling and Communicating at Work. He is featured in over 100 audio/video programs and films, including Relationship Strategies, The Dynamics of Effective Listening and Non-Manipulative Selling.

Posted by Talking Alternative Broadcasting on Thursday, September 24, 2020

2020/09/24 - The Platinum Rule of Leadership

[NEW EPISODE] The Platinum Rule of Leadership

We'll be exploring the leadership behaviors that make a difference on our influence and engagement. To do this, we're lucky to have one of the World's leading experts on behavior and impact.

Dr. Tony Alessandra has a street-wise, college-smart perspective on business, having been raised in the housing projects of NYC to eventually realizing success as a graduate professor of marketing, entrepreneur, business author, and hall-of-fame keynote speaker. He earned a BBA from the Univ. of Notre Dame, an MBA from the Univ. of Connecticut and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University.

Dr. Alessandra is a prolific author with 27 books translated into over 50 foreign language editions, including the newly revised, best selling The NEW Art of Managing People, Charisma, The Platinum Rule, Collaborative Selling and Communicating at Work. He is featured in over 100 audio/video programs and films, including Relationship Strategies, The Dynamics of Effective Listening and Non-Manipulative Selling.

Tune in for this insightful conversation at or watch the Facebook Livestream by clicking here.

Show Notes

Segment 1

Graham welcomes Dr.  Alessandra, earned a BBA from the Univ. of Notre Dame, an MBA from the Univ. of Connecticut and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University and much more accolades.  Dr. Alessandra talks about his early life, growing up in housing projects in NYC making his way to New Jersey and then began school in Notre Dame.  From there he did more traveling and now resides in San Diego where he began his career as a professional speaker but is always a New Yorker at heart.  Dr. Alessandra further speaks about what led him into sales and sales trading.  And then his evolution into full time speaking.  This includes how his business started expanding based on his style, experiences and the change to visual speakers vs. only audio.  

Segment 2

Graham asks Dr. Alessandra how difficult it was to give up a steady job after 8 years when he was a professor, which was a difficult choice.  He further speaks about how his mother drove him to “go the extra inch” which if you do enough adds up to a mile and how he is constantly working on self-improvement.  And they discuss how each journey is completed step by step and don’t be too impatient to reach their goals.   They close this segment talking about how technology is changing the game for public speakers today.  

Segment 3

They begin this segment discussing psychology in selling and Dr. Alessandra’s thoughts/experiences on this subject.  Building on this Dr. Alessandra further talks about his assessment business and how his public speeches have evolved from when his business started.  They close this segment Dr. Alessandra discusses the ‘The Platinum Rule’ and how it is important to adapt to different styles with different people.  

Segment 4

In the final segment they dive further into Dr. Alessandra’s assessments and using it in today’s COVID world.  He discusses one of his assessments, ‘Hire Sense’, which helps in hiring, especially in today’s environment.  ‘Hire Sense’ inserts some objectivity into the hiring process and the assessment has been very successful for companies who have used it.  The assessments will also help with teamwork, in person and virtual. Graham asks how Dr. Alessandra was able to accomplish all he did and wrote 30 books.  We close with Dr. Alessandra’s 3 top traits for leadership.  


00:00:34.080 --> 00:00:48.540 Graham Dobbin: Good evening and welcome to the mind behind the leadership live on talk radio dot NYC. My name is Graham Dobbin in every week we speak with real leaders and entrepreneurs from a variety of fields about their own personal journeys.

00:00:48.990 --> 00:00:57.870 Graham Dobbin: We explore what makes a successful leader that type of hurdles to overcome and obviously gain some real life insights now. Tonight we are incredibly lucky.

00:00:58.200 --> 00:01:03.810 Graham Dobbin: We don't just have someone who's a great leader. We've got someone who's seen as a world leader in their field.

00:01:04.290 --> 00:01:08.040 Graham Dobbin: And not feel just happens to be helping making other people successful

00:01:08.550 --> 00:01:17.040 Graham Dobbin: So tonight we have Dr 20 hour Sandra and he's been described as having a streetwise college smart perspective on business.

00:01:17.400 --> 00:01:27.000 Graham Dobbin: He was raised here in New York City and the hosting projects and heroes eventually to having a successful career as a graduate, professor of marketing.

00:01:27.480 --> 00:01:32.430 Graham Dobbin: And internet entrepreneur a business, author and a Hall of Fame keynote speaker.

00:01:32.940 --> 00:01:42.900 Graham Dobbin: He under BBA from Notre dam an MBA from the University of Connecticut and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University. But there's more.

00:01:43.320 --> 00:01:51.930 Graham Dobbin: There's a lot more is also a prolific author of 30 books which would be translated into wakefulness 50 foreign languages. The books include

00:01:52.710 --> 00:02:00.270 Graham Dobbin: The newly newly revised the new art of managing people charisma plug the platinum rule, which we will no doubt speak about this evening.

00:02:00.630 --> 00:02:20.820 Graham Dobbin: And the collaborative selling and communicating at work. Dr. Alessandra was also inducted into the NSA speakers Hall of Fame and in 2012 Dr. Tony was voted as a number one world's top communication Gouda Wow, good evening. Dr. Tony Alessandra

00:02:21.870 --> 00:02:23.520 Tony Alessandra: Well, thank you for having me on the show.

00:02:24.450 --> 00:02:26.460 Graham Dobbin: Thank you. Thank you for a New Yorker.

00:02:27.780 --> 00:02:42.540 Graham Dobbin: Be prepared to speak just Scotsmen sitting in New York live on talk radio dot NYC. Um, one of the things I've seen written about you on regular is that you came from the hosting projects here here in the city and rose up, how did that journey start for you.

00:02:43.740 --> 00:02:52.560 Tony Alessandra: Well, I live in the Chelsea area of New York on 26th STREET BETWEEN Eighth and Ninth Avenue. There's those four big

00:02:53.640 --> 00:03:03.390 Tony Alessandra: housing project buildings. I live there. When we move from there, we move to sort of the Bensonhurst Coney Island section of Brooklyn.

00:03:04.230 --> 00:03:21.870 Tony Alessandra: And then eventually to Jersey City and the Jersey Shore Toms River, New Jersey. So first 18 years of my life. New York City Brooklyn jersey, as you said, then went out to South Bend, Indiana for four years to Notre Dame.

00:03:22.890 --> 00:03:34.380 Tony Alessandra: Back to the University of Connecticut in Storrs Connecticut, then a couple of years in Pennsylvania, where I was teaching at Susquehanna University, which was a

00:03:35.280 --> 00:03:52.380 Tony Alessandra: Sort of an Amish town. It really was praising somebody who grew up in New York City. Being an Amish town, you know, where every Saturday, a horse and buggy would come up with all the vegetables, etc. In the bank quite an eye opener.

00:03:53.790 --> 00:04:03.120 Tony Alessandra: Then we moved to California for a year than to Georgia for my PhD Georgia State University in Atlanta. Three years then moved out here.

00:04:04.140 --> 00:04:13.350 Tony Alessandra: Out here being San Diego 1976 to take a job as a an assistant professor of marketing at the University of San Diego.

00:04:15.060 --> 00:04:35.220 Tony Alessandra: Taught there until December of 78 when I decided to sort of cut out on my own and become a full time professional speaker. So that's kind of the background. But even though I've been away from New York for a long time. I am a dyed in the wool New Yorker. You never take it out of me.

00:04:35.670 --> 00:04:41.820 Graham Dobbin: That's kind of something that we've probably got in common. You can take the Scotsman out of Scotland, but we're always going to be Scott's

00:04:43.290 --> 00:04:51.720 Graham Dobbin: I'm really curious. How do you go from being a professor at a university to being a professional speaker, what's that, a leap like

00:04:52.800 --> 00:05:09.390 Tony Alessandra: Well it. Well, here's an interesting thing. So when I was out in California in 1972 I just for that one year I taught professional sales at Cal State Fullerton, one of the universities there.

00:05:10.110 --> 00:05:17.400 Tony Alessandra: And one of the students, one of my students came up to me and he showed me this this test that he had taken called the

00:05:18.210 --> 00:05:26.580 Tony Alessandra: Strong vocational test and basically it told you what occupations, you would be best at.

00:05:27.240 --> 00:05:39.240 Tony Alessandra: And he said, hey, it's free and it's free for faculty. And I said, I'm going to go take it. I really want to see what what they say about me. So I took it. I got the results back. Number three. That was a whole bunch, but I'm

00:05:39.300 --> 00:05:40.470 Graham Dobbin: Just gonna be three.

00:05:40.800 --> 00:05:47.100 Tony Alessandra: Number three was marketing and merchandising, whoa, yeah that's me number

00:05:48.210 --> 00:05:59.790 Tony Alessandra: Sales. That's me. Number one, I said this is this is ridiculous. It's totally wrong and I filed it away. So I'm going to come back to that.

00:06:01.740 --> 00:06:04.230 Tony Alessandra: When I went for my PhD.

00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:20.910 Tony Alessandra: My doctoral dissertation chairman was a gentleman named Dr. David Schwartz, Dr. David Schwartz was a multi million best selling author of a book called The Magic of Thinking Big

00:06:21.630 --> 00:06:24.240 Tony Alessandra: It was a book that I read as a teenager had an

00:06:24.330 --> 00:06:38.910 Tony Alessandra: incredible impact on me, one of my my top three books, you know, from my childhood and when he decided an accepted that he would be my doctoral dissertation Chairman. I went out to Georgia State.

00:06:40.110 --> 00:06:49.740 Tony Alessandra: He also was at the time a professional speaker. He was speaking maybe 100 times a year, mostly for Amway big meetings.

00:06:49.800 --> 00:06:57.030 Tony Alessandra: Yep, because they were a big buyer of his book, so I guess that kind of

00:06:58.680 --> 00:07:03.000 Tony Alessandra: Sort of subconsciously, I'm looking at that and I'm saying, wow.

00:07:04.200 --> 00:07:20.340 Tony Alessandra: Well, Georgia State is a major urban business university that's beyond that. But, but it really was a big business University and whenever calls would come in from the community of Atlanta big, urban city.

00:07:21.390 --> 00:07:25.170 Tony Alessandra: If it was a marketing request that would go to the marketing department.

00:07:25.200 --> 00:07:28.740 Tony Alessandra: And if it wasn't sales request it came to me.

00:07:29.760 --> 00:07:42.690 Tony Alessandra: So that's how I started really in 1974 going out and you know after I finished all my coursework going out and doing some sales consulting

00:07:43.170 --> 00:07:56.130 Tony Alessandra: It led to sales training and even in my sales training people would say, hey, could you come to my company or my trade association and could you speak on that subject to my group. So anyway,

00:07:56.700 --> 00:08:12.540 Tony Alessandra: For the next couple of years while I was writing my dissertation, all the way through, let's say, May, June of 1976 because may as the end of May have 76 is when I finished my my PhD.

00:08:14.280 --> 00:08:28.020 Tony Alessandra: I was starting to do training and mostly sales training came out to San Diego decided to also do some speaking and in September of 1978

00:08:29.040 --> 00:08:48.090 Tony Alessandra: The dean of the School of Business at the University of San Diego gave me an ultimatum and he said, Tony, you are either going to be a full time faculty member, or you are going to be a full time speaker, you can't do both, which I disagree with, because I was doing both and doing well.

00:08:49.320 --> 00:08:54.930 Tony Alessandra: But he did make me make a choice. And since at that point I had been teaching

00:08:56.010 --> 00:09:16.020 Tony Alessandra: At the university level eight years. I said, You know what, I'm going to put my resignation. And I'm going to go out and start speaking professionally, which I didn't start in January of 1979. So that's kind of how I got led into the speaking field. Now one last piece here.

00:09:17.250 --> 00:09:34.890 Tony Alessandra: Back in the early 90s I decide I got a really interesting scanning machine and I started scanning all my documents the paper documents into PDF digital copies and what do I find you know where I'm going with this.

00:09:34.920 --> 00:09:36.600 Graham Dobbin: Yeah, thank you. I think of my job.

00:09:37.350 --> 00:09:40.890 Tony Alessandra: I find the strong vocational number three.

00:09:41.220 --> 00:09:43.380 Tony Alessandra: Marketing merchandising number two.

00:09:43.740 --> 00:09:55.290 Tony Alessandra: Was sales. Now listen to what number one was professional speaker, but at the time it wasn't even in my frame of reference in 1972

00:09:56.640 --> 00:10:07.200 Tony Alessandra: But is that amazing that that out before I even realized that that was something that I would even consider or do or be successful in

00:10:08.280 --> 00:10:20.460 Graham Dobbin: It. Do you think that there's a train of thought when we, when we see something that may be should be for us. We kind of dismiss it. But is there an unconscious and it is moving through it. Do you prescribe to that.

00:10:20.970 --> 00:10:26.220 Tony Alessandra: I do, I do. And maybe there was that subconscious, you know,

00:10:26.250 --> 00:10:26.550 Graham Dobbin: Yeah.

00:10:26.640 --> 00:10:40.200 Tony Alessandra: I number one most professions and it made me. Maybe it made me recognize the opportunities that came in front of me, like with David Schwartz, being a speaker and

00:10:41.310 --> 00:10:53.070 Tony Alessandra: You know the requests that I was getting to do some sales consulting and training that led to speaking so I never. It was never a goal to be a speaker.

00:10:53.820 --> 00:11:11.670 Tony Alessandra: Never in my frame of reference, but things led to it and realized that I was quite good at it. But, but there was a big turning point, even in my speaking career. So I go out and 1979 and I am now a full time professional speaker.

00:11:13.020 --> 00:11:36.030 Tony Alessandra: In in mid the actually was early 1981 I believe it was one of the most incredible professional speakers gentleman named Bill Gove bill go was the very first president of the National speakers ASSOCIATION BACK IN THE EARLY 70s, they'll go comes up to me and he said, Tony.

00:11:37.650 --> 00:11:57.810 Tony Alessandra: Put me in a little headlock, he said, Tony, you your office offstage, you are funny, you are mischievous. You are a New York Italian and onstage. You are coming across to professorial

00:11:59.730 --> 00:12:12.810 Tony Alessandra: He said, Why don't you allow that New York edge come out on stage and see where it will lead and you know it was then that I allowed

00:12:13.590 --> 00:12:33.780 Tony Alessandra: My personality to really come out and it was an explosive like a shooting star success because that was in 1982 in 1985 just three years later I was inducted into the National speakers Association speakers Hall of Fame. It was that automatic

00:12:36.210 --> 00:12:37.590 Tony Alessandra: Difference in my career.

00:12:38.100 --> 00:12:48.870 Graham Dobbin: So what was the difference in the type of a band so gigs, or what were you doing differently in that three years to what you've been doing for, you know, five or six years previously.

00:12:49.650 --> 00:12:59.370 Tony Alessandra: You know, I was, I believe, doing pretty much the same thing, it was just my onstage presence that got more laughs That

00:13:01.350 --> 00:13:18.810 Tony Alessandra: You know, allowed me to connect more with people allow them to say, you know, this is a this is a down to earth guy, you know, not one of these polished professional speakers who you know doesn't do anything wrong. I mean, when I let my New York come out.

00:13:20.040 --> 00:13:24.690 Tony Alessandra: It was imagine a Polish speaker this happening to this, it would it

00:13:25.890 --> 00:13:31.800 Tony Alessandra: But you know because of my style. I would stop. And I'd say, wait a second. I'd say this to the audience. Wait a second.

00:13:32.490 --> 00:13:43.860 Tony Alessandra: What was I talking about somebody would yell out what I was talking about. And I would say, yeah, that's it. All right. And I would go on and they would, you know, LAUGH and applaud and whatever no issue whatsoever.

00:13:45.210 --> 00:13:54.660 Tony Alessandra: But I started getting more referrals more repeat business bigger audiences and and

00:13:56.040 --> 00:14:05.100 Tony Alessandra: Doing more international work then so it really it really was a big there were there were two things in my career that I think

00:14:06.630 --> 00:14:19.200 Tony Alessandra: turbocharged at one was what Bill go sent to me, which was in 81 and, you know, a few years later, the Hall of Fame, but an ad. It was either 86 or 87

00:14:20.610 --> 00:14:26.580 Tony Alessandra: One of my colleagues, a gentleman named Blaine Longfellow Dr lane Longfellow incredible speaker.

00:14:27.780 --> 00:14:42.480 Tony Alessandra: Living here in San Diego, at the time, although he really wasn't from San Diego. He just lived here for maybe two or three years he shows me a video now up to that point. All Speakers had audio.

00:14:42.510 --> 00:14:47.550 Tony Alessandra: Cassette demo tapes. We used to send these audio cassette demo tapes to people.

00:14:49.080 --> 00:14:53.190 Tony Alessandra: But remember, I'm a New Yorker. I'm a visual speaker Italian

00:14:54.420 --> 00:15:02.100 Tony Alessandra: And of course the audio doesn't show my body language and facial expressions, I look at his video, which was the first

00:15:02.910 --> 00:15:17.760 Tony Alessandra: demo video in the national speakers Association, and I said, this is the future I immediately went out and created one and my career for the next three or four years every year my revenue doubled.

00:15:18.450 --> 00:15:28.230 Tony Alessandra: It was that dramatic a difference because now people not only could hear me, they could see me. So those were two major

00:15:30.690 --> 00:15:31.200 Graham Dobbin: While

00:15:32.580 --> 00:15:36.900 Graham Dobbin: We were going to just take a very short break. But after the break, I'm going to be really curious about

00:15:36.990 --> 00:15:44.190 Graham Dobbin: What do you think technology can do know for the likes of speakers communicators trainers facilitators, where we can go with that and

00:15:44.520 --> 00:15:52.650 Graham Dobbin: Really, really love to dig in a little bit about your interest and how you got interested in the psychology of selling and the psychology behind business and

00:15:53.280 --> 00:16:04.290 Graham Dobbin: You're listening to the mind behind leadership with me. Graham Dobbin we're live from New York City on talk radio dot NYC and we are speaking with Dr. Tony Alessandra. We'll be right back after these

00:18:13.020 --> 00:18:23.310 Graham Dobbin: Welcome back, you're listening to the mind behind leadership and we're speaking with Dr. Tony, our Sandra just before we go on to the technology partners and wouldn't pick up on something you mentioned earlier.

00:18:23.820 --> 00:18:30.300 Graham Dobbin: And how difficult was it how difficult a choice. Was it to give up a job after eight years.

00:18:31.380 --> 00:18:40.500 Graham Dobbin: To do something completely different about a lot of people. We all get opportunities. Not everybody takes them. I'm just wondering how that felt to actually make that choice.

00:18:41.010 --> 00:18:42.600 Tony Alessandra: It was a difficult choice. I can tell you

00:18:42.600 --> 00:19:01.500 Tony Alessandra: Then being a college Prof. First of all, I taught three courses three classes a semester, which was nine hours a week, plus five hours of office time which was, but I had to do. So imagine I've been charged 14 hours a week, of course, there's prep.

00:19:03.180 --> 00:19:03.780 Tony Alessandra: And

00:19:05.160 --> 00:19:25.560 Tony Alessandra: Assistance all my materials free books. I mean, it really was a cushy job to leave that and then have to do all that for myself, my own health insurance and disability and everything that the college was giving me

00:19:27.000 --> 00:19:29.550 Tony Alessandra: It was it was difficult, but

00:19:31.260 --> 00:19:33.570 Tony Alessandra: You know, I, I knew what I was making

00:19:34.590 --> 00:19:38.160 Tony Alessandra: While I was a college Prof. I was actually making more money.

00:19:39.510 --> 00:19:40.140 Tony Alessandra: Speaking

00:19:41.160 --> 00:19:56.730 Tony Alessandra: So when I made that transition. It wasn't like I really was losing. I was losing a little bit of money. Obviously my feet. My teaching salary and then had to pick up all those additional costs. So it was a was a little

00:19:57.870 --> 00:20:19.770 Tony Alessandra: difficult and challenging but you know one of the things that I pride myself on is my focus and I decided, let me block everything else out. Let me put my blinders on and focus on making this work and and I did so it really, you know, sometimes you got to

00:20:21.540 --> 00:20:24.270 Tony Alessandra: Step off the cliff, so to speak, and hope.

00:20:24.390 --> 00:20:26.310 Tony Alessandra: That drop is not that that

00:20:27.750 --> 00:20:32.460 Graham Dobbin: And it normally it normally isn't as big as we might think it might be, um, I

00:20:33.600 --> 00:20:36.060 Graham Dobbin: Also, I just wondered if there was anything that you lost you.

00:20:37.230 --> 00:20:43.710 Graham Dobbin: Were spoken about you're coming from the projects and 26 Street in New York, all of a sudden you're a professor

00:20:44.070 --> 00:20:59.670 Graham Dobbin: Or not of a sudden I mean you've worked really hard to get there, but you are a professor at University, and that must have felt like a world away from from from where you started. And now you are giving that up with did that ever come into so not just financially, but also maybe emotionally

00:21:00.420 --> 00:21:07.410 Tony Alessandra: Well, it didn't bother me. It certainly bothered my, my wife at the time. My ex wife.

00:21:11.130 --> 00:21:14.130 Tony Alessandra: Yeah it did bother her because she she did like the

00:21:15.630 --> 00:21:23.730 Tony Alessandra: prestige of being a college professors wife and you know all the events that take place, but

00:21:24.990 --> 00:21:41.100 Tony Alessandra: You know, my mother was a driving force in my life. My mother pushed and pushed me for education. That's why I went all the way through and not that she pushed me to get a PhD, but pushed me to

00:21:41.730 --> 00:21:50.970 Tony Alessandra: To get educated and my mother, you know I paraphrase this by my mother always taught me to go the extra

00:21:51.990 --> 00:22:10.560 Tony Alessandra: Now, most people would say mile, but my mother said go the extra inch and basically the extra inch was constant daily self improvement you learn another word WALK ANOTHER STEP give one more.

00:22:12.420 --> 00:22:14.070 Tony Alessandra: Compliment to somebody

00:22:15.330 --> 00:22:30.120 Tony Alessandra: You know, whatever it was, improve each area of my life. Just a little bit each and every day. It's so simple going the extra inch. And she said, you know, when you go enough extra inches, guess what.

00:22:30.900 --> 00:22:32.370 Tony Alessandra: You've gone the extra mile.

00:22:32.370 --> 00:22:48.390 Tony Alessandra: Room. And so I have been driven my entire life, including I mean today still driven for constant self improvement always attempting to improve myself every way possible.

00:22:49.980 --> 00:23:00.630 Graham Dobbin: I'm wondering, we speak to leaders almost on a daily basis. When we talk about goals or or what we're setting ourselves to go for. I sometimes wonder if we set the goals too big.

00:23:01.470 --> 00:23:09.270 Graham Dobbin: And don't actually look you look at how we can get them just to detain improvements. You think that's something that, that's almost pushed on us.

00:23:09.630 --> 00:23:20.370 Graham Dobbin: That everybody wants to be an entrepreneur. Everybody wants to be a star of some kind, and we want something really quickly quitters just that incremental change will actually be quicker for us all.

00:23:20.820 --> 00:23:23.370 Tony Alessandra: Yeah. You know the old sayings.

00:23:24.420 --> 00:23:47.040 Tony Alessandra: Every great journey begins with a single step. One of the things that I tell whenever my my employees or my business partner is faced with a big challenge or task I use this thing and he laughs at it now, even if I bring it up. I say, how to eat an elephant.

00:23:48.210 --> 00:23:49.410 Tony Alessandra: One bite at a time.

00:23:50.730 --> 00:23:56.550 Tony Alessandra: So even now, when I say how do you eat. He says, all right, I know one bite at a time. I don't even have to finish it.

00:23:57.810 --> 00:23:58.740 Tony Alessandra: But yeah, you know,

00:24:00.480 --> 00:24:18.330 Tony Alessandra: Every, every journey. If I want to go from point A to point B, you know, you just can't like in Star Trek, you know, telecommute yourself over there. You've got to make the journey, step by step, you know, block by block mile by mile

00:24:19.410 --> 00:24:23.310 Tony Alessandra: And I think people who are overly impatient to get there.

00:24:24.540 --> 00:24:31.560 Tony Alessandra: Possibly put too much pressure and stress on themselves, their family and their, their team.

00:24:33.060 --> 00:24:33.360 Tony Alessandra: Yeah.

00:24:33.450 --> 00:24:40.620 Graham Dobbin: And I also think that sometimes people maybe give up a little bit too early because I'm not recognizing what they are, what they are doing really well.

00:24:41.640 --> 00:24:48.690 Graham Dobbin: Back in back onto the technology. So this was this was probably a little step at the time it was one of those things that just

00:24:49.170 --> 00:24:58.530 Graham Dobbin: That you just saw. So What technology do you think so they know that could be a game changer for speakers and facilitators, do you think there's anything they are coming up.

00:24:59.190 --> 00:25:10.350 Tony Alessandra: Yeah, there is. Well, of course, what we're doing right here says some many speakers, you know, here we are in in the middle of coven 19

00:25:11.400 --> 00:25:12.750 Tony Alessandra: Which has been

00:25:13.890 --> 00:25:17.550 Tony Alessandra: Earth shattering for the speaking profession.

00:25:18.990 --> 00:25:31.590 Tony Alessandra: So many of my speaker buddies and colleagues have had this you know revenue source pulled from beneath them. There's no live meetings going on.

00:25:32.160 --> 00:25:40.470 Tony Alessandra: You know, face to face meetings. In fact, I have a meeting coming up next month in Nashville, Tennessee.

00:25:40.920 --> 00:25:48.600 Tony Alessandra: But, but they told me, You know what, we're going to, we're going to go virtual now because we can't have a meeting with all of our association.

00:25:49.410 --> 00:26:11.310 Tony Alessandra: So what I'm doing, instead of doing zoom like we're doing right now i i do best. When I can stand up and deliver. So I'm actually going into a studio. I'm doing it tomorrow. By the way, at 2pm Pacific I'm going into a studio I am filming my speech.

00:26:12.450 --> 00:26:25.290 Tony Alessandra: I'm having in post production, you know, any slides, put in. I'll have the logo of the company. I have a green screen behind me so I can put any you know image I want behind me, but I'm up talking

00:26:27.420 --> 00:26:32.730 Tony Alessandra: And it just the energy is different, you know,

00:26:33.870 --> 00:26:42.030 Tony Alessandra: YOU KNOW IF I WERE RIGHT NOW, STANDING UP, TALKING TO YOU. I probably would have more animation and maybe even a little bit more

00:26:44.190 --> 00:26:56.880 Tony Alessandra: Intonation in my voice. I don't know. But that's what, that's, that's what I'm going to do now, we can take it further. You've actually probably seen that there have actually been concerts.

00:26:57.690 --> 00:27:08.970 Tony Alessandra: Where they brought Elvis Presley and Michael Jackson and you know to park and and they've done it through. What do they call that

00:27:09.480 --> 00:27:11.370 Graham Dobbin: I know that it's like a 3D imagery, so

00:27:11.850 --> 00:27:13.980 Tony Alessandra: The image a holographic

00:27:14.010 --> 00:27:15.090 Graham Dobbin: holography listen

00:27:15.390 --> 00:27:28.230 Tony Alessandra: So is it possible that speakers can do that and and I will tell you about three or four years ago at one of the annual national speakers Association meetings events.

00:27:28.620 --> 00:27:37.590 Tony Alessandra: One of our Hall of Fame speakers got up on the platform. He performs a lot with guitar and sings and everything, but definitely a

00:27:38.610 --> 00:27:40.020 Tony Alessandra: motivational speaker.

00:27:41.220 --> 00:27:45.180 Tony Alessandra: And he said, You know, I always wanted to play.

00:27:48.600 --> 00:28:01.020 Tony Alessandra: You know guitar with myself. And so he literally brought a holographic image where he communicated with his own holographic image on stage.

00:28:01.650 --> 00:28:15.810 Tony Alessandra: And it was just I opening. Now, it obviously was a bit expensive for most sneakers to do, but I think that's something that definitely is coming down the road, maybe sooner than later with

00:28:17.160 --> 00:28:21.990 Tony Alessandra: What's happening in the world with with live meetings. So who knows

00:28:22.230 --> 00:28:31.500 Graham Dobbin: But essentially, because I mean this this week. And even this evening after this. I'm working in Sydney, Australia from New York will be working in South Africa and the UK.

00:28:32.460 --> 00:28:40.710 Graham Dobbin: I'm doing different types of training and sales meetings I just wonder as a professional speaker so the training. I agree with you. I've got to stand up. We've got to get the energy going

00:28:41.100 --> 00:28:53.580 Graham Dobbin: And there is that interaction. Just wondering as a speaker when you're doing a holographic or your pre recording. How much do you miss that interaction, especially your style, your audience.

00:28:53.700 --> 00:28:58.350 Tony Alessandra: Yeah, my style, truly, truly feeds off the audience.

00:28:58.380 --> 00:29:01.260 Tony Alessandra: Absolutely, there is something that that's lost there.

00:29:02.640 --> 00:29:12.150 Tony Alessandra: But you know there. There's technology today, it actually exists where you could be in a studio there, there could be screens.

00:29:12.360 --> 00:29:12.810 Tony Alessandra: And

00:29:12.870 --> 00:29:30.810 Tony Alessandra: And you see the audience, wherever they are, and they see you. You see them. You can ask questions, they can communicate. It's almost like giving almost not quite a live talk, you can see the people you can see them laughing and smiling.

00:29:31.890 --> 00:29:35.850 Tony Alessandra: You know, so it it's getting a lot better. I

00:29:37.050 --> 00:29:50.490 Tony Alessandra: I'm part of a group a mastermind group, but one of the members of this group is from Scotland. Another one from Germany, South Africa, Australia to from the United States, etc. What

00:29:54.450 --> 00:29:56.850 Tony Alessandra: Trying to think one from. I said, Germany.

00:29:56.910 --> 00:29:57.420 So anyway.

00:29:58.770 --> 00:30:17.730 Tony Alessandra: We had one of our members do a presentation with zoom where he showed us what he has built in his home where it's multi camera it's multi screen. It's different lighting. He has a a

00:30:19.140 --> 00:30:34.080 Tony Alessandra: switcher that he can press different buttons, where slides can come up video examples can come up, he can, you know, change screens. I mean, or cameras. Excuse me.

00:30:35.460 --> 00:30:42.870 Tony Alessandra: Really it was unbelievable. And I'm saying to myself, this. I mean, look, look at what we're doing right now. This is

00:30:43.560 --> 00:30:58.530 Tony Alessandra: Really a simple zoom meeting his is a multi media presentation and it costs several thousands of dollars but you know as a speaker, you know, we get 1520 $25,000 for a speech one speech, you can

00:30:58.980 --> 00:31:08.820 Tony Alessandra: Set up your whole house to do that. Now the question is, why on I have it. And the reason is back into

00:31:10.650 --> 00:31:25.050 Tony Alessandra: Year 2000 I made a major another major decision. Like I made in 1978 78 I decided I'm leaving academia and I'm going to be a full time speaker.

00:31:25.860 --> 00:31:39.780 Tony Alessandra: And I have to tell you that speaking, you know, I was averaging about 100 paid speeches, a year all over the world. And it was burning me out. I have 12.5 million frequent flyer miles. That's how much I have flown

00:31:40.530 --> 00:31:47.850 Tony Alessandra: And I, I, I just was burned out. So in 2000 I went to my head of marketing.

00:31:48.300 --> 00:31:57.750 Tony Alessandra: And her name is Holly. And I said, Holly, you know, I've, I've hinted about this with you. We've chatted about it. Although, you know, we never knew if or when it was going to come

00:31:58.200 --> 00:32:07.650 Tony Alessandra: But it's going to come this year. This was the beginning of 2020 and in August of 2020 I spun off my entire speaking business.

00:32:08.130 --> 00:32:30.000 Tony Alessandra: Employees the office, the computers the database everything. And I said, This is yours. And what I'm going to do now is, you'll still do for me what you have been doing for me, but I'm only going to pay you percentages. So what I did is I offloaded all this fixed overhead.

00:32:30.900 --> 00:32:38.070 Tony Alessandra: Made it variable only paid when I got a speech only paid when they sold my product my books, my

00:32:38.100 --> 00:32:41.940 Tony Alessandra: Tapes, etc. And then I got them three other speakers.

00:32:43.230 --> 00:32:50.100 Tony Alessandra: Today she has like 16 speakers, including burn a brown. You know who's

00:32:50.100 --> 00:32:51.540 Graham Dobbin: About to do

00:32:52.290 --> 00:32:56.310 Tony Alessandra: You know, at the beginning, I was the biggest speaker. Now I'm just a little, you know,

00:32:58.590 --> 00:32:58.920 Graham Dobbin: That

00:32:59.820 --> 00:33:09.450 Graham Dobbin: We need, we need to go to a break after the break, we will get to the psychology, the selling and business. And really, what was it that hook you into that and where does that take in you.

00:33:09.630 --> 00:33:16.740 Graham Dobbin: It was into the mind behind leadership with me grim Dobbin we're speaking with Dr. Tony Alessandra. We'll be right back after these

00:35:35.580 --> 00:35:41.130 Graham Dobbin: Welcome back, you're listening to the mind behind leadership we are with Dr. Tony Alessandra and

00:35:42.360 --> 00:35:47.340 Graham Dobbin: As we mentioned before, I'm really interested by the psychology of selling in business.

00:35:49.320 --> 00:35:59.280 Graham Dobbin: They seem to be a hot topic kind of the early 70s coming through the 80s and NLP coming through and a whole host of other things we're becoming more self awareness. Where did you come into with this.

00:36:00.270 --> 00:36:11.820 Tony Alessandra: Well I what all the way through my college courses I took psychology courses and it just intrigued me. I was very interested in it and

00:36:13.260 --> 00:36:17.670 Tony Alessandra: Then when I was in my doctoral program again in 1974

00:36:18.930 --> 00:36:30.240 Tony Alessandra: I, I went to this workshop in somebody's home and they were doing a little presentation about social styles. The four behavioral styles.

00:36:31.230 --> 00:36:43.800 Tony Alessandra: The social styles, where the expressive the amiable the analytical and the driver and I looked at this and I said, This is my future. I love it. I was just

00:36:44.670 --> 00:36:55.110 Tony Alessandra: blown away by it. And in fact, I went from Dr. David Schwartz my dissertation Chairman. And I said, I want to do my dissertation on this topic. And he said, absolutely not.

00:36:55.830 --> 00:37:11.640 Tony Alessandra: You had your dissertation proposal accepted just go do that. And when you get your PhD and leave here. Then if you want to pursue that other thing pursue it, which is exactly what I did.

00:37:13.080 --> 00:37:18.600 Tony Alessandra: And so I started doing more research and writing on the subject, and then created my own

00:37:19.650 --> 00:37:23.400 Tony Alessandra: Assessment of paper based assessment, which I call the platinum rule.

00:37:24.840 --> 00:37:41.670 Tony Alessandra: And sold. I mean 10s upon 10s of thousands of copies of that. And then in 96 I decided when my platinum rule book came out, I decided to put the platinum rule assessment online. It was the first online.

00:37:42.330 --> 00:37:44.100 Tony Alessandra: And I allowed people to take it for free.

00:37:44.100 --> 00:37:50.490 Tony Alessandra: And about 10,000 people a month we're taking it for free at one A Webby Award, which is sort of like an Oscar.

00:37:51.630 --> 00:37:55.230 Tony Alessandra: On the internet. I got, I was the

00:37:56.430 --> 00:37:59.670 Tony Alessandra: Website of the week in USA Today.

00:38:00.810 --> 00:38:14.280 Tony Alessandra: You name it. I mean, it really, really took off. And so then, let's go to 2000 when I told Holly that I'm going to spend off my speaking business to her.

00:38:14.820 --> 00:38:30.570 Tony Alessandra: And just have her book me, etc. I said that what I'm going to do is I'm going to build this assessment business into an actual business because up to that point, I was having everybody take the assessment for free, hoping they'd buy my other products.

00:38:30.930 --> 00:38:40.680 Tony Alessandra: But in 2000 I decided, you know what, I'm going to take my speaking revenue, not all of it, but a good amount of it. And I'm going to actually create

00:38:42.300 --> 00:38:56.280 Tony Alessandra: An assessment platform. And I looked, I looked out. First of all, I got this young kid 22 years old and I said, I want you to help. I want you to program this for me.

00:38:57.210 --> 00:39:06.720 Tony Alessandra: That was in 2000 here we are, you know, 20 years later, he has my CEO of the company that's that's how much he has grown

00:39:07.470 --> 00:39:22.980 Tony Alessandra: Brandon Parker incredible story about how that guy came from 22 year old just the programmer to running my company now and he's a significant part owner of that company because he's, he just has been incredible. But

00:39:24.270 --> 00:39:42.150 Tony Alessandra: As that assessment business grew. I started slowly cutting back on the number of speeches I was giving. So in 99 I did 99 paid speeches and as we went on, I would go down to 80 and 70 and 60 and here where you are in

00:39:43.620 --> 00:39:46.140 Tony Alessandra: And I do zero

00:39:47.220 --> 00:39:58.200 Tony Alessandra: And it's not that I do. I shouldn't say I do zero I just mentioned earlier that I'm doing a speech in the studio tomorrow, but I don't have to do any and and I really

00:39:59.070 --> 00:40:06.270 Tony Alessandra: I don't necessarily want to do any, you know, I don't mind doing it like let's say zoom or in a studio, but

00:40:06.780 --> 00:40:23.100 Tony Alessandra: This this assessment business has really taken off. And it's the revenue of this assessment business is multiples of what my best year of speaking ones. And just imagine you know I was what I was earning and speaking

00:40:24.810 --> 00:40:34.860 Tony Alessandra: This this business is great and I could run the assessment business literally from anywhere where I can have high speed internet and the computer. So, I love it.

00:40:36.450 --> 00:40:51.990 Tony Alessandra: But it's that's like the psychology just hooked me. And it wasn't just building the psychology into sales and into service and into relationships, but then building it into this assessment business and boy.

00:40:52.410 --> 00:40:58.320 Tony Alessandra: By the way, Graham. My first customer talk about, I don't know, maybe I have an angel on one shoulder. I don't

00:40:59.010 --> 00:41:02.910 Tony Alessandra: But my first customer was Ken Blanchard, the author of the

00:41:03.390 --> 00:41:04.650 Tony Alessandra: One minute manager so

00:41:04.680 --> 00:41:10.230 Tony Alessandra: You're really really helped me and you know now.

00:41:11.280 --> 00:41:17.670 Tony Alessandra: Not only do we do business with Ken Blanchard but we are the assessment provider for numerous

00:41:18.330 --> 00:41:34.650 Tony Alessandra: Companies and training companies and even big name speakers like Brian Tracy Grant Cardone Tony Robbins, they all do their assessment business through my assessments, you know, assessments 24 seven so

00:41:36.030 --> 00:41:36.990 Tony Alessandra: It really

00:41:38.550 --> 00:41:39.270 Graham Dobbin: Really good.

00:41:39.720 --> 00:41:50.490 Graham Dobbin: There's one that you mentioned earlier, the kind of the flagship for you to platinum rule. So about treating others how they want to be treated. When did you realize that the golden rule wasn't enough.

00:41:51.840 --> 00:41:52.770 Tony Alessandra: Probably back

00:41:53.820 --> 00:42:04.740 Tony Alessandra: In the 70s and the early 70s. I just said, you know, the golden rule. You know, I'm very aware of course being Italian. You know that old saying, When in Rome, do as the Romans.

00:42:06.300 --> 00:42:17.610 Tony Alessandra: Which really basically said, hey, when you are in that country, you need to adapt and adjust. You can't be quote the ugly American

00:42:17.970 --> 00:42:28.320 Tony Alessandra: You know, dealing like an American in Italy, it won't work. And one of the examples that I use is that, you know, if you were going on a business trip and one day you were in Italy.

00:42:29.430 --> 00:42:39.000 Tony Alessandra: You know, trying to make sales and the next day you were in Germany, trying to make sales would you behave exactly the same way. The answer is, No, you wouldn't. You need to adapt.

00:42:39.540 --> 00:42:52.920 Tony Alessandra: And there is the platinum rule treat people the way they want need to be treated adjust your style. The whole concept is adaptability. You don't become something different. You

00:42:53.340 --> 00:43:00.750 Tony Alessandra: It's almost like learning to speak another language. Instead of linguistically you're speaking on language behaviorally. That's it.

00:43:02.340 --> 00:43:07.590 Graham Dobbin: I'm just very briefly. We're about we're about to go to final break. I'm just wondering

00:43:08.040 --> 00:43:22.500 Graham Dobbin: When you're looking at assessment. A lot of that is about how we adapt to you saying in different areas with different people is that any conflict there where we're adapting your style to others rather than being, is there any conflict with those being authentic you think

00:43:22.920 --> 00:43:36.090 Tony Alessandra: No, I think, for instance, let's say that you are a smoker and you are, you have a business meeting and you know in advance through your, your research that the person you're calling on is an avowed non smoker.

00:43:36.840 --> 00:43:56.550 Tony Alessandra: What would you do, would you ask, do you mind if I smoke or would you not even attempt to smoke. Does that make you a different person. Does that make you a chameleon or whatever, it doesn't. What you are doing is taking on a little bit of personal

00:43:57.450 --> 00:44:12.210 Tony Alessandra: tension and stress in order to reduce the interpersonal stress. You know, I have four kids, we can get into this after the break, but I have four kids all four styles dominant

00:44:14.520 --> 00:44:18.750 Tony Alessandra: Steady and conscientious and I've learned. You got to deal with them differently.

00:44:19.350 --> 00:44:20.880 Graham Dobbin: Was a deliberate for kids.

00:44:21.330 --> 00:44:22.620 Tony Alessandra: Just wasn't

00:44:24.060 --> 00:44:25.200 Tony Alessandra: Even if it was

00:44:25.290 --> 00:44:27.300 Tony Alessandra: To get one of each file.

00:44:27.510 --> 00:44:29.010 Tony Alessandra: It was like hitting the lottery.

00:44:31.890 --> 00:44:40.620 Graham Dobbin: You're listening to the mind behind leadership by with me. Graham Dobbin we're speaking with Dr. Tony Alessandra and we will come join you right after these messages.

00:46:36.600 --> 00:46:45.510 Graham Dobbin: Welcome back, you're listening to talk radio dot NYC we're with Dr. Tony, our Sandra I'm when we talk about assessment you talk about the assessment center.

00:46:46.770 --> 00:46:51.900 Graham Dobbin: Just kind of tying it back into what we're going through at the moment. There's lots of teams, things have changed.

00:46:52.230 --> 00:46:59.910 Graham Dobbin: And we're trying to understand one of one of the discussions, I'm having a regular basis knows about taking the guesswork out of what's happening.

00:47:00.900 --> 00:47:08.910 Graham Dobbin: Because we've got teams that are all virtual you know that whatever teams left in March is not the same. Now, regardless of where we're we're sitting with us in the office or not.

00:47:09.600 --> 00:47:18.660 Graham Dobbin: What was your thoughts on that and how did, how do you see that having an assessment into the behavioral styles of thought processes of a team would help them.

00:47:19.620 --> 00:47:35.880 Tony Alessandra: Right. So one of our most popular assessments is assessment called disc. The ISC. It's sort of like the social styles assessment that I learned in the early 70s. It stands for dominance influence steadiness and conscientiousness.

00:47:37.260 --> 00:47:39.600 Tony Alessandra: And and that is crucial.

00:47:40.620 --> 00:47:52.980 Tony Alessandra: So that each member of the team understands what their strengths and struggles are particularly in dealing with people who have different styles, different strengths different struggles

00:47:54.900 --> 00:48:02.970 Tony Alessandra: Right now with with coven right now. We're so many people have been laid off so many people have possibly lost their jobs.

00:48:04.140 --> 00:48:09.570 Tony Alessandra: But as things get better companies now need to make some decisions decision, number one.

00:48:11.160 --> 00:48:14.730 Tony Alessandra: Do I hire back any of the people that I furloughed

00:48:15.930 --> 00:48:19.170 Tony Alessandra: And if so, which people number two.

00:48:20.220 --> 00:48:32.250 Tony Alessandra: I have some employees do I want to keep them in their present position because I really value them or do I want to move them into another position where they'd be more successful and number three.

00:48:33.420 --> 00:48:46.710 Tony Alessandra: Now that many businesses, whether they're full or partially virtual with their employees. Now I can hire people, not just in my city.

00:48:47.460 --> 00:48:55.050 Tony Alessandra: Or state that I can hire employees from all over the world. So now how do I determine

00:48:55.530 --> 00:49:07.740 Tony Alessandra: Who I want to rehire who I want to move into different positions and who I want to have, and do I get candidates from around the world who can work remotely.

00:49:08.550 --> 00:49:24.000 Tony Alessandra: But make sure that I'm hiring the right people, because it is so incredibly expensive to hire the wrong person so incredibly expensive to not hire the right person and have them get hired by a competitor.

00:49:24.870 --> 00:49:34.620 Tony Alessandra: So one of our assessments, which is called higher sense H AI R E se se higher sense, it's a it's a combination.

00:49:35.430 --> 00:49:47.460 Tony Alessandra: Of three different assessments. This motivators and Hartman value profile and it it really almost takes the guesswork out of

00:49:48.150 --> 00:50:00.930 Tony Alessandra: Which employees or which candidates are going to be successful. It's not and i i'm going to say this out loud. It is not the only tool you use in hiring.

00:50:01.680 --> 00:50:24.630 Tony Alessandra: Or you know relocating an employee, it is another as they say an arrow in your quiver just another thing. In addition to their, their resume the interview the recommendations from former employers their work experience their education, but you know some many of those things are very subjective.

00:50:25.980 --> 00:50:42.690 Tony Alessandra: When somebody is in an interview so many people have been coached and they put on their best, you know, their best self a resume. People have jokingly called the resume a balance sheet with no debits

00:50:43.050 --> 00:50:44.730 Tony Alessandra: Because you ever talking about

00:50:44.820 --> 00:50:46.770 Tony Alessandra: Something negative on a resume.

00:50:47.070 --> 00:50:59.340 Tony Alessandra: Absolutely. You know, so what what this higher sense or assessments, you know, there are other assessments, but what what it does is it is it inserts some

00:50:59.880 --> 00:51:14.490 Tony Alessandra: Objectivity into the hiring process and we have examples of people using higher sense and getting an incredible

00:51:14.940 --> 00:51:28.830 Tony Alessandra: Employee that they are just saying I cannot believe that we, we hit the jackpot with this. We even had an example, recently this recent example where somebody said, you know, we have an employee that is not working out.

00:51:30.210 --> 00:51:37.320 Tony Alessandra: And we said, Look, I'll tell you what we'll do, let us give you this higher sense assessment have that employee, take it and we will tell you.

00:51:38.760 --> 00:51:50.010 Tony Alessandra: About this employee. And so the employee took the assessment, we went on with their boss and said, here are the issues, you're probably having and they said, that is exactly

00:51:50.490 --> 00:51:59.550 Tony Alessandra: The problems we are having. Why didn't I use you. Before we hired this employee because we probably never would have hired him so assessments.

00:52:00.600 --> 00:52:10.830 Tony Alessandra: They do a variety of things right now with the coven and hiring. That's a biggie. But the whole teamwork and and you know, now we're spread out.

00:52:12.300 --> 00:52:27.270 Tony Alessandra: You know, and we have to do teams virtually virtual teams are very different than in person teams, but even within person teams. How do we get the most were one plus one plus one plus one on a team equals five or 10

00:52:27.780 --> 00:52:37.350 Tony Alessandra: And not two or three where we're working together, where the the parts are greater than, than the whole, so to speak, so

00:52:38.520 --> 00:52:50.670 Tony Alessandra: It's just, it's fascinating to me, you know, my, my intriguing interest early on in psychology and what I'm doing today, it's just, it's magical. It really is.

00:52:51.570 --> 00:53:07.380 Graham Dobbin: Um, this time is flying pie. It's absolutely flying by, we only have about five minutes left. And one of the things I really want to touch on is an author of 30 books. Know the books are primarily around the psychology of selling and business and assessing um

00:53:09.030 --> 00:53:13.860 Graham Dobbin: Most people think they've got a book in them. Some people write a book that you've done 30

00:53:15.360 --> 00:53:18.090 Graham Dobbin: How did you, what was the starting point.

00:53:18.360 --> 00:53:28.260 Tony Alessandra: Well, you know, I'm, I'm a driven person, the starting point was my very first book, which was called non manipulative selling and in the early days in the mid 70s.

00:53:29.010 --> 00:53:38.670 Tony Alessandra: I was doing a lot of workshops and I would have to do handouts for these workshops and and each time we did a workshop

00:53:39.120 --> 00:53:50.070 Tony Alessandra: We update the the handouts and the handouts became bigger and bigger and bigger. And I said, You know what, we have a lot here. Let's make it into a book, which we did that came out.

00:53:50.490 --> 00:54:05.730 Tony Alessandra: Interestingly enough, I told you that I left the academic environment in December of 78 went full time in January 279 as a speaker non manipulative selling the book came out in January of 79 and it became a business card for me.

00:54:06.870 --> 00:54:08.460 Tony Alessandra: Then with that book.

00:54:09.570 --> 00:54:15.570 Tony Alessandra: I went to, and this is literally just before I left, academia with that book. I went to my

00:54:16.920 --> 00:54:20.970 Tony Alessandra: Fellow faculty member who was a leadership.

00:54:22.620 --> 00:54:30.960 Tony Alessandra: Professor, and I said, You know what, take a look at this book. Don't you think we can do something and put a twist on it so that instead of sales its leadership.

00:54:31.470 --> 00:54:38.490 Tony Alessandra: And he looked at it, he said, absolutely. We can do that, that became the art of managing people, ironically, although I'm known best

00:54:38.730 --> 00:54:51.960 Tony Alessandra: For relationship skills and selling skills and even service skills. My number one selling book which has sold over a quarter of a million copies is the art of managing people that I did with Dr. Phil Han Sacre. It's amazing.

00:54:52.830 --> 00:55:02.520 Tony Alessandra: So it just led another book another book a lot of them have been co authored with one or two other people. I even did one with Ivan Meisner and

00:55:06.660 --> 00:55:10.380 Graham Dobbin: We're just talking about it, but he's going to be coming on the show in about three weeks time as well.

00:55:10.530 --> 00:55:24.630 Tony Alessandra: Exactly. So I did, I did a book with Ivan. And, you know, just a lot of different people that you know two heads are better than one and getting their perspective and I'm just, again, I, I

00:55:26.160 --> 00:55:37.410 Tony Alessandra: Am a driven person on a high D very dominant driven. So that's why I've done so many of these books, it's, it's kind of crazy good

00:55:37.440 --> 00:55:42.810 Graham Dobbin: Just to finish this off tonight. You've got what you've got a lot of ideas, thoughts opinions about leadership.

00:55:43.440 --> 00:55:55.590 Graham Dobbin: And just in the last couple of minutes. What do you think the kind of the top three traits should be for leaders, what do you see as is the things that may be stand somewhere know and maybe a common thread. Okay, I would

00:55:55.680 --> 00:56:00.570 Tony Alessandra: I would think a really good leader, as well as a really good parent, by the way.

00:56:01.980 --> 00:56:18.900 Tony Alessandra: They're listening and feedback skills really being able to listen to people and and trying not to jump in and solve problems. I think vision is important. Your vision of the future, your resilience. Your bounce back

00:56:19.500 --> 00:56:28.500 Tony Alessandra: You know, we're at all hit with things. Heck coven now, you know, and all the things around that so resilience. How you bounce back

00:56:29.250 --> 00:56:39.960 Tony Alessandra: When you're you're hit with some setback, one of my mantras. Is this too shall pass and and whenever anything negative happens to me.

00:56:40.380 --> 00:56:49.620 Tony Alessandra: I'm always saying to myself, this too shall pass. So I really think that that that's crucial focus, making sure I don't get

00:56:50.310 --> 00:57:11.130 Tony Alessandra: Or leader doesn't get pulled in different directions. You know, if there is a goal if there's a direction if there's something I'd like to accomplish. Let's make sure that we're all on the same page. And last, especially in today's environment, but it's always been important is the tolerance.

00:57:12.330 --> 00:57:27.480 Tony Alessandra: tolerance of differences in people differences in race, religion, gender generally generation, you know, baby boomers and Gen X Gen Y. So all those are absolutely crucial for a good leader today.

00:57:27.990 --> 00:57:31.740 Graham Dobbin: Dr. Tony, our Sunday. It's been fascinating. I could speak with

00:57:32.160 --> 00:57:41.460 Graham Dobbin: All evening, but we've run out of time. Thank you so much for coming on, I would like to think we could maybe get you on again at some point and just talk about some of the other things that you've been up to.

00:57:41.700 --> 00:57:47.490 Graham Dobbin: Dr. Tony Alessandra thanks for being on the main behind leadership here live on talk radio dot NYC.

00:57:48.000 --> 00:57:49.230 Tony Alessandra: My pleasure. Thank you.

00:57:49.800 --> 00:57:49.980 All right.

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